Ahoy hoy fellow Wankers! It's been awhile but I'm sure that this blog will be just as shitty as usual. Today I will be blogging about last night's excursion to the tropical North West of Bakersfield. The Hare, Excrementos, decided to treat us all to his inaugural solo haring. With promises of PBR, tropical sights, and roasted pig, the Bakersfield Hashers decided to show up (PBR is what we live for).
With the Hashers decked out in our finest tropical/Hawaiian garb, Excrementos started the run on a promising note. There was to be 3 beer checks, views of lava, sand, and exotic animals. Little did we know that we would be so disappointed.
After a couple laps through the local neighborhood and a shiggy laden "lava field" the hashers were greeted with their first BN. In the distance was seen a large pile of dirt/sand. Did the Hare dare plant the sweet ambrosia of PBR amongst the heaps of soil and pass it off as sand dunes? Yes he did, and yes we still enjoyed ourselves (beer will do that).
Off we were to find the next allotment of Barley Pop. Before the drinking was to commence, the hashers were treated to some exotic animals in the form of "Maui Cowies".
Shortly thereafter, the Hashers were treated to their second BN located next to a supposed Sandy Beach (a.k.a abandoned lot). To our chagrin, no beer was located anywhere near the beach. With thirst in our throats and hate in our hearts, the hashers left that place of distress in search of our beloved liquid bread. In the distance a third BN was found and this time we were rewarded with the beautiful sight of the beer wagon.
Come to find out, Cum Pond W and Diablower were not as competent as Excrementos had hoped. They were unaware of their blunder of not making it to the second beer check. Rarely has a cold shitty beer tasted so good. With the proper apportioning of the ol' suds, the Hashers were able to make it back to the A for a backyard barbeque.
Making our way to the backyard of Excrementos, the hashers were delighted in finding a wicked cool pool and a very friendly dog. With some ball busting cannon balls and general pool shenanigans, we were ready for the down down circle. There were plenty of regular crimes and nothing too noteworthy. The On-After though was. Excrementos delivered on his promises of good food and drink. An amazingly well smoked pig butt and some salmon left the Hashers full, fat and the Mai Tai's left us sassy. The debacle of the second beer check could have ruined the entire run, but Excrementos was able to save his inceptive hash trail.
Next week we have Butt Hook's golf run to look forward to.
On On Wankers