**War sucks.

**You CAN have too many women.

**Smart people wear glasses.

**Music foreshadows plot.

**The less you care about sex, the more opportunities you'll get.

**(Inversely, the harder you try, the less you'll get.)

**When you die, make a long speech, and don't finish the last sentence.

**Snow means love.

**The best teams come in fives.

**In space, you can hear everything.

**There's always room for flashbacks!

**When in China, listen to your tour guide.

**The good guy always has the BLUE glow.

**Speak quietly, pilot a big mech.

**Believe in goddesses.

**Teachers have excellent aim with small objects.

**Vengeance with a mallet is the sweetest revenge of all.

**Honor is sexy; villainy is irresistible.

**Women are attracted to losers; men are attracted to ANYTHING.

**The coolest weapon is still the sword.

**The hero is never really mad until they hurt his girlfriend.

**Female androids are sexy; male androids are....male androids.

**The green-haired alien girl will always betray her people for the man she loves.

**School uniforms are cool only when the collar is open.

**A show without sexual tension isn't worth watching.

**Love knows no race, species, or logic.

**If it's homemade but tastes bad, grin and bury it (discreetly).

**Never trust a huge corporation.

**Romance never comes simpler than in a triangle.

**Never fall for the girl who names her mech with a French name.

**Never fall in love with a psychic.

**You can never have too much hair.

**Sweating is a sure sign of stress.

**Daydreaming leads to accidents.

**Everyone wants to conquer Japan.

**The cute, fuzzy creature isn't what it seems.

**Cherry blossoms mean nostalgia.

**Always take gravity into account.

**Settings and faces are self-generating.

**Losing your temper can be therapeutic.

**There's nothing sexier than high heels on a mech.

**You can never have too many subplots.

**If she sings, she's doomed.

**You always remember the sad endings.

**Double suicide is romantic.

**Outrageous vehicles only make the hero cooler.

**Nothing delays romance like unruly neighbors.

**Fancy ice cream is for girls only.

**The most virtuous character will die.

**Hot water has innumerable benefits.

**No matter how much blood is lost, no one can die by a nosebleed.

**(The same theory above applies to vomiting.)

**The girl with the curly hair is always the seductress.

**If a sister falls in love with her brother, somewhere down the line you will discover that they're not blood related.

**The guy in the baseball cap is always more powerful than he seems.

**All demons/monsters have enormous genitalia.

**All young children can pilot mecha, you just need to give them a few days.

**It is possible to incorporate martial arts into any aspect of life.

**All high school kids in Japan have parents that are away on extended business trips.

**The oldest sister is the nice one, the youngest sister is the brash one.

**You can do anything to the human body as long as you hit the right pressure point.

**Consuming enormous amounts of alcohol daily will never have ill effects.

**All major villains either want to take over the world or blow it up.

**When someone paints up their face, they mean business.

**Everyone in Japan has excellent singing voices.

**No matter how many times you rebuild, Tokyo keeps getting destroyed in a massive fireball.

**The martial arts expert is always defenseless against a slap from the girl who loves him.

**TAKAHASHI'S LAW 1: Food is a powerful motivator.

**When women are sent out to fight the bad guys, there's always a hunk busily watching over them, often in secret.

**The longer it takes to say what your punch is called, the less effective it is.

**"Baka" does not mean a student going for his baccalaureate degree.

**The more possessive a woman gets, the less likely she will end up with the man of her dreams.

**TAKAHASHI'S LAW 2: The two-foot-tall old geezer is someone to be feared.

**No matter how big the mech/labor/mobile suit is, if it runs around the corner, the guy chasing it loses the trail.

**Extraterrestrial, demons, time travelers, etc. all want to alter the course of history by letting Oda Nobunaga win.

**The fate of the planet rests in the hands of the seemingly normal high school student.

**The heroine must shred her clothes while transforming into something to fight the bad guys.

**True evil can never be destroyed, only banished to some nether realm where it awakes after a few hundred years.

**TAKAHASHI'S LAW 3: When being hit on the head, it's the most natural thing in the world to tuck your third and fourth fingers in while keeping the others extended.

**Even the bravest souls can be made weak and helpless by the sight of a cute little puppy or kitten.

**Never love a Gundam pilot : you're just destined for disappointment (or a funeral).

**All persons under the age of 50 can do a ten foot vertical jump from a standing position.

**Never trust a guy with shiny teeth

**ESP causes more trouble than it solves

**The vampire isn't _always_ the bad guy

**Nice things can come out of video stores that appear from nowhere

**Idiot captains win battles against impossible odds

**Order takeout at every opportunity--you might get lucky with a wrong number.

**The police are never anywhere there is a large amount of property damage.

**All high school principals in Japan are clinically insane.

**All people with esper powers give off multicolored auras.

**Just about any outer space villain has his sights set on destroying the Earth.

**(in conjunction with 92) No other planet in the universe will be able to stop said villain except the Earth.

**Any character can make a leap of 300 ft or more if given a good running start.

**A samurai sword can cut through anything.

**All characters over the age of 60 shrink in height in direct proportion to their age.

**When uncovering a fabulous treasure, the thing will be large enough to completely destroy any surrounding structures.

**TAKAHASHI'S LAW 4: An anti-climax is a good climax.

**Anime villians have the best deaths.

**Any love interest will always be possesed by a demon.

**Mallets can be stored anywhere on anybody.

**If the anime has the word "idol" in the title, then you know that it has to be good.

**Takada Yumi really does sing that bad, and people still buy her CDs.

**If you make enough porno movies, eventually you can get famous enough to star in commercials. "Iijima Ai desu! 'Manga manga no mori mori!!'"

**There is no such thing as a public anime showing without heckling.

**You can spot how popular a show is by looking at the number of H doujinshi it has.

**The smartest people on r.a.a. never post, which is why the conference's overall IQ is so low.

**If the lyrics to the OP song are printed on the screen, then you're watching a show that's not for your age group.

**The sexiest girls are drawn by artists whose last names start with "U".

**The English words in Jpop songs are put there only because they sound good, since they don't make any sense with the rest of the lyrics.

**If you post on the MLs more than Hitoshi does, then you probably post too much.

**The hero always loses the first fight with a new enemy.

**The guys with two earrings are from the Negaverse.

**Don't trust the guys with two earrings.

**Any truly evil person who changes sides for the woman he loves will die in that episode.

**You CAN do it, but only when it's funny or REALLY important.

**You can never have too many carrots.

**Hair comes in every shade of the rainbow - and we do mean pink, purple, blue, green....

**The song "Cry Me a River" takes on a whole new meaning.