the food pyramid...through the final days of my week of liquifying everything, i felt as if i wasn't fulfilling the requirements that this pyramid demands. so, for the finale of this horrible week of nauseating torture, i made the liquid meal to end all liquid meals.
see the food products shown above within that pyramid? a bit of each and every food product above was tossed into a blender for a battle royal with my tastebuds serving as the referee...and, well, in professional wrestling, battle royals are won when folks are tossed over the top rope. this particular battle royal had no winners, though...as every participant...every ingredient all got tossed from my stomach. it was a spectacular event that made me vomit....gave me shakes....and caused me to cringe so hard that i got a headache that hurt like a dang hoo-nanny...
the finale was absolutely spectacular....as i sat next to the toilet, i watched what seemed like a firework show splatter out of me...various colors....various shapes....what a celebration! a celebration for the week being over...and me being able to enjoy solid foods once again.
of course, once the clock hit midnight and my stomach had settled down from the awful mess i had consumed moments before, i grabbed a package of brownies and ate it all at once...which also made me a little ill....but oh, good golly, being ill from a bucket full of brownies is so, so worth it.
anyway, there's a lesson to be learned from the heck i put myself through during this week of liquifying everything...and i believe that lesson is that we need to make a bigger hole in the o-zone layer. the bigger the hole is, the hotter our planet will get....the hotter our planet gets, the more the water will evaporate. if the water evaporates, then the liquid on our planet will go away, too....and if our planet is that warm, then even if we blend something up into liquid, it'll evaporate into a potato chip or something. nobody will ever have to suffer through what i suffered through....ever.
...and i never ever want anyone else to suffer with what i suffered through. kill the ozone layer, friends. kill the ozone layer and give life to the flavors of solid food. yup.