how much control are we in control of? do we bend and push our will into the nether hoping that somewhere, somehow we are controlling something so we feel less controlled? And when the moment comes when your destiny is no longer yours to control, what do you do? Do you show your ass in act of defiance? Do you lash out like a child? Do you crawl under the bed and wait for the powers that think they be, to project your destiny in the direction they see fit? I know what I do.. I debate my options, then I show my ass like no ass has been shown before and then I destroy and mangle the offending party. Yesterday I learned that when backed into a corner I am just as evil at 32 as I was at 18. I can be just as back biting and conniving as my worst enemy when attacked. I have no fantasy of survival either, just to take as many people down with me as I can. My lips calculate and measure every syllable, each word weighed and examined like a general and his troops. Like a wordsmith ninja, within moments I had made someone appear to their peers as weak and incompetent with the stunning use of... flattery. Who does that? Apparently I do when my back is up. When I was 18 I would have thrown a chair at someone and stole the radiator fan off their car. It seems as I have gotten older I just beat people down with a idiom and a carefully placed sarcastic euphemism.

The concerning thing is, this was the best day I have had at work since I got here.