Let's continue our trip down memory lane (and the dark corners of my mind) with the West Region, where first-weekend games will be played in the western outposts of Chicago, Columbus and Buffalo.  (And a very belated congratulations to William and Mary for winning the 1807 NCAA tournament!)

Winners in bold

#1 Kansas vs Play-in Game Winner
This gives me the opportunity to express my hate of the stupid play-in game.  "Congratulations, men, you've made the NCAA Tournament."  "Not so fast, little team!  You have to play one more game because we need to squeeze another lameass mid-pack BCS conference team into the field!"  I don't even know who's in it; Florida A&M and somebody else, which I'm sure is part of the problem. 

A Cardinal rule of bracket-making is not putting all four #1 seeds into the Final Four, but this year you have it easy because Kansas is a 1 seed, and they're guaranteed to cough it up against somebody. 

#8 Kentucky vs. #9 Villanova
Is there a less-aesthetically pleasing game in the first round?  Two teams sharing the same nickname, which also happens to be the most generic nickname in American sports. The uniforms are nothing to look at either; they've found shades of dark blue I didn't even know existed.  I'll bet the arena has a totally unpainted floor too!  It's like Basketball Grease here.

#5 Virginia Tech vs. #12 Illinois
A few weeks ago Illinois finally retired its repulsive Chief Illiniwek mascot, despite loud protestations from many alumni and boosters, who just can't see why they can't keep making a mockery of people we damn near exterminated.  Hey, it's all fun and games until somebody starts a genocide!  The Hokies will succeed in fighting the Big Knives until they are off our lands, albeit a bit late. 

#4 Southern Illinois vs #13 Holy Cross
Should I mention that the Holy Cross Crusaders play in the Patriot League?  Nah, too rich, can't be true.  That league had no NCAA wins to its credit until two years ago, and even now all of them belong to Bucknell.  Holy Cross is probably getting a bit too much credit for their colleague's work the past two years, and I can't see an experienced SIU team coming out flat against them.

Apparently the selection committee felt it could get over the injustice of shutting out the mid-major leagues by giving SIU and Butler unusually high seeds, and even that came out looking a little ridiculous (does anyone really think there's a seven-seed difference between Butler and ODU?) That said, the Mo.Valley has played like a mjor the past few years, and Southern Illinois probably deserves their seeding.

#6 Duke vs #11 Virginia Commonwealth
Oooh, Virginia's a Commonwealth, not like the rest of us lowly States.  Ooooh, I'm shakin' in muh boots!

Duke is one of those teams you don't expect to be upset in the first round.  (You wait for them to choke later.)  That's because they're rarely seeded low enough to face a stiff test. That changes this year.  The Dookies are overseeded here (the virtue of being Duke, no doubt) but their "reward" is a very stout VCU team that won the suddenly-ascendent CAA.

#3 Pittsburgh vs #14 Wright State
I have no special feeling about this game, but if you're filling out a real bracket (i.e., not being chicken) you have to pick at least one of the 4-13 or 3-14 games to go for the 'dog, and Wright State's being woefully underestimated here.  They were co-champs in the regular season with Butler, and beat them two out of three, including the conference tournament.  Plus, I feel Wright State should be famous for some reason that's not occuring to me right now, so maybe that's what is tugging at me. 

#7 Indiana vs. #10 Gonzaga
Now that Adam Morrison is no longer around, it's ok to like Gonzaga again, with their lovable melting pot of a team that's typical of many West Coast middies.  Unfortunately they aren't as strong as they have been in recent years, and they've long since been unable to sneak up on teams (as witnessed by their middling tournament performance since 2000).  That said, the old Alma Mater has been utterly inept away from Bloomington this year, and a trip out west isn't likely to help.  Plus, if I pick Indiana, I'll be picking all four #7's, and that's a recipe for failure.

#2 UCLA vs #15 Weber State
That's WEE-ber State, of course, but you know that, because they've on the giving end of some big upsets before, most notably beating Michigan State as a 14 seed back in the late '90s.  And they're purple, and you know how I swoon for the purple teams.  I'll have my heart broken here, though.  I've gone through this region like a wild banshee, and I've gotta keep somebody around who can beat Kansas. 

Second Round Onward!

#1 Kansas vs #9 Villanova
#4 Southern Illinois vs #5 Virginia Tech
#11 VCU vs #14 Wright State
#2 UCLA vs #10 Gonzaga

#1 Kansas vs #4 Southern Illinois
#2 UCLA vs #11 VCU

#2 UCLA vs #4 Southern Illinois
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, bastards.