Belief in thyself is the ultimate power. It emanates through airwaves, skin cells, eye brows, actions and verbage. The lack thereof does just the same.
For most of my life I didn't really understand the concept of a hero. I didn't really think I believed in them, well, because, I generally believe in everyone. I learn as I go, absorb every waft of concept...so I didn't sense that I should dare give anyone in particular a super vote of emulation. Just in the last few years, I have realized how much I DO create heroes and that I do indeed, deeply decorate certain individuals. Currently, I am happy and proud to look toward others. I am happy to do so in honor of maintaining belief in my true self.
In this thought driven night of sleeplessness, I spent some more time with John Waters. It hit me very sharply that I wish I could be at least a bit more like him. In the way that he is so comfortable with the dirty filthy world and yet still maintains limits and morals. Too often I feed into normalcy. I worry I may offend someone, turn them off, make them think twice about me or heaven forbid, lose their support. But all in all, I do tend to be myself, and believe in myself in spite of dibilitant insecurity.
Waters is a doer. Or at least, that's how he comes off. I doubt that he spends relentless hours in the stew of perfectionism, but instead just HAS an instinct and then ~ blamo ~ he does it. I wanna be more like that~!
I do so dearly love being depraved...but equally so, I love being altruistic.
So, tonight I embrace self acceptance while I water my garden of exotic seeds. Thanks for your inspiration John!