For the month of July, I have a total of 5 or 6 shows. I'm basically doing one show every Saturday, I'm basically working as many shows a month before I took time off in the Summer of '06 and I'm sorta remembering why it was so hard before. I'm happy working all of these shows, don't get me wrong but there are certain aspects that make working these shows somewhat difficult. The two main things for me are Time and Personal Support.

Time: For most Saturdays, I'm busy the entire day or at least a good chunk of it. It's always hard telling someone that I can't make it to something because I have a show or a rehearsal or somewhere I gotta be and those friends either understand or get upset at me because they believe I'm blowing them off for something that I do for free/volunteer my time for or they believe what I'm doing won't get me anywhere. I mainly get that reaction from people who just don't get that I'm doing what I love doing, entertaining people and that I'm committed to both Rocky Horror and Pro Wrestling. It was my rule when I get involved in both things, to be committed as much as possible. In a way they're jobs, jobs that I get paid for in Thank you's and handshakes and smiles. Which to me, is a much better feeling than being handed a envelope with money or getting paid for my time. (Now every promoter is making a note of that, I'm sure. haha.)

Support: Everyone of my friends support what I do either in Pro Wrestling or Rocky or both, which I'm very great full for but I get the feeling they only support me mentally. I've been doing both Rocky Horror and Pro Wrestling for 4 years and barely anyone that I know from outside of Rocky or Wrestling has gone to a show that I've been apart of. Only a handful of people have gone to a show that I've been apart of both Rocky and Wrestling combined. Which is the main element of what makes working these shows hard on me. Now this isn't a "woe is Toby" thing, it's just an observation I've recently realized and I'm also not mad at my friends either, I understand at times people can just be busy as I can. I just think overall, I'd like more of my friends who've I've known before I got into Rocky or Wrestling or people I've met outside those areas to attend a show or two.

To me at least, working a show where I have a personal friend in the crowd makes the show a little more meaningful for me. Knowing after the show I can go up to said friend or friends and just ask them what they thought or getting their feedback and discussing the show further is something after a show I have looked forward to in the past. I also think it would help friends of mine understand why I'm doing this stuff so much to the point that most Saturdays I'm unavailable.

I think those two things are the toughest aspects of being the person I currently am right now. Maybe things will change over time, maybe they won't. Who knows. I do wish I had more time on my hands and more of my friends attended shows I'm doing on a regular basis but I'm also happy knowing what I have accomplished so far and the friends I've made being involved in both Rocky and Wrestling, many who I considers brothers and sisters who share the same passion, for the most part, that I have. It's a bumpy road, I just wished I had people who could help smooth the path a little bit, you know?