In one of those frequent and satisfying conjunctions created by the all-seeing eye of Google, a pair of strange bedfellows is discovered by searching the term 'glory bumps'. Revealed thereby is an unexpected affiliation  between the heaving multitude of Rapture-bound Christian Fundamentalists and the more modest constituency of the Barking and Dagenham BMX bike riders club.

 Gentle MySpace readers, it goes down thuswise:

The 'glory bumps' as understood by the Born Again are, as you may know, goose bumps provoked on a Believer's skin by the thought that the level of human misery prevailing in the world at any point presages their abrupt assimilation into the bosom of their Lord ('I tellya, I'm feeling the glory bumps, right now' -if you dont believe me have a look at the 'Rapture Index', it's a trip).

The BMX bikers of Essex, however, enjoy a less exalted, though, you may well feel, more wholesome pleasure in energetically riding their bikes over some undulations on Dartford Heath known as -yes -'the Glory Bumps'. These hillocks were, incidentally, created in WW1 for the concealment of military vehicles, so I guess there's a tenuous link.

That the moral high ground (as well as that of Dartford Heath, ho ho) is a terrain belonging righteously to the BMX club is, I assert, evidenced by their recent bulletin advising members to exercise caution in their sport on account of elderly people walking dogs.

While my enthusiasm for cycling acrobatics is, to say the least, mild, the charm and kindliness of that message alone convinces me that it would be the good people of the Dagenham and Barking Chapter, rather than the more numerous Hordes of Righteousness (their flesh fizzing with pimples at every new war and earthquake) who I would prefer to spend Eternity with.

Since you ask, Shriekback and our new album.. err "Glory Bumps' is the only other interest group Google identify and we're not until page 4.

There is much to be done.