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Last Updated: 12/18/2009

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Monday, April 14, 2008 

Category: Life
My gynecologist is so charming. She's petite, she's nice, she's sweet - but dangit, she needs to change the photos on her ceiling.

Going to the gynecologist is never fun, but every gal needs to do it. The crazy thing is that at my gynecologist? Whenever I lay down on that table and await being in the most awkward position I'll ever be in under bright lights, My head looks straight up to the ceiling and nine times out of ten, this is what I will see:

anne geddes

Some stupid fucking Anne Geddes flowerpot kid.

And that's what makes my trip to the cooter mechanic the worst of all. The end.
Previous Post: All growed up | Back to Blog List | Next Post: Afterthoughts.
apryl

 
mine has a poster with a bunch of butterflys
 
Posted by apryl on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 2:47 PM
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the story of ~b
Bethany Rollins

 
Oh man. The Midwife I go has new stuffs in her office every single time. You go into the room, the lights are dimmed and if she needs a bright light she has one. I wish every lady could go to my midwife. She is awesome.
 
Posted by the story of ~b on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 2:47 PM
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Misha

 
Cooter mechanic- that cracked me up!

I agree with B, go to a midwife. Dim lights, soft stirrups, warm speculums and many other touches make the appointment more tolerable.
 
Posted by Misha on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 3:00 PM
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because write!

 
The above comments make me feel dumb (okay, that's not hard to do). I thought midwives just delivered babies. Wait, are y'all up there pregnant? Or can anybody with babymaking parts go to a midwife?

Good luck on your swab test, Ellie!
 
Posted by because write! on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 3:30 PM
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Misha

 
A lot of midwives are also Nurse Practitioners. But those who are not, often function much like a NP but without the ability to write prescriptions. Certified Nurse Midwives can take care of women from menses to the grave. I have a friend who had a very serious thyroid problem, it was detected by her midwife after being missed by her family doctor.
 
Posted by Misha on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 5:06 PM
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Nora

 
I want to be a C.N.M. someday. I really do. But then, I love Anne Geddes photos too. Geez! Ellie, you are such a scrooge!
 
Posted by Nora on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 8:24 PM
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AnthroGeek
Tanya Beer Sommelier

 
I hate those Anne Geddes pictures. I just lay there and stare into space . . .
 
Posted by AnthroGeek on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 4:06 PM
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WhyJustWhy just IS..

 
Yeah that would amp up the horrific factor for me. Mine has no pictures, but the last time I was there I noticed that they had a water stain - nice !
 
Posted by WhyJustWhy just IS.. on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 4:37 PM
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MamA Loves PuppIEs

 
Wow. Have fun with that.
 
Posted by MamA Loves PuppIEs on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 4:38 PM
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Just Mel
Melanie Wisdom

 
As if the trip wasn't bad enough. I'm sorry. Maybe you could send her a new poster for Christmas or something...
 
Posted by Just Mel on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 4:44 PM
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Mama Gaia

 
Mel's idea is brilliant. Just be sure to include a note about where the poster should be placed. For the record, my gyno has a wind chimey thing above one table, and in the other room, there's nothing... but then, that's probably because it's the ultrasound room, and if they put you in there, it's likely you'll be looking at the ultrasound screen.
 
Posted by Mama Gaia on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 5:09 PM
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Melissa

 
Okay. Anne Geddes freaks me out. Yikes.
 
Posted by Melissa on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 6:01 PM
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Velvet®

 
The cooter mechanic. HAHAHA.
 
Posted by Velvet® on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 6:35 PM
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Ruby

 
At least someone is touching at your vagina.
 
Posted by Ruby on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 8:50 PM
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HA! I love you Ruby.
 
Posted by on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 9:50 PM
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Melanie
Melanie King

 
I already suffered through mine a couple of weeks ago. Those pictures make me slightly nauseated.
 
Posted by Melanie on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 9:53 PM
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Lauren

 
You are the luckiest of lucky folks. Cooter mechanic and Anne Geddes all in the same experience.
 
Posted by Lauren on Monday, April 14, 2008 - 10:58 PM
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*DivineMrsM*

 
Cooter Mechanic
lololololololololololol
 
Posted by *DivineMrsM* on Tuesday, April 15, 2008 - 12:23 AM
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