So, if you haven't heard by now, I am going to be a father. I have taken my vows for the lord.

not really. I did it with a woman and through the magic of super sperm, I have impregnated my wife. Which is actually really surprising because I thought I would've totally messed up long ago and have been a young father. However, the flaw in that is that I never got laid when I was young. So, someone was looking out for me.

fatherhood. that's a big word. three syllables. broken down into three words.. FAT...HER...HOOD. Read into that what you will. seriously though, right now... I feel good. Not scared. I'm actually more scared that my kid will be better at call of duty 4 than I am by the time they turn 5 months. Still, I don't think I'll get scared until she starts showing. At which point I'll be amazed that she's growing, what is essentially a giant sea-monkey in her belly.

how will i be as a father? i dunno. my father raised me up pretty strict... as is displayed by the fact that I am an absolute lazy ass nowadays. My father....well... in the latter part of my life he taught me not to be like him. He taught me, "don't rob the 7-11, rob the bank." He taught me right from wrong. Do as he says, not as he does. I think he gave me a pretty solid set of core values (i.e. don't mix vodka with sunny delight, looks like jizz & orange juice) that I think I can pass on to my child.

I'll have to play it by ear. Anybody know of a good smell blocker for changing diapers? I'm pretty sure my reaction to my first diaper change will be the same reaction I gave when I watched 2 girls 2 cup.

Storm's a brewing... potential power outtage. I'm out.