Hey troops,

Wow, here we are in August already.  2009 is flying by!

Over the last couple weeks, I managed to see six, count ‘em, six films in the cinema, as well as catching up with some Oscar bait from recent years.  And, of course, a return to a bygone era when Conan was a muscle-bound warrior as opposed to a stick-thin talk show host.

As always, feel free to leave your two cents worth – we’ll make sure you get some change back.

Enjoy!

Horror:
Collector, The (2009) (1st viewing)
Desperate to repay a debt, an ex-con (Josh Stewart) plots a heist at his new employer’s country home, unaware that someone else has already targeted the property, and rigged it with a series of deadly traps.  The biggest problem with this directing debut from Marcus Dunstan (one half of the writing team behind the Feast series, as well as the last three Saw sequels – Patrick Melton being his co-scribe, as he is here) is that it could have been an enjoyably silly, gore-filled romp, filled with implausible contraptions and paper-thin characters.  But Dunstan's tone throughout is deadly serious, presumably expecting viewers to actually emotionally invest in the bevy of ludicrous (and highly sadistic) booby-trap filled scenarios best described as “Home Alone meets Hostel.”  Our Faceless Villain has no personality, no motivation, nothing to distinguish him from any other masked killer…which may be the point.  Meanwhile, Brandon Cox’s slick, faux-gritty cinematography (in vogue since the 2003 Texas Chainsaw remake) and Jerome Dillion’s astonishingly busy soundscape only amplify the sensation of watching artisans who have learned their craft in the Hollywood machine – all sound and fury with no vision or individuality, just a desire to serve up whatever sells tickets.  Is this is what today’s horror fans really want?  Now, that’s scary.

Hell High (1989) (1st viewing)

This twisted little late ’80s entry combines elements of both the slasher movie and the rape-revenge film.  A group of high school delinquents decide to harass their notoriously frosty biology teacher, oblivious to the fact that as a child she accidentally caused the death of two teenagers and has been a bit unhinged ever since.  They terrorize her, sling mud at her house, drug her, abuse her, and eventually cause her to jump out of a window.  While they’re busy trying to cover up the crime, they discover she’s not dead…and very upset indeed.  The acting is decidedly on the low end and while there are smatterings of female boob shots, one gets the impression that it might have all been performed by the same body double, since we never seen anyone’s face in the frame!   The script by one-off director Douglas Grossman and Leo Evans provides very little in the way of motivation for anyone’s behavior, but serves up plenty of unintentional laughs along the way (the football game “prank” is so lame it’s almost brilliant). 

Orphan (2009) (1st viewing)

“There’s something wrong with Esther,” runs the tagline of this ambitious “killer kid” movie, which is certainly truth in advertising.  A couple (Peter Sarsgaard, Vera Farmiga) that has recently lost a child adopts a 9-year-old girl (Isabelle Fuhrman) who then proceeds to surreptitiously dominate their entire household.  The acting is excellent across the board, with Farmiga returning to terror tyke territory (a mere two years after her worthier-than-the-film-itself turn in 2007’s Joshua) to deliver an admirably layered performance that adds much-needed integrity to some occasionally dicey plotting.  Sarsgaard also does well in his role (with the exception of a late-in-the-day drunk scene which, in his defense, is so bonkers Brando couldn’t have pulled it off).  David Johnson’s script tightly packs a lot of curves and valleys, but could have benefited from more separation between the suspenseful set-ups and their payoffs – oftentimes character information is revealed with the results played out in the scene immediate following.  However, his third-act reveal regarding Fuhrman and her background is a doozy, and buys a lot of good will.  Director Jaume Collet-Sera, who helmed the surprisingly enjoyable (and enjoyably nasty) House of Wax in 2005, likewise delivers several graphic scenes of violence that might catch audiences off guard with their viciousness, and though the film clocks in at over two hours (!), the pacing rarely flags.  Ultimately, it’s a worthy entry in the “Bad Seed” subgenre, provided you’ve brought plenty of suspension of disbelief (and gone to the bathroom beforehand).

Wendigo (2001) (2nd viewing)

Independent NYC director Larry Fessenden follows up his celebrated modern vampire film, Habit, by again portraying real people dealing with unreal circumstances.  En route to a cabin in the Catskills, a well-off urban couple (Jake Weber, Patricia Clarkson) accidentally hits a deer in the road.  They are soon confronted by a group of hunters, the leader of which (John Speredakos) harbors a deeply felt grudge against outsiders and proceeds to antagonize them during their wintry stay.  Meanwhile, the couple’s son (Erik Per Sullivan) meets a Native American ghost who tells him the story of the Wendigo, a mythical beast that protects the forest. Fessenden’s skill as a writer of authentic characters is immediately apparent, as the dialogue between the family members – as well as their antagonists – is sharp and believable.  Likewise, the palpable sense of dread derived from mundane events and locations results an atmosphere that is at once recognizable and foreign, all the while utilizing ordinary cinematic techniques such as time-lapse photography and still-shot editing (as well as one memorable Matrix-like “bullet-time” sequence).   The one place where Fessenden’s low-budget seams unfortunately show is when he puts his monster front and center onscreen, since his deer/man creation is more likely to inspire snickers than shivers.  Even so, this is a complex, intriguing tale about the time-honored clash between city and rural, with the mythological bent lending it a unique flavor.   

Civilian Mini-Views:
Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford, The (2007) (1st viewing)
Beautifully shot and mounted…with some serious pacing issues.  All the actors (including Brad Pitt, Casey Affleck, Sam Rockwell, Jeremy Renner and Sam Shepard) are fine, but no one seems to be in a big hurry to do much of anything.  Ever.

Atonement (2007) (1st viewing)
Bravura camerawork, sharp screenplay and terrific performances elevate what could have been a sudsy soap opera into something more.  Did it deserve all those Oscar nominations?  Maybe not, but I’m not going to hold a grudge against them.

Conan the Barbarian (1982) (2nd viewing)

“What is best in life?”  “To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women.”  Hells, yeah.  Basil Pouledouris’ musical score is as muscular and twice as deep as Ah-nuld in his big breakout starring role.  Great, goofy stuff that inspired a wealth of early ’80s imitators.

Finding Neverland (2004) (1st viewing)

Johnny Depp turns in a lovely performance as J.M. Barrie, inspired by ailing Kate Winslet’s brood of spirited moppets to write the tale of Peter Pan.  A little on the sentimental side at times, but not overly syrupy. 

Frida (2002) (1st viewing)

Salma Hayek delivers a memorable star turn as the fiery Mexican artist Frida Kahlo, leaving vanity (and often her clothes) behind in service of the story and character.  Director Julie Taymor (Broadway’s The Lion King) mixes dizzying fantasy visual with clean, emotionally truthful scenes.

Hurt Locker, The (2008) (1st viewing)
An elite U.S. military bomb-defusing unit stationed in Iraq faces death every day in a variety of forms – this alone would make for fascinating cinema.  But director Kathryn Bigelow also examines the subtle shades of brotherhood and loyalty, as well as the diverse methods of coping with fear and trauma, resulting in a brilliantly textured film that deserves all its kudos.

Perfect Getaway, A (2009) (1st viewing)
Inexplicably receiving a theatrical release, this cornball thriller has “straight-to-DVD” written all over it, and I mean that in the best way.  A couple honeymooning in Hawaii begins to suspect that they are being stalked by a vicious pair of psychopaths, with writer/director David Twohy unveiling gorgeous scenery, enjoyable action sequences, zippy dialogue…all wrapped in one seriously boneheaded plot.  Luckily, his seasoned and game cast (Timothy Olyphant, Steve Zahn and Milla Jovovich among them) are clearly enjoying themselves, and silly as it all is, no one ever asks to be taken too seriously, so it almost kinda works.  Still a renter, though.

Film Noir Double Feature (courtesy of Chicago’s Music Box):
Double Indemnity (1944) (3rd viewing)

Billy Wilder (who also directed) and Raymond Chandler adapt James M. Cain’s novel into a firecracker script filled with endlessly quotable lines, ever more so when spoken from the lips of the estimable trio of Fred MacMurry, Barbara Stanwyck and Edward G. Robinson.  A classic that deserves its reputation, still entertaining audiences 65 years later.

Prowler, The (1951) (1st viewing)

Patrol cop Van Heflin becomes infatuated with married woman Evelyn Keyes, eventually plotting to murder her husband and claim her himself.  Directed by Joseph Losey, this is hard boiled stuff, notable in particular for Heflin’s completely irredeemable characterization – whining, sulking and bullying his way through the entire picture – while still retaining a modicum of audience sympathy. 

2009 Totals: 279 films, 193 1st time views, 145 horror, 21 cinema