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Current mood:stoned
What is Global Domination? It is exactly what it is... Domination on a global scale, warfare on a nuclear scale, a fat lady on a scale, guitar scales, fish scales, we scale walls and we rate mostly shitty bands on a 1-10 scale. We know metal, we write about metal, and our word is law.
Do you guys really know metal? No, we are liars. We like rap and r&b, you could even say that is our forte. Be sure to check out our reviews of Usher and Mary J. Blige. We are also huge fans of "Iraqi Idol" and we are responsible for "Rockstar:INXS" and "Supernova."I wanna be cool and write for you guys, can you tell me how to be cool? No, we are not in the business of giving out advice and being cool cannot be taught. Bribery is a good place to start however.
Why did GD start a myspace page? Mainly, we stalk underage girls but we needed a legitimate cover. We also plan to milk this baby for all its worth and spread the Domination like we spread your sisters legs.
I love your website, it's cute and cuddly and you described my favorite band in a most exquisite manner, where can I send letters of appreciation and naked pictures of my Uncle Pete? We know what he did to you. It's okay.Is it okay to have sex on the first date? Sluts rule. Don't use a condom either and make sure he/she is really dirty around the butt. Herpes is Metal!
Exactly how global are you? We are run, owned, and operated out of Sheboygan, Wisconsin and we have outsourced our staff from Guatemala. So clearly, we are pretty fucken global. We even have a Pole... that we dance on... in thongs. We have STD's.
You didn't review (insert shitty metal-core band here.) How come, they are my fav? If we haven't reviewed it yet, then it must really suck. Most of us have a penis and better things to do. When or if we ever get around to it, we'll be sure to inform you that you are wrong about your favorite band and life in general.
You guys need to grow up, Nightwish is pure metal at it most purest form in all of it's purity. Why don't you give them a chance? Are you scared? We give everybody a chance to suck... we do not descriminate. We fear nothing... except for SARS and being disemboweled through the ass by a Minotaur.
I wanna help support the Domination, how may I do so? First, you can gather large amounts of currency and jewels. Then you mail those to us. We then buy beer. Beer fuels our warmachine. Or you can go here...
Serving Satan since 2004
www.globaldomination.se
5:24 PM
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