TOUR RECAP

---- -----

Got back from the big tour yesterday, I'm still exhausted. To paraphrase Danny Glover in Lethal Weapon, "I'm getting too old for this shit." Still, I'll do it any time we can. It's not easy for a little regional band to scrape together a tour that actually almost breaks even. It's far from glamorous and fun as hell.

HUGE thanks to everybody who helped pull it off. As the old saying goes, it takes a village to make a quixotic tour moderate successful. Primarily, Shay, Pam and Demetri. To not thank them in every paragraph is ridiculous.

But also thanks to many others: my mom, Matt, Carrie; Mike, Jen, Pete in LA; Susie & Adam in SF; Josh, Brad and Kathy (still drunk) in OR and all of the bookers, bartenders and fellow musicians in every spot. Everybody couldn't have been nicer, which is a real change of pace from musicians getting abused in San Diego.

Perhaps I'll write a real account of the tour later, but here are some awards and shout outs.

COOLEST GIG

Anderson's General Store, Guemes Island, WA

Playing outside on a tiny island to enthusiastic crowd on a moonlight night & what truly felt like the last night of summer was unforgettable. It's an island off that requires a wacky ferry ride from Anacortes, features dogs running free, questionable police jurisdiction and super friendly owner, bartenders, cooks and patrons. Every band that has never had an experience like this one should be jealous: who knew as a band you could be paid well, treated well, sell CDs, find new fans, and have folks really wanting more after seeing you for 3 hours.

WORST GIG

Element, Oak Harbor, WA

Let me put it this way, when the guy who books you is still speculating a couple of days before if Jim can find a speaker or a microphone for the club, turn and run. My mom (who lives in this town) warned me about it. Mom knew best.

THE NEW GUY

Demetri Enriquez on bass in Portland

What a treat. Demetri was up for this from day one and it couldn't have worked out better. Find him and befriend him if you're on Bigfellas MySpace or Charlie's Facebook. He's good people.

DRUNKEST

Sam Bond's Garage, Eugene OR

Is it a bad sign when everybody thinks the other person is the designated driver? Pam was drunk hours before the gig. Shay and Charlie swilling Jameson's before the show, different patrons sending back jumbo shots of questionable tequila to the stage ... and ended up being arguably our best playing onstage. With all of that, Shay, Pam and Charlie didn't crack the top 2 of drunkest in our group. Demetri and Kathy were BOMBED. (Kathy flew up from Ashland for this - you rock!) Over bloody marys in bar early the next AM, Demetri found another barfly to drive him from Eugene back to Portland that afternoon. Meanwhile, the rest of us slept in cars at the gig, tried to drive a little, then slept at rest stop before dawn drive back to Portland. I swear to God, I've developed a relapsing case of vertigo ever since this night/morning.

DRUNKEST (Runner-Up)

Manager at Shanachie Pub, Willits CA

Shaun and I had a little Bigfellas reunion show and we kept getting paid in drinks, but even trying hard to capitalize on that left us way behind the manager in booziness (she was also pretty hot, but too thin to hold her liquor). She was so drunk that Pam seemed relatively sober in Eugene just 48 hours before.

THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T DO WHILE ON TOUR (tie)

Help a friend move ...

Shay's moving experience from San Diego to Portland is a whole other saga that cannot be told in brief; just a near-unbelievable tale of professional scam artists posing as a moving company. It's a nightmare and at least Shay has most of his stuff at this point. It doesn't help to be in the middle of a music tour (loading, driving, unloading, playing, drinking, unloading ... repeat each day) then have to unload a moving truck.

Continue working ...

In that every day schedule of driving, loading, playing, drinking, etc. throw in the concept of still working your job on the computer, writing code, forming documents and emailing during the day to continue making a living. I know in this economy I shouldn't complain about having an income and the flexibility to do it while I travel ... but I'm officially complaining. Two weeks of this whole schedule pretty much ruined me; everything below the waist is KAPUT!

BEST FOOD

Pot Stickers at Genghis Cohen, Los Angeles CA

My friends and I all agree that Genghis Cohen's old school Chinese food is best in southern CA. Their pot stickers might crack my top 5 of best appetizers anywhere. It really is a fun place to play, once described as "a cross between a church and a Chinese brothel during the Gold Rush."

BEST FOOD DISCOVERY

Biscuits, gravy, bacon at Pine State Bakery, Portland OR

My credentials as a bacon aficionado are unquestioned. My two favorite bacons of the year are from Milton's in Del Mar and the bacon on these McMuffin type lovelies. Demetri turned me on to this one. When in Portland, get over there in the Southeast. Yes, Portland people move slower than even San Diego people, but it's worth the wait.

BEST DRUG DISCOVERY

Flexeril

With a really tight back and sleeping on some couches and unfamiliar beds, you couldn't draw up a better drug than Flexeril. Normally it just loosens some muscles perfectly. Taken with a few drinks (I'm officially not condoning this and not responsible for your experience) it's the greatest thing I could do on tour. After 1 great Flexy night in SF, I slept in and woke up in a Flexy fog, walking around the Mission District with my iPod and every song sounded sublime.

WHAT AM I DOING MOMENT I

C&P Coffee, West Seattle WA

For those of you booking a tour, try not to go too far out of your way to play a coffeehouse … at least at 6pm. With no native crowd hanging out, just random parents and dogs once in a while, you'll feel pretty ridiculous that this is a part of a "tour", no matter how nice the few people there are. When you're more concerned with not annoying the guy on the laptop than your performance, you need a better booking agent. (I wish I could fire myself from that job.)

WHAT AM I DOING MOMENT II

Hung-over in Portland after Eugene show

I slept about 30 minutes in the morning on Shay's floor amidst moving boxes for a grand total of about 2 hours of sleep that night. Somehow simultaneously drunk, hungover and dizzy, about to have solo shows the next 3 nights in cities each about 300 miles apart and just weary to my soul. This was the spiritual moment of doubt about touring. What's the point? Why don't I have a bed? Why did I have tequila? Why do we try so hard to play music? Is it some weird addiction? An affliction? I miss my DVR. These are the real grind-it-out moments of a tour that separate the dilettantes from the professionals. I think I'm just short of being a pro, but god damn if I didn't find my work ethic. Shay too, he's a trouper in every sense of the word.

DUMBEST LOAD-IN

Ghirardelli Square Chocolate Festival, San Francisco, CA

I opened the festival at Noon on a drizzly Saturday, the last of my 15 days on the tour and was so tired that I wasn't brooking any nonsense. Unfortunately, nonsense I got with the most idiotic parking, load-in set up behind the stage. There’s nothing like playing and singing with staff wanting you to move your car within 10 seconds "or else". I don't want to give a bad impression of the show - it was fun, people were nice and families listening were very pleasant. But the prospect of me being delayed by the car getting hemmed in for even 30 seconds after I was done had become a nightmare thought at the end of 15 days. I think I wrapped up "Moving Day" at the end of a two-hour show in mid-chorus with a clearly audible "Fuck it, I'll move the car myself. Thanks, people - enjoy the next act!" It was the low-rent equivalent of Van Morrison throwing his mike on the ground and walking away in the middle of "Cypress Avenue" (which he's apparently done often).

REUNIONS ALONG THE WAY

One of the really cool things is to see old friends along the way. What a bonus. Mike, Jen and Pete in LA is no brainer. Staying with Susie and Adam and getting QT in SF. Seeing Josh for 2nd time in 15 years in Portland. Rob in Seattle before the show. Seeing Shaun & Sara's place in Arcata and playing with Shaun while soaking up Sue & Tim's hospitality in Willits. Brad coming down from the mountains to Twin Paradox coffeehouse in Portland. Catching Andy & Val & family in Fresno. All of that stuff is what it's all about. Playing solo in a vacuum on a tour would be a horrible grind. Getting to spend time with old friends in new places makes it all 180 degrees better. Then also getting to recharge the batteries for a couple of days up at my mom's house on Whidbey Island north of Seattle was essential, with a bonus of being around for my aunt's birthday. Catching a movie, eating ribs, and getting in some family QT amidst a rock n' roll tour is really shooting the moon.

SOUTHERN CA vs. THE REST OF THE MUSIC LOVING WORLD

I shouldn't rag on San Diego too hard, but I've really come to the conclusion that music generally blows here. Too many bands and clubs putting all marketing onus on the bands makes San Diego truly pitiful musically. There just is no scene to speak of. Our Guemes Island experience and playing at colleges is better than 99% of San Diego gigs. I didn't know soundmen were friendly before? Didn't know that other musicians actually stay and watch your act without acting like bitchy magpies. Didn't know a city (Portland) could have a "sound" where songwriting and banjos are encouraged. Didn't know a city (Seattle) could feature friendly musicians.

THE FAN I WANTED TO PUNCH

Crazy lady at Piecora's, Seattle WA

OK, I really wasn't gonna punch her. I'm about 90% sure of that. She was clearly mentally ill. But why do crazy people always get a pass? When a band is playing, is it normal to stand 9 inches in front of singer during a show asking stupid questions while he's singing? We later found out that she took a dump in the middle of the parking lot. By the way, the load in through the Italian restaurant backroom and kitchen at Piecora's was just like that long single-camera shot in Goodfellas ... except we each had to make 5-6 trips during the rain to get all the gear in. For those of you who don't play in a band, just please consider how the band has to get their gear where you're seeing them play before you think $10 is too high a price for their CD.

WORST LISTENING & VIEWING ALONG THE WAY
Radio
Demetri and I heard some Canadian schtick on CBC up north about rap that set Canada and comedy back several years. Honestly, this crap made NPR seem edgy.
TV
Whitney Houston's return and live appearance on Good Morning America was putrid. Even more embarrassing than being on crack needing to take a dootie on Being Bobby Brown.

CHILDREN ARE OUR FUTURE, YIKES

Pacific University, OR

I know it's a tiny school and freshman orientation week but these kids don't have a prayer in the real world. Have they spent their first 18 years in an incubator? I've never seen more disoriented, confused, zombie-looking kids in my life. But you know what? We are playing at that school any chance we get. The worst college audience is better than just about all other audiences.

NUTTIEST LITTLE SHOW

Black Cat Bar, Penngrove CA

Playing solo still doesn't feel natural for me. And with a solo act that's really the destitute man's Randy Newman, Ben Folds or Warren Zevon, it's funny to find yourself at what looks like a shit-kicking bar in Nowheretown U.S.A. The shocker to this one is that this rural watering hole with old-timey slogans and bar signs all around turns out to be a lesbian hotspot and plenty of great white wine. I caught them on a Sunday night so not tons of folks there but everybody was SO nice there it was unbelievable. I'm dedicating myself to playing there every time I come through with a piano.

OVERALL

Seriously, for the 2 rude door people and 2 dopey engineers we had on the whole trip, we had about 20 great bartenders, 8 great owners/managers, 6 great soundmen, free booze, free food, 100+ nice folks talk to us after shows, new fans, some CD sales, mailing list signups and enough good vibes to want to keep hitting this circuit in the future. Yes, it really is hard work, but completely worth it to get out there in the world.

LAST KUDOS

My car, "Don Diego" (aka "Donnie"), Ford Explorer

Donnie held together like a champ. Logged 3600 miles with a packed car, had room for Demetri and gear in Northwest, decent mileage, A/C, and played music and podcasts the whole way. Thank heaven the jerk at smog check place fucked up "Murph" (my Audi) the day before I started on tour ... Donnie was the way to go.

Thanks again, everybody. Bigfellas will be back soon, we promise.