Walking my dog in the quickening Los Angeles dusk, crescent moon in the western sky, it occurred to me that September's almost over in a year that has flown by, partly because so much has happened: For me, it began in frigid Chicago, heading into the opening of PO BOY TANGO, enjoying a new city to which I would dearly love to return.
A little more than a month after coming back to LA, I went with my family and Sharon's family to Japan - the first time for me, second time for Rosie and Sharon: I don't believe I will ever be the same and again - I would dearly love to return.
A month later, my Grandma, who we moved down here to LA in December, 2006, passed away at 102 - it shouldn't have been a surprise, but of course, it was...and I still miss her. Preparations for her memorial consumed several weeks, and a couple of weeks after that, Rosie graduated from high school. A month after that, she turned eighteen. Less than two months after that, Rosie was off to college.
To quote Pico and Alvarado from the Firesign Theater, "Hoo boy, am I sleepy."
It's been three weeks since Rosie's been gone, and though Sharon and I have had some warning that the empty nest syndrome IS A BITCH, we're still pretty rocked. No one can really tell you what a mindblower that first pregnancy and childbirth is for mother OR father (I know, I know, fathers can't compete with mothers on either score, but trust me, it'll still blow your mind), and no one can really prepare you for the moment your child leaves home and you find yourself face to face with: The rest of your life.
Luckily, we anticipated this and I, who have a play in the hopper, planned a couple of readings for October with an eye towards production next spring so that we are guaranteed to say, "Whew, good thing we have extra time on our hands now", have made sure that we'll be hopefully too busy to notice how freaking sad we are that TIME GOES TOO DAMN FAST and no one tells you that when your child moves away, it's not unlike an amicable break up (you know, you both know it's for the best, and you're really glad that you can both get on with your lives, and there's some comfort knowing the other person misses you too, but DAMN!)
with someone you've been in love with for eighteen years: You keep thinking, "Oh, we used to go THERE." And, "I wonder what she's doing NOW." And "Oh, she would have loved THIS." And "I wonder if she's going to call tonight? Should I call? No, I shouldn't call, I should give her her space."
As the Rolling Stones used to say: "Love...it's a bitch."
So, what was I thinking of when I saw that crescent moon? Picking Rosie up from a day care center and seeing a full moon over the 101 south of what was then Candlestick Park, and hearing my two year-old poet say, "Moon! Moon, moon, moon, MOON! Moon PROUD. Moon PROUD."