My new favorite number is "squillion."

It seems I hear or read it all the time. Especially in my line of work.

The first time I read the number "squillion," it was a story about how much more the President was asking Congress for war funding.

It was like he was saying, "Now, I know we're $9 trillion in debt, and I know we've had to cut out various government programs, like, oh, education,  but we need to stay the course, nine-elebben, nine-elebben...and that's why I'm asking you for another SQUILLION DOLLARS."

A lot of people like to throw around the number "squillion" as if it means something. I think Dr. Evil once tried to blackmail the U.N. for it, and they just laughed him off.

But the number can be used for a lot of things! Like, say you want to build some Big Fucking Thing in town and you want some investors.

"The Compact Disc Jewelbox Historical Museum will attract approximately one squillion visitors each year."

You can use the word if you really want to quit your job and you don't want your current boss to even try to make a counter offer.

"Yeah, they're paying me a squillion more dollars to do the same job."

You can use it to make up statistics when you're arguing politics online.

"There are a squillion Americans without health insurance."

"Studies show you are a squillion times more likely to commit tax fraud if you are raised by same-sex parents."

"The U.S. Population is expected to reach a squillion by 2026. How are we going to have the resources to accomodate this rapid growth?"

So, when in doubt, just whip out a squillion here and there and everyone will think you're smarter than you really are and everyone will listen to what you have to say.

And your IQ will, like, immediately shoot up by a squillion points. For realz.