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Current mood:  depressed Category: Life
Does anyone else get easily overwhelmed and emotional when they're sick? I sure do.
I just got back from the grocery store a little while ago. I didn't want to have to be there in the first place, but I had to do what I had to do despite being sick. Life keeps moving forward no matter how awful you feel at any given point in time. In my experience it's almost always in these moments (the ones you really wish you didn't have to be there for in the first place) that things end up going worst case scenario. The pessimist inside of me was semi-prepared, but the newly found optimist inside of me had faith that for once I'd make a plan and it would work out.
I entered the store with three specific goals, and the first two depended on the store cashing a check for me. My first goal was getting myself some medicine for this stupid cold- something to clear me up during the day and something to knock me out at night. My second goal was getting cat food. My third goal was picking up a few groceries. So I optimistically picked out everything I needed in the store, and then headed towards the costumer service counter to cash my last check from my college. And of course... turns out that no stores in my town will cash this check because it's from out of state. All the times before that I've cashed these I had a good bank account, which I don't have anymore. Okay so anyway I had food stamps for the food so at least that went smooth without me having to look like an imbecile. Well, I'm not 100% proud of the fact that I need food stamps to get by but hey- Whatever Works. I was able to borrow a few bucks to get the rest of it, it didn't cost much anyway. It was still basically heart breaking though. When I left my apartment I was happy that I was going to go out and get the few things I need with my own money, and by the end of it I'm another few dollars in debt instead.
It is truly pathetic if you know how much the check that I'm so upset about not being able to cash is for... my life has gotten pretty pathetic really. The check is for $44 and I need it so bad that I felt like I could break down in tears in front of dozens of people. I'm glad I held it in.
I'm guessing that most of this emotional problem is because I'm sick... well that plus the fact that I'm broke & clueless about what my next step in life is.
So anyway... I'm still going to my sister's to baby-sit for the weekend. I think that Nyquil might knock the rest of this cold out tonight though so I might be fine... if not I have some non-drowsy stuff for during the day too. People take care of kids while they have colds all the time so I'm really not all that worried. Plus, Autumn is completely better and she'll be there too. So... like I said I guess I'm not too worried. I'm just so cranky and weird today. I hate being sick... I get sick a few times every year, and I'm just tired of it I guess. Worn out. I have enough willpower and motivation issues without body aches, ear infections, chills, congestion, and coughing added to it.
Okay that is enough complaining for one blog! Sorry!! The next one will be more cheerful I PROMISE!
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