Grab a cup of, it's a heavy duty one today.

Yesterday Lane 2 turned 14. It was also the day my 38-year-old cousin Paula died.

My cousin always had a heart condition, but I had no idea she was so sick. I guess no one knew. She had flu-like symptoms, simply said she didn't feel well, and collapsed. They couldn't revive her.

I remember when we were really young Mom would say, "Pray for Baby Paula." Every night we prayed for her as she endured open heart surgery, then recovery. If she came down with so much as a cold, we would pray some more. Just a small cold could take her fragile life.

By the time we hit double digits, she was like any other kid, except she had a "zipper" on her chest. She never got offended at my fascination with her scar. And she only smacked me once when I suggested the surgeon accidentally took out her booby bones while he was in there.

I spent a couple of weeks out of my summer there with her family in 1984. I remember the year because Van Halen's Album 1984, just came out. We listened to that until the tape warped. I felt like more than a cousin. For the first time in my life, I had a sister who I didn't want to fight with, tell on, or cause bodily harm to. We ran amok.

We got older. Life happened. I married. She married. We moved even farther away from each other. We turned into wedding and funeral friends. Sad, really.

I know when I get to the funeral home to say goodbye, I'll see many other family members whom I haven't seen since the last wedding or funeral. We'll reminisce, cry, laugh, and make plans to stay in touch more often.

We'll exchange phone numbers, email addresses and maybe for a couple of weeks, we will stay in touch. Then we will drift back into our own worlds. In my head, I'll convince myself that our family is just too big to remain in contact with everyone.

I'm already considering starting a family newsletter or blog, so history doesn't repeat itself. If I get cooperation, I'll be pleasantly surprised. Then, at the next wedding or funeral, maybe I'll feel like less of a self-absorbed asshole.

Do me a favor. Make a phone call to someone tonight. Any one of your friends or family members that you haven't spoken to in a while. Let me know how it goes.