Okay, I'll admit it. I ran the stop sign. But it wasn't like he said. It was one of those rolling stops. You know what I mean. You've done it. You pull up, the road is deserted, you slow down to three miles an hour, look both ways, and go on through. I was hurrying to a parking lot so I could pull over and check out the awesome rainbow in the sky. It was one of the ones that go all the way across the sky without a break, and I wanted to get a good look at it while I could.

The cop was parked in the woods, backed way up in there. As soon as I saw the lights in the rearview mirror, I knew he'd seen me roll through. I pulled over. As he came up to my window, he took a long look at the ropes and foam blocks in my backseat. I use them to carry my canoe on top of my car.

He was one of those really young cops - nineteen, maybe twenty years old - fresh out of the academy. He couldn't even grow a full moustache (though I could see he was trying very hard).

He asked me for my license and insurance. I gave them to him. He told me I was lucky, and that my insurance ran out that very day (June 16), and that if he had pulled me over a few hours later, I'd be getting two tickets. I looked at the insurance card when he handed it back to me. I had another month left. It actually expired July 16.

Dumbass, I thought.

"You know why I pulled you over tonight, son?"

"Yeah," I said. "Probably because I did a rolling stop through that stop sign."

And this is where he turned into a jerk.

"Rolling stop?!" He threw his head back really far and laughed like I'd just told a dirty joke. "Son, you didn't roll through there, you flew through it. You didn't even slow down."

Now, like I said, I did in fact run the stop sign. He had every right to pull me over and give me a ticket if he so chose. But did he have the right to be a jerk about it? It didn't happen like he said it did. I knew it. He knew it.

He wrote me a ticket. He could have given me a warning, and most cops probably would have, but that's okay. It's his decision and I recognize that. But his attitude...On the ticket he wrote "Disregarded Stop Sign." As if I saw the stop sign and made a concentrated effort to ignore it completely.

Then he started interrogating me.

"Where you going this evening, son?"

Well, I wasn't going anywhere, really. Just out for a drive, listening to some music. I certainly wasn't going to tell him I was looking for a good place to look at a rainbow.

"Nowhere," I said.

"Nowhere? Ya gotta be going somewhere, son."

What's with this "son" crap? I thought. I'm at least 8 years older than you!

"No," I said. "Just out for a drive, killing some time."

"Out for a drive, huh?"

What? Is that a crime now?

"Well, where are you coming from?"

"Nowhere."

"Huh." He laughed again. "Well, you gotta be coming from somewhere."

"Not really."

Again. "Where are you coming from, son?"

What is wrong with this guy? What did I ever do to him?  I thought. It's probably the John Kerry sticker on my back window.

"Well, I did just stop at the Starbucks drive-through." I held up my cup of House Blend.

"Oh! Starbucks, huh?" As if that explained everything.

I was sure he was going to search my car at that point. I didn't have any guns or drugs or illegal immigrants stashed in the trunk. I was an innocent, law-abiding citizen, but I shouldn't have to let him search through my car just to prove it to the likes of him. I went to law school buddy, I thought. I know how this works, and I know all about the Fourth Amendment. You just try it. 

He didn't. Something made him change his mind. He lectured me about stop signs, gave me the ticket and left.

"Have a safe night, son," he said as he ambled back to his cruiser.

"Whatever, son," I mumbled. I wasn't brave enough to say it to his face.

He got in his car and followed me for about a quarte of a mile before passing. The speed limit was 40 mph. He passed me going at least 60 mph. I followed him, and he ran two stop signs in a row before turning onto a side street. He didn't even slow down. No rolling stop. He just "flew" right on through.

By that time, the rainbow was gone.