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January 1, 2006 - Sunday 

Category: Writing and Poetry

With Tears

With tears I've fallen, words of doubt

Soothe my ravaged mind

What many wars we fight within

Within the peaceful times

 

With tears like scars,

I've had my wars

I've lived and I have died

With tears like scars,

I've fought so hard

To barely stay alive

 

With tears like scars

Upon my face,

They're dried but still I cry

Left me here

With no embrace

Just tokens on my eyes

But to this world

I've always been

So broken and so blind

 

Crossing rivers swell the earth

Behind a fire's lie

I paid my dues the moment that

My life had all but died

 

Risen eyes upon my glare

But never do I stare

I see the he that's wounded me

But never is he there

 

The silent killer weeps at night

He's killed us in our sleep

Like breezes blown

Making strong

Men become so weak

 

Chains on ankles never lie

You're burdened as you've sewn

Freedom's just an alibi

You're in this world alone

 

But burdened not, the reaping's wrought

Nothing but demise

I didn't know that would be the last

Time I'd see your eyes

 

In tears I'm silent

But they fall

In such chaotic bliss

So discrete the fallen beat's

Melodically abyssed

The harmony's as incomplete

As when you miss nostalgic's kiss

And so we see the bittersweet's

Melodically dismissed

 

With tears from eyes

Upon her dress

I'm ravaged once again

Because of her, I haven't breath

She's stole it from within

 

Just like before when all my words

By her beauty swept away

I haven't breaths for she's become

Something that I pray

 

I pray for then with all my heart

I pray for way back then

But only if from the start

We'd have a different end.

 

A couple's lost the fight to Cancer. One had to be the first to die.


11:05 AM
 
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Jon Sanders

 

Of course, as always, feel free to interpret my words any way you desire. But just as a precautionary measure, here’s what I intended each stanza to convey. I apologize for any confusing or ambiguous lines.

With Tears

With tears I’ve fallen, words of doubt

Soothe my ravaged mind

What many wars we fight within

Within the peaceful times

The wars we fight inside ourselves are often only eased by the overwhelming doubt in the air… When you feel like you just want to give up because there‘s nothing you can do.

With tears like scars,

I’ve had my wars

I’ve lived and I have died

With tears like scars,

I’ve fought so hard

To barely stay alive

The cancer patient who feels like all the treatments are almost in vane.

With tears like scars

Upon my face,

They’re dried but still I cry

Left me here

With no embrace

Just tokens on my eyes

But to this world

I’ve always been

So broken and so blind

The tokens placed on the eyes of the dead in some cultures throughout time to pay the ferryman of hell to cross the river portrayed in Dante’s Inferno.

Crossing rivers swell the earth

Behind a fire’s lie

I paid my dues the moment that

My life had all but died

He believes Hell is not the place for him because of what he’s gone through with cancer. He’s lived a life not like the one promised to all of us. He deserves heaven because of what he’s been through.

Risen eyes upon my glare

But never do I stare

I see the he that’s wounded me

But never is he there

The man has always tried to ignore the cancer in his life. Although it’s never seen, he still knows it’s there.

The silent killer weeps at night

He’s killed us in our sleep

Like breezes blown

Making strong

Men become so weak

Cancer has to feel bad for all the wrong it’s done to so many good people.

Chains on ankles never lie

You’re burdened as you’ve sewn

Freedom’s just an alibi

You’re in this world alone

It’s said that “In life, you get what you deserve”. Trying to free yourself from this truth is impossible. We’re forced to believe this even through times that make us feel so alone.

But burdened not, the reaping’s wrought

Nothing but demise

I didn’t know that would be the last

Time I’d see your eyes

However, no one deserves this fate--- so “getting what you deserve” isn’t always true.

In tears I’m silent

But they fall

In such chaotic bliss

So discrete the fallen beat’s

Melodically abyssed

The harmony’s as incomplete

As when you miss nostalgic’s kiss

And so we see the bittersweet’s

Melodically dismissed

It’s beautiful that the man cares so passionately to cry for his love now gone but all that beauty is lost and never spoken of because of the dreadful horridness of the moment.

With tears from eyes

Upon her dress

I’m ravaged once again

Because of her, I haven’t breath

She’s stole it from within

He cries on her dress at her funeral and loses his breath.

Just like before when all my words

By her beauty swept away

I haven’t breaths for she’s become

Something that I pray

He thinks back to when he lost his breath before because of her beauty. Now he loses them because he’s lost her to the skies.

I pray for then with all my heart

I pray for way back then

But only if from the start

We’d have a different end.

He prays to be in a time so long ago when he still had her but only if he didn’t have to live through her death again.

A couple’s lost the fight to Cancer. One had to be the first to die.

The beginning of the poem is focused on him as he focuses on himself, but by the end all he can think about is her. What’s the worse of the two fates…. To die?… or to have the one you love die? To some, to die is not the worst thing that can happen to you in life.

 


 
Posted by Jon Sanders on November 28, 2005 - Monday - 11:10 AM
[Reply to this] 
Laura Lynn
Laura Sloop

 
WOW!
 
Posted by Laura Lynn on January 30, 2008 - Wednesday - 4:55 PM
[Reply to this] 
Lucy~ Poetry in Motion

 

Great one Charlie...I love this... you are such a wonderful writer with such compassion... Thank you for sharing.

Lucy


 
Posted by Lucy~ Poetry in Motion on November 28, 2005 - Monday - 5:21 PM
[Reply to this] 
april

 
Very touching.
 
Posted by april on November 28, 2005 - Monday - 3:14 PM
[Reply to this] 
jackie

 

hi charlie, i lived with my grandpa for quite some time before he died of cancer, so i can really relate to this. i think you've got something here that hits at the core of the pain people go through in any kind of situation where you lose someone you love.....i think it's definitely worse to have the one you love die. dying is definitely not the worst thing that can happen.


 
Posted by jackie on November 28, 2005 - Monday - 2:56 PM
[Reply to this] 
witandcleverness
Brent Knudson

 
Very intense poem.  Thank you for posting it and letting me read it. 
 
Posted by witandcleverness on November 28, 2005 - Monday - 2:26 PM
[Reply to this] 
Torch

 

I understand the feelings between the couple the love they shared. I've seen that in my grandparents, and in my own marriage, same result with them. Funny, when I started to read this I thought you were going in a completely different direction. At first I was thinking about a political statement w/ the needless wars and then forgiveness and a loss of innocence, but you tied it up really nice in the end. Nice job, as I've come to expect from you. :)

t


 
Posted by Torch on November 28, 2005 - Monday - 5:05 PM
[Reply to this] 
~.:SHA:.~(DaddysGyrl)

 

I like this poem. It reminds me of what i saw in my mom after some loved ones died two days apart. And it reminds me of some things I have written before. Great piece.


 
Posted by ~.:SHA:.~(DaddysGyrl) on November 28, 2005 - Monday - 8:18 PM
[Reply to this] 
!Hello olleH!

 
I like this part:

n tears I’m silent

But they fall

In such chaotic bliss

So discrete the fallen beat’s

Melodically abyssed

The harmony’s as incomplete

As when you miss nostalgic’s kiss

And so we see the bittersweet’s

Melodically dismissed



 
Posted by !Hello olleH! on November 29, 2005 - Tuesday - 4:07 AM
[Reply to this] 
-

 
such a tale! i see a dicodomy of charactor here. the silent almost numb and the ravage in turmoil. the struggle to not let go of the past to accept the future. the repeated references to eyes and the tears that have dried into scars give you the sense of the long draw painful process in dying from cancer. painful for me to read. i lost my father to cancer 2 summers ago. i think there is something posted on my blog. very nice work
 
Posted by - on December 16, 2005 - Friday - 6:43 AM
[Reply to this] 
Erica

 

Wow this is very powerful =( Its so heartbreaking....Where do you draw inspiration?

With tears from eyes

Upon her dress

Im ravaged once again

Because of her, I havent breath

Shes stole it from within....This is my favorite stanza.

I just have 1 question and I normally dont critique because hey I'm not really good enought to but in I think the 11th stanza(last line) sounds a little funny. "Shes become something that I pray" You dont pray her you pray for her.....Maybe you could say shes become the one for whom I pray or something like that...The only reason I say anything is because I really love this so much I think its amazing =) But I read it a few times and that little part stuck out to me. You have a wonderful talent and you diversity in subjects floors me =) Fell free to call me an idiot and remove this comment if ya want to.


 
Posted by Erica on April 5, 2006 - Wednesday - 5:41 PM
[Reply to this] 
cheyenne
cheyenne blackhawk

 
 powerful poem charlie, really like it, and it hit home as i just lost my best friend this week from cancer. really powerful.
 
Posted by cheyenne on November 8, 2006 - Wednesday - 5:36 PM
[Reply to this] 
leilou

 
This is tragically moving. An epic yet simple tale of chances lost and beginnings wasted, decisions wrongly made...opportunities that were never open...I love the rhythmic pulse of it...the heartbeat and its sorrow...this is very very good. Kudos my friend. Lx
 
Posted by leilou on November 8, 2006 - Wednesday - 5:52 PM
[Reply to this] 
S/\R/\H
Sarah Sarfraz

 
im blown away ..... *speechless*
 
Posted by S/\R/\H on April 1, 2007 - Sunday - 4:32 AM
[Reply to this] 
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Jon Sanders



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