So that's my answer. That's always been the answer to the question that all married people who project an air of happiness get..."why did you marry him?". To date, there hasn't been a single person in my life that makes me laugh like he does. The sex part? Not that I knew anything about it until the day we got married. Did I mention that Sophie can read now? A wink and nudge to those of you who got that.

Oh, right - that part. This is me glossing over what happens to be a big part of my continued attraction to that man. That's all I need to say. Onward - the comedy part. Here's the interesting thing. I know I've said it a dozen or so times. He's funny.  I mean really really funny - he's funny in that sarcastic man way of using peircing insight combined with the perfect amount of contempt and disproportionate anger towards what most would consider minutiae.

Today - he left me a voicemail that started like this "dude, Yasmin was running down the sidewalk like an idiot and managed to trip on her new shoes and right as she was falling the shoe flew into the sewer drain." and ended like this, "it was ridiculous, she's killing me. I gotta figure out what to do. You know she gets her coordination from you.". I had the girls in the office come in and listen to it. We all laughed - not unlike the time he left me a voicemail, all pissed off sounding "hey dude, I'm watching Shrek, you know in the beginning when he pulls that ear wax out of his ear to mak that candle? Totally unrealistic, it should be a LOT lumpier..." also hilarious.

Hmmm, what's a stay at home dad to do on summer break on his way to the diner with the girls (this summer, we don't have our usual summer nanny/pool nanny to take the girls off of his hands for a few hours each day - so Mondays has officially become breakfast at the diner Mondays, that's as far as he's gotten. It's gonna be a long one).  He's left with the responsibility of finding a way to fill their existence lo these long summer months.

I got the follow up voicemail, "dude I totally called the municipality and the lady on the phone was like 'don't lift the manhole cover, we'll send someone' I totally wanted to do it, though, that would have been crazy! I waited though, and the dudes came out and lifted the manhole cover and we got the shoe back.". Never in my life have I thought, "oh crap it went down the sewer" and thought "I'll call the sewer department"! So that's it. That's what does it every time.

Don't get me wrong, there are times when that thinly veiled sword dipped in rage and disguised as humor is thrust into me. That's when funny and passionate quickly become taunting and brutal. There are times when just the words and the force behind them make me reel, and depending on my own slightly odd emotional cycles, I may or may not be able to laugh, or even fire back.

The pendulum swings. It's the ebb and flow of all things. While Ted is quite capable of destroying me on a whim - he's also the only one who can put me back together. Strange, sometimes I like to have pity parties for myself, allow myself to burn with jealousy, or sink into a crazy spending cycle, but not for long. He knows exactly the difference between when I should be coddled or cut, run through once again. In a strange way, it's like a warped version of what our marriage used to be like when I was the rock, and he was a mess. Turnabout is surely fair play.

When we've lost our ability to serve as a source of joy to one another, when we no longer have the purest of intentions to guide and help - even while humorously pointing out each others glaring flaw of the moment, that's the moment I fear most. In the end, it's never going to be the phsyical. I see us on a porch somewhere, or in a nursing home together, laughing, picking each other's brains, trying to remember the thing that we did that time long ago that made us laugh so much.

Thanks Kristin. Thanks Vic. Thanks Steph. You guys reminded me this week.