... and I can honestly say that I am so through with this man and this marriage that I wish I had a big fast forward button so that I could make the time go quicker!  He makes it so.  I can't stand the begging, and the pleading and the utter bullshit that comes out of him.  20 years together, and do you think this man will give me the truth?  Not even if his life depended on it.  The truth is really the only thing that would make me reconsider divorce, and it would have to be a pretty darned impressive truth, complete with names, dates, times.  Even so, I might be so disgusted that I run away, but the truth of the matter is, I'm tired.  I'm just so tired of dealing with him that it's not even funny.  I haven't looked at his face head-on in a couple of years, he disgusts me that much.  Hearing that he actually did fuck The Troll just sent that disgust into downright revulsion.

I think he's finally getting that there's no turning back, and there's not going to be a miraculous reconciliation.  I look forward to splitting our assets down the middle.  I can't wait to get my great big chunk of change and go back to school.  I'm not looking forward to dating -- ugh!  Having been with one man my entire life, however, I am curious.

Ah well.  Time to clean off my desk and get ready for some fish tacos and my dee-vorce 'do!