I wonder about that from time to time. About my legacy. When people ask me about my mom or dad, I have a few things I say that I hope captures their essence:
"So what was your mom like?" They ask
"She was a firecracker--an amazing sense of humor, kind and a tremendous cook."
My dad's a little harder. He's more complex, so I stick to generalities with him:
"Dad was awesome. He loved us."
Even in the movie, Sleepless in Seattle, there was a 3-second legacy speech:
"Your mom could peel an apple in one, long, curly strip..."
That's a lot of pressure, coming up with that 3-second pitch for a legacy, so I thought I'd take some of the pressure off of my kids by giving them some ideas about what they could say about me after I'm gone.
"My mom had her way with words. Of course, the words resisted."
"Mom made enemies as readily as she did friends. She even had a couple of stalkers! It was cool."
"Mom was a snappy dresser and an avid virtual bowler."
"My mom could scowl like a sailor and swear like a nun."
"My mom was so funny....but looks aside..."
"Mom always knew when to listen, and when to close the door while we were in mid-sentence."
"My mom could microwave a burrito so that there were no frozen parts, and yet, it wasn't hard on one side."
"My mom liked to keep a clean house. But then she'd give it away to the dust mites."
"My mother was so goofy, she'd sit for hours at the computer writing in a "book". Ha ha ha!"
"Mom liked to play with paints. We're still trying to figure out what to do with all of her art; all 1,072 pieces. Wanna take a look-see?"
"Mom's facial expressions could say it all. Her mouth usually over-rode it though."
"You never got in mom's way. Especially before the Lasik surgery."
"Mom was hilarious behind the wheel. Then they invented the whole car, and it just got scary."
"Mom knew how to cook. At least this is what she told us."
"My mom could make anything funny. Funerals were a real bitch."
"Mom was generous and kind to everyone--on her blog. In person? Notsomuch."
"Mom was great with children. Of course this was also on her blog."
"My mother made the party lively. Still trying to live that down."
"Mom could make cookies like no one else. Just ask the NHL."
These are only a few suggestion for that awkward time when they have to capture my essence in a nutshell. I hope, somewhere in there, they say "She loved us." That's the one I hope they don't miss.
Chowder