You know 4 shows in 5 days in Texas is an excellent adventure when *takes big breath*:

1) You actually get to the airport on time (that is a first for me) enough to knock down 2 22 oz's of Sam Adams meanwhile watching "ESPN's coverage of an Auction" on tv

2) You miss your connecting flight to Dallas in Phoenix (airlines fault) so what do you do . . . drink more only to get queasy and some woman thought her strong perfume was like lettuce greens and only good for a certain amount of days so she uses like 1/3 of the bottle on herself. I could smell her a mile away...

3) When because the airlines fucked ur flight up you get upgraded to 1st class from Phoenix to Denver and basically you are so comfortable...ohh it is also funny to see the airlines over book 1st class and having to watch the Stewards and Stewardesses have to tell one person that they have to sit in coach was HI-LA-RI-OUS, esp. when one man is like "I don't give a fuk, I . . . Am . . . Not . . . Moving". He was a wiley man, but honestly was not gonna move for shit! Ohhh and on the plane 2 beers, bumping Grime, making jokes with Whizard...hilarious,

4) So due to the flight technicalitites we miss our Weds. nite show . . . but he this is Texas (denton) so what happens . . . the make a after party/HOUSE PARTY for Whizard and I to play at! Blue Moon, Coronas, Drum n Bass, big pitbull, crazy people, between DJ Whizard and DJ Bastard Mike a like 5 hour rinse out from 2am - 7am. Meeting crazy "Bridger McBridgington" (basically we [Whizard and I] gave everyone nicknames the entire trip such as "Cornelius Wheeler" - a wheelchair bound gynocologist who lost his legs at a major ovulation surge/trample at Lilith Fair 1998, who for some reason always needs someone to bring him an iron to his hotel room).

5) Waking up Thursday to the craziest Thunderstorm going on outside. Seriously I was like "Ummm Whizard, we may have to evacuate". Also making a list of all the nasty ass (well some were good) places we HAD to eat at, such as WATABURGER (we never made it there), THE WAFFLE HOUSE aka THE AWFUL HOUSE (I didn't make it there), TACO BUENO (i gave it a B), SONIC BURGER (ehhh when ur hungry everything tastes like filet mignon).

6) Taking in such quality movies such as KING KONG (some version starring Jeff Bridges) and that Martin Lawrence flick where he coaches those grade school misfits to the "state championships". Ohhh but watching things like this with Whizard and I, you have to love how we critique the movies literally. For instance . . . so King Kong for 1 was HORRIBLE special effects (nothing "special" about them), but why didn't the helicopters (at the end wen Kong climbs the building) stay like 100 feet away and just shoot Kong . . . was there a point of circling around him thus getting demolished by him. And in the Martin Lawrence movie i called out about 15 traveling calls, 30 "3 second" calls, numerous technical fouls . . . basically the officiating sucked/non-existant

7) Finding the illest as antique store where i was seriously contemplating buying a sword or 2. Next time i am in Denton i am mos def buying a sword (some like Civil War shit). I just didn't know how the hell to get that shit back on the plane. Seriously the weapons (knifes and swords) were on point in this store. Mos def next time i am blowing money there!!!

8) Does the movie Requiem For A Dream ever get old! Funny trying to get Whizard to look at ol dudes arm in the end when it is all mangled and fuk'd up! And Jennifer Connelly in that movie . . . hotness . . . in the end though . . . slutness.

9) Friday giving one of the most classic MC performances on wax, HA!!! Letz just say, 52 beers on tap, a cool ass bartender who let me sample a bunch, going Lawrence Taylor on Whizard on stage (aka tackling), the marquee sign outside pissing me off because it saying "TONITE: DJ WHIZARD AND MANY MORE" (no love, hahaha, I KID i am not that conceited), me dishing some of the greatest rhymes in history, "4...3...2...2...2...2...2...2" and it all being topped off with my dinner and lunch coming up and out of mouth all in a car ("yo i don't know too much, but i do know that you need to pull this car over NOW"). Ohhh the laundry list of "sorry's" was deep the next morning on my end!!!

10) By Saturday i was pretty much fully acclimated to Denton/Texas life. As in "time moving super slow" (for the life of me it always seemed like 3:30 in the afternoon), as in it raining hard for 20 min., but being muggy and hot, greasy food ohh and the the best . . . PLAYING DARTS!!! Sat. afternoon saw Whizard and I play darts (no lie) for 4-5 hours straight!!! We did not stop/take a break but once in order to get fruit punch from the refrigerator. No lead was ever safe. With me ahead one time by a shitload of points Whizard got like 6 bulls eyes . . . another time with him beating me like 230 - 20, i made a miraculous run at loading up on triple-20s. In the end I think Whizard won the over all series 7 to 5 (best out of 13 i suppose). Shooting darts outside on the patio with mosiqutos buzzing, windchimes "ah-chiming", dogs scampering around . . . yep this was Denton/Texas.

11) Finally on Sat. ate healthy at the homie Ruthie's place of work . . . ohhh that Turkey Brie hit the SPOT and yes the "ambiance" was on sufficient (ha).

12) Playing at MELTDOWN was very very intense and so much fun!!! Basically MELTDOWN is one of Texas' biggest events. It was ramm'd! Got there when TITAN and MC NEMONIC was on and they were rinsin' it. There was major heat coming from the speakers (and on the danncefloor literally). Then next DJ CATALYST (big Dj in Dallas) came on and played the set of the nite imo. Ohhh man he took it back to like 1999/2000 for me. It was like the perfect set for the setting and literally every song i was turning to someone like "ohhh man this tune is the shiiiiiit". Then it is onto the main room where it was RAMED JAMED and the vibes were thick. It was a "rave", but it was mixture of all kinds of people out in the crowd. Aphrodite got on (sidenote: it was cool that the main room had different genres and everyone stayed and brock'd out to each), anyways Aphrodite got on and I MC'd with him and the destruction was on!!! Tore that shit up!! The kids were going NUTZ (some were too nutz). 1,500+ packed people just responsive to every drop, tune, rhyme. Even when the sound had to go down for a bit (Fire Marshall said the event was over capacity [in between all 3 areas] so they had to handle the situation). Anyways even with that situation the crowd/atmosphere was unbelivable! Next up was ADAM F and if Aphrodite destoryed the place then Adam F rebombed it! Absolutely smashed it!! By this time it was 2:30am and it seemed like more people somehow got in that huge arena. Adam F was killing it. My favorite part was him switching to breaks. Man the kids were going crazy (i also love switching up the mcn'). Anyways by 4am the place was still packed, but as with all good things the nite came to an end. This nite was out of control!! The people, the crowd, the tunes, the hospitality of my TX homies and the crazies in the crowd...loosing my voice and sounding like a frog now was totally worth it.

13) Giving myself a 50/50 chance of making my 11:45am flight the day after Meltdown (but made it)!! Being freakin' cracked out waiting for the plane but meeting one interesting character!! This guy was getting back to LA after 3 years of serving in Iraq (Marines). Me, him and Whizard just shot the shit for like 30-40 minutes waiting for the plane. Iraq is just a different world. I mean i am sure we all know that, but to hear it from someone after being there for 3 years is just crazy. I mean when he is like "yo you guys see that new phone 'The Razor'" or him just getting an iPod and seeing it as the crazy electronic toy ever...it was just crazy how much we take for granted. To hear that things like foot powder, wet wipes and toothpaste are like GOLD to soldiers, or how he was so happy to discover Starbucks or how great it was to take a shower at the airport for "10 hours" (so he said). One thing i also re-realized is that people are naturally good at heart. I know he was in a special situation (being a soldier back from Iraq), but seriously people were going out of their way to be kind to him, if not that just to show some sort of appreciation. Anyways the best part of his stories (ohh man wait him telling Whizard it is 155 degrees on the ground in Iraq . . . i nearly shit my pants . . . that is oven hot) was on his travels to Ukraine, Germany, Italy, Thailand, Prague and more. That dude had STORIES galore (the best being about his skills on the dancefloor and girls from like the middle east bumping Keith Sweat, haaahah). Ohhh man that dude was seriously THE SHIT!

14) So yeah that was a BRIEF synopsis of Texas...being back in LA was like time warped . .. i am poop'd. PICS AND MORE COMING SOON...

"hello this is Dr. Wheeler . . ."

*btw WHIZARD is the most hilarious person i know, ha!!! Props also Bastard Mike, Bridger, Mary, Titan, Brent Jones, Thomas Allen, Payton, Nmonic, Chris (and ur fiance), Jeffry, Adam F, Aphrodite and every other person i met along the line . . . "experience excellent" hope to do it again!!!