So... I've been wondering about a lot lately.  & in the midst of it I kept myself from slipping into an imaginary world of perfect.  Have I been running around in dreamland this whole time?  And I can't believe nobody told me anything!  Everyone's been so supportive of all my fantasies and ideals.  I guess the need for others to see me happy has them caught up too.

Maybe I should just keep things pushing the way I had originally planned.. without letting any emotions run too deep.  In a way I feel like I'm gonna miss out on something good.  At the same time I feel like I should avoid it at all costs.  & truthfully it seems like a lost cause at the moment.  Maybe things will change or open up later.

I just hate being left in the dark with things.