Welcome back ma shizzel fo' nizzels! I know shut up, I'm too white for that. Anyways, we saw Snoop Dogg host RAW this week and all I can say is...So much for family friendly programming. Hey Eve, hand me my bag! Spark it! Lol!!
Well it'll be just the three of this this weekend, but we did manage to track down the fourth member to get his predictions for the Bragging Rights Pay-Per-View, which, doesn't seem to be a half bad looking card to be honest with you. And of course we have those at the end our little publication. But where is said fourth member you all are wondering. Well The Hitman is off this weekend, getting hitched! That's right he's getting married. So Sarge, The Game and Diva are wishing them all the happiness in the world and congratulations to you both. Drink lots of champagne for us and we will find a way to toast you wherever we will be. Cheers Hitman and MRS. Hitman!
***the views and opinions expressed in "Boot Camp" are strictly my own and do not in any way reflect those of WWE, TNA or any other group that I might inadvertently piss off! But....If you're gonna get all emo over it, then just run home to your mommy, curl up in the fetal position and cry salty tears into your fucking Ovaltine!!**
BOOT CAMP
Yo yo yo, peepz! As the Japanese always say, "Wassahipponin'?!!! Okay, maybe not "always", but they've gotta say something like that once in a while. Right? Come ON!!!
Anyway, I hope all my troopers have had a great week so far. Mine has been off the hook, Cole! Seriously. Monday was kind of ordinary and RAW didn't help me feel any better with all the Snoop Dogg crap that was left lying on the floor by the time the show was over. Then came Tuesday and that's when business REALLY picked up. You see, ever since about 11AM this past Tuesday, my life has been dominated by WWE SmackDown VS RAW 2010. In anticipation for the biblical proportions of sheer awesomeness that awaited me, I took all this past week off from work. I know that's a total geek move, and something only World of Warcraft nerds would normally do. Okay then! I'm a nerd. A SmackDown VS RAW geek! I'm not ashamed of it. I'm glad I took all that time off because I have been insanely busy with everything that's going on in that beast of a game. It's an unprecedented step forward from previous installments. Possibly the best of all SmackDown VS RAW games ever made! I'll buy that for a dollar.
Like any of you care about that. Moving along.....
First of all, I would like to talk for a minute about this week's ECW. Part of it, anyway. You all know I have expressed mixed feelings about Tiffany, the ECW General Manager. She has her flaws, but really, who doesn't? I have them. We all have them. What got my blood rushing this week was how she stood her ground and laid down the law in front of both Chris Jericho and William Regal. She was borderline bitchy, but her resolve was firm and she never backed down. It was.....HOT! I've always thought Tiffany was sexy as Hell anyway, but now, I have even more reason to drool.
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More from ECW....
Now for this week's "WTF Moment". Yoshi Tatsu is the new #1 contender for the ECW Championship! Ummm.....WHAT? That's got to be a typo. Wait. If it was a typo, why didn't I just go back and fix it? Could it be true? The guy with the goofiest fucking entrance music EVER is a main event player now? Wow.
What's worse is he beat Zack Ryder to claim that spot. Honestly, I'd rather see Zack Ryder in the #1 contender spot. Did I miss something? I know I haven't been the best at staying up to date on my ECW viewing the last few weeks, but how did Ryder get taken out of the title picture? Last I heard, he WAS the #1 contender. So....what the fuck happened, and why is Yoshi Tatsu taking his place? Of all people?
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A couple of funny things that happened during TNA this week.
I know this probably has nothing to do with anything, but I thought it was funny that a commercial for WWE SmackDown VS RAW 2010 was shown a couple of times during TNA Impact.
The other thing was the food fight between Taylor Wilde, Sarita and The Beautiful People. Yeah....a food fight. That's the fallout from Bound For Glory for these two teams? Really? Just one week after Hamada and Alissa Flash put on one of the most impressive women's matches I've ever seen, they pull out the bush league, WWE-esque shenanigans. People, leave the food fights to the SmackDown show during Thanksgiving week. TNA, you know you're better than that, and that's why I am shaking my finger at you!!
What ground-breaking events are on the horizon now? TNA's first-ever Pudding Match? God help us!
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Before I leave you this week, I want to talk about RAW for a bit. Not that I have anything bad to say, but I think you know me better than that by now. My attention span was drifting off in some weird direction on Monday night. Not more than 30 minutes into the show, and I had completely spaced what it was that brought Snoop Dogg to RAW. Diva and I were talking on MSN (like we do pretty much every Monday and Friday) and she had to remind me about Snoop's new CD that was coming out. THAT is why he was there!
I guess what threw me off was the scene where Snoop, Santino and the Bella Twins were all chillaxin' backstage and supposedly, there was some "smoking" going on. The actual act was censored out by a cheezy "technical difficulties" sign that was put up on the screen. When they came back to the show, Snoop was talking about candles. I honestly thought he was there to help sell the fucking candles....most likely scented to mask the smell of pot smoke in the air. A real Snoop-tastic product, fo shizzle, nizzles!
Aside from all that, the most we got out of Snoop's appearance as host of RAW was a few chances to see Nikki and Brie being sexy, but completely useless....and Santino being maybe even MORE useless...and a lot LESS sexy. I'm just sayin'!
Seems to be the running pattern of events every night we have a guest host. Santino gets to horse around backstage like a homeless flasher, and the Bella Twins have apparently received the blessing from Vince himself to do nothing but rub elbows with all the future guests hosts.
What ever happened to firing the dead weight on the roster? These three are long overdue. As much as I like Santino, he is getting really annoying and more than a little retarded lately. The Bella's are fun to look at (especially while playing in a hot tub!), but seriously...the rest of the Divas who actually DO SOMETHING each week have got to be pissed that those two more or less get the night off every Monday, but they still get paid like the rest of the Divas.
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Alright, people. I'm going to head out of here for now. For those of you watching Bragging Rights tonight, I hope you enjoy it. Even Diva said she thinks the card doesn't look all that bad for once. I'm still not getting it. The team has provided their predictions for the PPV this week, including yours truly. Feel free to laugh your ass off as my predictions go swirling straight down the old poop shoot!
You're welcome! .....and you're DISMISSED!!
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Had enough yet? You got something to say to me? E-mail me at darkside619@hotmail.com and get it off your flabby little chest! Your feedback is both welcomed and encouraged, and your responses will be highlighted in my next Boot Camp article. Your orders are clear, troops......it's time to stand up and sound off!! I'll make you famous! >:)
Until next time, this is The Sarge.....reminding you: Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.
Farewell Captain Lou and Shane
The Game
The sad news this week in the wrestling world Captain Lou Albano has died he passed away Tuesday and if that’s not enough Shane O Mac resigned his position with WWE as of January 1 2010 yesterday!! I mean Lou was a legend and death comes to all of us but Lou was a great man as talked about by many of his peers and well regarding the Shane situation it was talked about heavily in the locker rooms as of late and well some think by January 1 he will be working for TNA I believe this to be true I mean to stay a float and be a competitive organization you need a McMahon at the helm!!
Lou was 76 when he died and Shane who’s about 40 some are sayin he is at his mid life crisis point who knows this all could be one big storyline to gain the upper hand with the WWE these days you never know!! Captain Lou was a one of a kind personality who had a 40+ year career in the wrestling business as a wrestler and manager. The “manager of champions” guided 15 different tag teams and 4 singles competitors to championship gold. Along with Cyndi Lauper, Albano helped pioneer the Rock ‘n’ Wrestling movement during the 1980s that helped the WWF become a part of mainstream pop culture.
Upcoming RAW guest hosts include some NASCAR idiots and OZZY and well you know me well enough I'm gonna be skipping all the RAW's from now on until the OZ man cometh of course
What else is going on lately….
Chuck Liddell was eliminated from the Dancing with the Stars show last week which is well good because he needs to focus on his come back and I hope shut Tito the F up!!
Bound For Glory was from what I hear a great show I don’t really keep track unless Daffney or Raven are involved so hence why I don’t really give a shit about TNA however Daniels with that freaky bump from the Ultimate X match was brutal I haven’t seen video of this but again from what I was told OUCH!! Joe losing to Lesnar…oops I mean Lashley is complete bullshit!! Looking around for live results as the show went on I read claims of Lashley getting his ass booed but I dunno if TNA has the editing skills to edit out the boo’s like Kevin Dunn (Monkey in the truck)!!!
Lastly I wanna talk about this Ted DiBiase thing I mean yes for a good year maybe less Legacy has been dominate but hey you people know the WWE Films policy they have to start shoving Marine 2 down our throats because December 29 is not that far off and they need to make Ted a legit good guy and screwing Orton and therefore keeping Cena on RAW is quite the way to do it wouldn’t you say!! This all began on RAW when Ted and randy went 1 on 1 then the next Ted tried to help Randy and failed at it. Again I didn’t watch RAW the last 2 weeks so I could be wrong but look for Bragging Rights to be Ted’s time to shine!!
Adios
Game
Finally the last installment. Find out who number 1 is and who made the top 10. First off, your usual recap...
#50- Doug Williams (TNA) #49- Tommy Dreamer (WWE) #48- Dolph Ziggler (WWE) #47- Rob Terry (TNA) #46- Abyss (TNA) #45- Kane (WWE) #44- Jay Lethal (TNA) #43- Brutus Magnus (TNA) #42- Primo (WWE) #41- Chris Sabin (TNA)
#40- Rhino (TNA) #39- Alex Shelly (TNA) #38- Cody Rhodes (WWE) #37- Santino Marella (WWE) #36- James Storm (TNA) #35- Carlito (WWE) #34- Robert Roode (TNA) #33- Shawn Michaels (WWE) #32- Bobby Lashley (TNA) #31- Eric Young (TNA)
#30- Hernandez (TNA) #29- Ted DiBiase Jr (WWE) #28- David Hart Smith (WWE) #27- Homicide (TNA) #26- D'Angelo Dinero (TNA) #25- Shelton Benjamin (WWE)
#24- Finlay (WWE) #23- Hurricane Helms (WWE) #22- Tyson Kidd (WWE) #21- Matt Morgan (TNA) #20- John Cena (WWE) #19- Suicide (TNA) #18- Kurt Angle (TNA) #17- Rey Mysterio (WWE) #16- The Miz (WWE) #15- Christian (WWE)
And your top 14;
#14—The Undertaker (WWE/SmackDown—World Heavyweight Champion): I know what y'all are going to say, why is The Undertaker not in the top five? My reasons are this, I would be a bias party if I put the Deadman into the top five when he hasn't been around since April. He is one of the most decorated superstars in the business and deserves to be in the top 5, but when you're hardly around because of injuries, and personal life and what may have you, it's just not right to be given that direct privilege. He had probably one of the most amazing matches of his career against Shawn Michaels at WrestleMania 25 on April 5th of this year, proving that two guys over 40, can still steal the show.
#13—Samoa Joe (TNA): Samoa Joe may not be one of the smallest guys in TNA, but for a man his size he is as agile as they come. He recently re-claimed the X-Division championship from Homicide in August at the Hard Justice Pay-Per-View, but has lost it since Tied up in the whole Main Event Mafia bull-crap is a hindrance on his career. It's not going to make him, but instead it will likely break him. I think his temperament is right for the small faction but I just don't think it's a wise career choice to align yourself with guys who; A) Can't Wrestler or talk (Booker T, Scott Steiner), B) Injury prone (Kevin Nash, Kurt Angle), C) Washed-up has beens (Booker, Steiner, Nash & Angle), and D) the weakest women in TNA history (Traci Brooks, Sharmelle and Jenna whatever her name is). It's a bad decision.
#12—Montel Vontavious Porter (WWE/RAW): Half man, half amazing, that's how MVP describes himself. Over the past few years, MVP has proven that he can be both a strong heel and baby face. I'm proud of this guy who dresses like a Power Ranger with a snore strip on his nose. I honestly was on the fence with him but now, I see the talent in his work. His in-ring work is solid and he's promo skills are meticulous. Look at him, he's a fine dresser to boot. I would have loved to have him higher up on my list but unfortunately, his shenanigans with The View co-host, Sherri Shepard just didn't do it for me. 
#11—Chris Jericho (WWE/SmackDown—Unified Tag Team Champion): Ever since his return to the WWE, Chris Jericho has tried to save us from something. One things for sure is that he may not have succeeded in defeating Randy Orton, or John Cena, or even Cryme Tyme, but he has definitely learned to rock the manties he sports instead of the long tights. Chris Jericho has always been an übber entity in the ring. He's strong, fast, flexible, technically, aerial, and emotional too. He has the entire package to be the best and he is amongst a stellar list. His promos are bitchin' and fun and easy to understand. His alliance with The Big Show after his original tag team partner, Edge, suffered a nasty injury, is a hindrance in my opinion. Show is too slow in the ring and lacks the stamina. Jericho needs to dump the dead weight.
#10—Kofi Kingston (WWE/RAW): Kofi has totally captured my attention. I was a Kofi fan the moment I saw him in the ring. At times I had my doubts about him, I admit, but any doubt I had, was wiped away at WrestleMania 25 when he dominated the Money In The Bank Ladder Match. Although he didn't win the match, he was the guy, who stood out against the other seven. I'm so happy that Kofi is being given the opportunity to work some prestigious matches. One day I'm positive we will see more from him.
#9—Jack Swagger (WWE/RAW): This guy may look like a total dork, but he has so much actual wrestling talent that he can make anyone look good in the ring. Fairly new to the business, Swagger has dominated some major Superstars in his short time in the business, including Matt Hardy and John Cena. If this guy can make Cena look good, then he truly is the future of this business. Swagger's got that Boom-Boom Pow in the ring, all he's missing is charisma. The future I tell ya, the future!
#8—Evan Bourne (WWE/RAW): I bounced between where to place both Swagger and Evan Bourne. Both have two different styles, but I have to say the high flying skill of Bourne and the energy he creates when he's in the ring, won out. Bourne is youthful, and energetic and a fan favourite. His shooting star press finisher, is textbook. All he's missing is the technical aspect to complete the package. 
#7—Christopher Daniels (TNA): One of the top X-Division stars in TNA's history, Daniels had been a pioneer in the company since it's inception back in 2002. Along with AJ Styles & Samoa Joe, Daniels has been made a star. He has that small build that allows him to do anything in the six-sided ring. Daniels has paved the way for guys like Chris Sabin, Alex Shelley, Jay Lethal, Consequences Creed, and all the smaller guys. To me, that is a very deserving spot in the top ten.
#6—Matt Hardy (WWE/SmackDown): It's no secret that I love and adore Matt Hardy, but you have to understand why. He is the type of person who eats, sleeps, and breathes this business. Matt is technically sound in the ring, a bit risky when it matters, and has been able to pull off both sides, the good guy and the bad guy. He's put his heart and soul into the wrestling business, and he knows how to put guys over while making himself look good at the same time. He's professional and courteous. He very humble to his background. I call him the hardest working man in sports entertainment for a reason, he's been on all three shows in less than nine months, and he does any and all tours he can, numerous amounts of charity work and meet & greets with fans. He would have been in the top 5 for sure, but his intestines pushing through his abdominal wall kept him sidelined for 2 months. Still very deserving. 
#5—John Morrison (WWE/SmackDown—WWE Intercontinental Champion): Some of you may be wondering why I put Jo Mo ahead of Matt Hardy on this list. Well, it has nothing to do with his fantastic abs, but because John Morrison has been constantly wowing viewers over on SmackDown. He's shown that since his break-up with The Miz and the Dirt Sheet, that Morrison has come a long way in the wrestling ring. His in-ring work is amazing, and fresh. His promo skills and charisma were proven long ago with his work on the Dirt Sheet, and he's has yet to have a bad match. John Morrison will be taking over the WWE one day and maybe quite possibly as the next Shawn Michaels (minus what Shawn has become today). Keep your eye on the Shaman of Sexy.
#4—Triple H (WWE/RAW): Triple H may not be my absolute favourite wrestler, but he is shear genius. Give the man some props for being smart enough to marry into the biggest wrestling family in history, The McMahons. Not only that, Triple H is a major headline. Who would have thought that the snooty character of Hunter Hearst Helmsley would drop the courtesying and replace it with crotch chopping and be one of the biggest names in the wrestling industry? Not I! But he is. He is and he deserves the credit. I think that he maybe the reason as to why the WWE has survived as long as it has. Not just him but one of the reasons.
#3—AJ Styles (TNA—TNA Heavyweight Champion): I don't know a whole lot about TNA, I'll be honest. The one person, who has always made me go back and check it out, and pay a bit more attention to them, is this man; AJ Styles. He a clean looking guy with so much talent, charisma, and heart that he just goes out there in that ring and gives it his everything. He helped pioneer the X-Division and has reigned as not only TNA X-Division champion, TNA Tag Team Champion, TNA Legends champion, and TNA Heavyweight Champion, but also has held the NWA World Heavyweight and NWA World Tag Team Championships. He's done it all, and he is still very young, he's only 31. The man is inspiring to others and a great role model for the young fans of today. 
#2—CM Punk (WWE/SmackDown): Speaking of role models, CM Punk's straightedge lifestyle is admirable in today's wrestling society. It's rare to have a superstar who has never tried steroids, or have taken uppers & downers to get through the day. He doesn't even drink or smoke. The Straightedge superstar has also proved that you don't have to be the biggest guy to have a successful wrestling career in the WWE. He's a multi-time winner of the World Heavyweight Championship and a former ECW Champion. It would be a huge mistake to over look Punk as he's proven to the WWE fans that he's not just a good guy but he's also an amazing heel. Multi-talented superstar with a positive lifestyle.And finally we reach the pinnacle of this huge list with the top superstar of TNA and WWE of 2009;
#1—Randy Orton (WWE/RAW-WWE Champion): For me this would have only been a problem if Jeff Hardy had remained with the WWE or if Edge didn't suffer that injury that will keep him out for months on end. The decision would be friggin hard. Randy Orton was a no brainer. The Grandson of Bob Orton, the son of “Cowboy” Bob Orton jr, and the nephew of Barry O, Randy has shown that he is the top Orton in the family by showcasing that his Legacy isn't just about name, it's about what you do with that name. Randy is steady in the ring, a great seller of offensive moves and charismatic as they come. He's an excellent heel and that air of cockiness that emanates from him is the perfect fuel for fans to hate him. You have to admire the skill and precision on how he accomplishes each and every movement in the ring. He has that rare ability to make make his opponent look strong and polished in the ring, even when they aren't. Randy Orton has come a long way but this third generation is far from done. He's pioneering the way that a heel should look in todays society. And that is why he is number 1.And that's it for this weeks Skirt Sheet. Thank-you for taking this four week journey through my Top 50 Male Wrestlers of WWE & TNA. In Life, There Are Winners, and There Are Losers...B Jealous & Be Sexy!!!
WWE Bragging Rights 2009 Predictions
-SmackDown's: John Morrison vs. RAW's: Miz
Sarge's Prediction: Mizzy Jannetty (aka...The Miz)
Diva's Prediction: John Morrison
The Game's Prediction: Miz
The Hitman's Prediction: Jo Mo
-Diva's Team Match-- Team RAW: Melina (Diva's Champ), Kelly Kelly & Gail Kim vs. Team SmackDown: Michelle McCool (Women's Champ), Beth Phoenix & Natalya
Sarge's Prediction: Team SmackDown
Diva's Prediction: Team SmackDown
The Game's Prediction: Team SmackDown
The Hitman's Prediction:Who cares? I mean...Team Raw
-Superstars Team Match-- Team RAW: DX, Kofi Kingston, Jack Swagger, Cody Rhodes, Mark Henry, & Big Show vs. Team SmackDown: Chris Jericho, Kane, Hart Dynasty, Matt Hardy, Finlay & R-Truth
Sarge's Prediction: Team RAW
Diva's Prediction: Team SmackDown (YAY Matt Hardy)
The Game's Prediction: Team RAW
The Hitman's Prediction: Team RAW
-Fatal 4-Way-- World Heavyweight Championship: C) Undertaker vs. Batista vs. Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk
Sarge's Prediction: Undertaker
Diva's Prediction: Undertaker
The Game's Prediction: Undertaker
The Hitman's Prediction: Undertaker
-60mins. Iron Man Match—WWE Championship-- Cena loses, he leaves RAW: C) Randy Orton vs. John Cena
Sarge's Prediction: Orton (too bad it's not Cena leaves WWE!)
Diva's Prediction: Randy Orton (I'm an unrealistic optimist)
The Game's Prediction: Cena via Ted's help
The Hitman's Prediction: Cena
That's it for this weeks Fatal 4-Way. Next week things will get back to normal. We here at the Fatal 4-Way can't wait to hear back from The Hitman, and Diva takes a weekend off from writing. Take it easy and have a safe & Fun Halloween next Saturday.