The Hormone Hostage:

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant other!


DANGEROUS:
1.What's for dinner?                                           

2.Are you wearing that?

3.What are you so worked up about?

4.Should you be eating that?

5.What did you DO all day?
SAFER:
1.Can I help you with dinner?
2.Wow, you sure look good in brown?
3.Could we be overreacting?
4.You know, there are a lot of apples left.
5.I hope you didn't over-do it today.
SAFEST:
1.Where would you like to go for dinner?
2.WOW! Look at you.
3.Here's my paycheck.
4.Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
5.I've always lover you in the robe!
ULTRA SAFE:
1.Here have some chocolate.
2.Here have some chocolate.
3.Here have some chocolate.
4.Here have some chocolate.
5.Here have some more chocolate.

13 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweat pants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one.
13. Potential Murder Suspect

Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh!
...Or men who need a warning.

And remember: Money talks .... but Chocolate SINGS!!!