AIM IM with Vince

9:10 AM

Help need dream interp.

Go.

I am on a schoolbus taking a trip with friends. The driver lets us know that there is a change of plans, we will be stopping at a puppy farm to play a game.

At the farm, we're informed that the puppies are hiding, and we each must find the puppy that means the most to us.

I hunt around and ultimately find a really, really cute puppy, and when I shout that I have found one, the puppy farmer comes over and picks up the rock the puppy is sitting on and gives it to me. I'm confused and disappointed that I don't get to keep the puppy.

...

I am led indoors with the rock. All of us, including my parents, sit around the table in a circle while the farmer tells us what a privilege it is to eat a stone like the ones we all have

Dubiously, I begin eating my rock. It is soft and crumbly like chalk, silty and gritty.  The flavor is sweeter than I expected, and I think it won't be so bad, but then about halfway through it I begin to choke and gag.  I run to the sink, retching and desperately trying to clear the stuff out of my mouth with my fingers and rinse it away with the faucet, embarassed that I couldn't manage to eat it all, and that I failed in front of my family.

The reason I am asking is that when I woke up this morning, I still felt very nauseated from the dream.  I feel sick and can still taste the dirt in my mouth.  It won't go away.

Do you remember anything about the farmer?

At first he seemed like a stranger, a "old wise man".  As we were around the table, I felt as if we were at my grandparent's house in Montana.  I suppose he may have been my grandfather, who actually is a farmer...

Well, do you want my "spiritual" reading?

it's been over an hour and I am still for some reason very queasy

like if I think about the dream too much, I feel like I'll throw up

this i strange for me

yes I do.

Well, the word for dog in Hebrew is Celev, which could also be broken down as C'lev, like a heart.

A farmer is a a Heklai,

That word beginning with the root for "Lawmaking," so I can't decide yet if you are dealing with a sort of Rex Mundi, or a sort of Adonai, but it is certainly your superior (as indicated by both your youth and your constant presence in a crowd).

What matters is that you cannot refuse the orders of your superior here.

It felt like an initiation..

So, you were taken to a farm, a place where this entity manages life, again, whether or not this is the Devil, this place is the Earth, the only real question on Devil/God here is whether you are a pessimist. I don't think you could tell the difference, honestly (not that I could).

But there is something revolutionary about the fact that you were each asked to take up something like a heart, which was a a silly living thing, not a heart itself. In this vision you chose a form for manifestation.

And you DID choose a puppy, the thing is that it was not the point.

Did the other children eat stones?

I couldn't tell.  I  didn't see them.

Then the answer is no.

I was sitting across the table from my parents and sisters, and they each had one.  But I went first.

You have to assume that the game was simpler for them, because the rules were subverted for you through personal contact with the master here.

Right.

If they were given stones it was also a personal honor...

It felt like that.

...And none of your business.

that's why I felt cheated that I didn't get to keep the puppy.  Like I was tricked into participating.

Well, you did get a puppy.

You just had bigger things to attend to.

Having chosen a form for your manifestation, there was attached to it a certain dharma, a great honor to take up.

And like eating the scroll in Ezekiels' vision, it was sweet.

You have to remember that Hosea (I think it was Hosea) had his lips seared by a coal before he could speak.

Of course the stone was bitter.

The question is why you were allowed to spit it out.

It would be interesting if it only became bitter as you went to spit it, growing more bitter as you went, perhaps the case because it is still bitter with you.

Are you having guilt, Tom?

...

And you went for water and not a piece of bread, and not for spitting, or for the fork; that is water, not earth, or wind. or fire.

Maybe you are feeling guilty for allowing emotional issues to change what you percieve as your spiritual path.

hmmmmm...

Not that I would tend to agree with you, or think that the dream means you should change your course, but that seems to be what you are thinking.

I also felt angry at being tricked into eating something which they acted like would be delicious.

Well, honorable and tasty have never been synonyms for me.

When I was four two neighbor kids tricked me into eating a mudball, telling me it was chocolate.  I gagged on it and their mother rinsed my mouth out with their garden hose

I just remembered that for the first time in  years.

Heh, well there is the seed of the dream.

Tell me more about that day.

I was still young enought to think that neighbor = friend

It was dusk

The mom was watering the lawn

After the kids did that, and the mom helped me, I suddenly realized that the mom was more of a friend to me than the kids were.  A confusing feeling.  Keep in mind at that age I was exposed to no one else my own age except my cousin .  So this was basically the first time I had been tricked or hurt by kids my age. 

Never realized that before.

A less spiritual reading would be to wonder why you are remembering that moment right now, and why you have added a farm, an authority figure, and why that mom has become your whole family.

it set a precedent

Why didn't the mom do more? She didn't seem angry at her kids.

hmmm...

I think you missed your calling vince

But was your father there?

No, he was at work.

I mean, in the dream, when you were at the farm.

I didn't know my family was there at all until I saw them at the table.  They didn't ride on the bus with me.

But was he there?

Yes

they had rocks too, remember?

and seemed skeptical about eating them

I went first.

The rocks represent rock music...

(joking)

If dream interpretation is my calling I will need a turban.

I meant as an analyst.

Oh, well I am considering a pastoral route.

The nausea is important then.

it has drawn the dream into my real life.

That is absolutely true.