ya mama so fat, it takes her TWO trips to haul ass.
ya mama so fat, every time she turns around its her birthday!
ya mama so fat, when I swerved to miss her in my car I ran outta gas.
ya mamma's so dumb she tripped on a cordless phone.
ya moma so tall, she tripped on a mountain and hit her head on the moon.

ya Mama so fat when she takes a shower her feet don't get wet.
ya mom's ankles so ashy, it looks like she kicks flour for a living.

ya mom got a nipple on her elbow, talkin bout breast feeding you from the top ropes.

ya mom wears a suede eye patch.

ya mom so old, she got footage of her and jesus doin windmills in the temple.

ya mom so old she complained to the bethleham inn keeper that the pregnant lady in the barn was too loud.

ya mama so fat, her shadow weighs a hundred pounds.
ya mama so ugly she uses a makeup line called 'Why Bother'.
ya mama so fat when she goes to the beach russian whalers appear and harpoon her. 
ya mama so fat n hairy that when she wears shorts it looks like a couple of gorillas holding up an altar of buddha.
ya mama got a mustache so bushy it look like a chinchilla with anxiety.

ya moms so old she helped GOD with the blueprints to earth.

ya moms so old dust gets her when it sits around too long.

ya moms so old she remembers dirt when it was this tall.

ya moms so dirty, chairs melt when she sits in em.

ya mama so dumb, she waited by the mailbox with her bags packed cause she heard people were getting amtracks in the mail.

new!haha.

ya mom's lisp so bad, ya pops tells her to just TALK to the lawn in the summer.

ya moms so old and chinkey eyed...her face was the model for the zipper.