Friends, Portlanders, kitsch-lovers, lend me your ears! I come not to praise the Velveteria's former location at NE 28th & Glisan but to bury it! Which is to say, in an Elizabethan sort of way, that the banditos, unicorns, burlesque dancers, and mack-truck Jesuses of Carl & Caren's kaleidoscopic collection haunt Pambiche's backside no more; our motley crew of cuteness is, like so many other creatures this time of year, in a state of migration, and will be re-established in a new and more magnificent nesting ground sometime in January. Where will our new location be? I say ask your Magic Eightball, but if the question is "Will it be in an even more awesome spot?", I would bet my Oregon kicker check that the answer will be, "Most definitely." Well, Magic Eightball, will there be a wonderful re-opening bash that perusers of this Myspace page will be informed of? "It is certain." But Magic Eightball, whatever is one to do while the Velveteria's collection wanders homelessly in search of shelter? How is one to find decent entertainment without crying clowns? "Reply hazy, try again ..."