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ICE COLD inTENtions

Jeremy Vasquez


Last Updated: 12/19/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 23
Sign: Capricorn

City: San Bernardino
State: California
Country: US
Signup Date: 11/21/2004

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 /  / 
Saturday, December 19, 2009 
"...chalk on his
fingers,
ash between
his knucks,
snot on his
sleeves match
the glue in his desk,
left-over lasagna
found a hitchhike
ride on his chucks.
he look at me like
i know where
he'll land in 4 years
cause we crawl
threw the same
cabbage patch,
but my baggage
far more than the
average,
so his back pack
the only carry on
luggage until he
grow man hair on his sacks.
oxy-moron-ic>
he got such
innocent pupils
but innocence
in peoples far
gone like sonnets.
and i wanna
be his big brother,
but look how
all the other ones
turned out,
my track record
proceeds me,
and if math
adds correctly,
i'm ineligible cause
of last quarter...ouch
so i'm just there
to make sure the
principle dont end
up knowing him
on a first name basis,
but the principal is,
he running the same
field of dreams i
gave up on,
so i'm watching
how he runs his bases.
when he grow
up he say he
wanna be just like
me,
but i advise him
contrary,
hero's are located
in the comic books
&
character found in the
dictionary.
i hurt people i love,
i tell him,
and i dont' know
if you wanna do
that for a living,
he said,
but to who much
is required,
isn't as equal given?
his pockets filled
with tardy notes,
but the absence of his
father dont' need
to be documented,
docked points from birth,
but [M]om x [C]ourage
squared enough math
he understand to
believe he's the greatest
theory invented.
barely mediocre,
but hardly nor-mal,
2 sides like Harvey,
he been dropped
like service
but not a dent in
his mo-bal (mobil)
and he just a kid
from the streets of
mo-val,
and as bad as life is now,
i just wanna tell him,
it gets more vile.
he put me on a pedestal
if he only knew
what kinda stuff i been framed for,
no plague,
just plagued,
all dogs are of a different pedigree,
some stray
just cause others wear a leash
it don't mean they obey.
his smile never caused
grief,
false hope,
or insult to injury,
so he don't
wear it forbiddingly,
but the bidding be,
much higher
when the stakes
larger,
stocks cobbler,
do or die,
or become
martyr.
his heart
never been
heavy enough
to weigh,
but he ain't
got to step
on a scale
to see life
ain't always
gone his weight.
he makes me a bracelet
from class room
construction paper
and lose ends he
collected,
says as long as
you wear this,
no matter what
hall or wing of his
campus i walk-on
i'm thorughly protected....
he expect the world
from me,
and i wish,
i could give him everything
that's still of life in it,
but he just an example,
what good a man can be,
when he realizes no
matter how much he
stumbles or how dark the
light bulb has been,
it takes but a candle
to re-kindle the light
thats flickers but
never flies away within it..."
-j
Saturday, December 19, 2009 
"...i had a talk with you,
i opened up
arteries
that closed
like jobs
in our
modern economy's.
confessions
i told,
my ace
in the hole,
from heartbreak
to whore,
but alas,
amore
vincit
omnia,
cause love
conquers all.
my broken record,
on repeat,
you soaked in
seconds,
bathtub wasn't
clean,
the ring around
the tub
was the
pedestal i
refused to take
her off,
and the thin line
between love & lust
that you
double douched
but never crossed.
my sword danced
with your shield,
but you were no
knight's tale,
heard her piano notes
during our night tale,
and when we could
have circled bases
i wasn't man enough
to pin our coffin with
9 inch nails.
awkwardly
we laid
like sardines,
as i pondered free
if she was in
similar
predicaments
with other fish
in the sea...
all the while
our eyes
meet at a
standstill,
lips wet
from the
sample,
body
revved for
the gear
uphill,
if love in the
air,
what was this
gas up here?
we re-treated
like
couples,
but even
tails of a
feather
get
ruffled,
carried bags
under my
eyes like
duffles,
added another
seat to this
2 passager,
call this ride
a carpool...
liked our
convo,
you opened
doors
in my condo,
that had
master locks
on top of
slave locks
to bondage
of our cottage
you goldy locks.
you got a
taste our our
porridge,
sat in her
chair,
ate from
her plate,
laid on her
pillow,
our water ran
dry but
dandelions don't
require water
to flourish.
never intended
to use or
confuse you,
but men tend
to act without
lack of a better
word, their
Rubik's cube.
conveniently,
i partook
of your
parfait,
sweet as
strawberry
pistachio,
but my
peach fuzz
was
faithful
to her
mixed fruit
sorbe,
and even
with
mixed feelings
the road lead
me back
to the paths
we crossed
that i promised
my heart never
be caught dead.
your care
came tru
secondary
warnings,
your body
melted icebergs
global
warming,
but truth be told,
when sun rose
on your face
all i saw was
eyes that
resembled
her morning.
condolences
to any part
of you that
became
black roses
in the healing
of what we
were,
but keep this
between us,
from me,
to her..."
-j
Friday, September 18, 2009 
"...
her smile only gets
larger,
even when life
gives strikes
she run bases
like Dodgers,
how dare she
look
star-struck
when her
heart
gets
pot-lucked,
cause
she
factor
happiness
love factory
multiplying
laughs, a must
she is the
product..
by the bonfire
or under
the spot-
light,
she light
up each spot
like she
got
LA gear
shocks
under each
toe,
9 lives
feline
when
she catwalk
can't lie
females
would die
for her
dynamite
cause TMZ
watch
her TNT
lights,
camera,
ghost-ride
cruise-control
every stride
of her stroll
square inch
she
explode.
she steps in
the
name
of love
so
literal
wings
of a
feather,
so aerial
got a
birds eye
view of
her nestle...
no
cookie
dough
she
so raven,
as quoted
never
more,
you condense
your feelings
well,
too Virgo,
immense
sun beams
in your smile,
or shingle,
impress
with ease
hard to find a
counterpart
with adequate
needs
so single!
we gone
for the
winter,
Jupiter
bound,
cupid
shuffle
na,
cupid
shot feel
straight
from his
bow,
and tribal
as your
ink is,
we
ani-morph
so we
liable our
own
species,
in line for
more
pieces,
fly beyond
NASA
space ships.
ya eyes
near
gentle
as your
touch,
no
mirage
dear,
i'm clear
as the
picture
you
paint
no brush,
we
comm.
in a
cypher,
and when
i'm with you,
we
calm
in a
crises,
we gone
like the
viper
cause
since i met you
so gone
are our
vices
love notes
heard em,
moments,
spured em,
pass ports,
board em,
anonymously
from him...

  • ..
Silhouette55.jpg image by FindStuff2
-j

Sunday, September 13, 2009 
the emblem of my heart,
her engine always could,
i-pod shuffle,
i-heart her
i-phone static,
i-heard GOD
pant-ing
in her muffle,
grim- leave her
take your scythe
let her harvest,
she harmless
i'm homeless
i live in her life.
in agony just
asking me
am i dodging
trouble
cause her
kidney
can't
handle me
kick-in
cans
when
she the
mantle
that kindles
of our family.
her
siren sound
with urgence
when
surgeons
explore
her body
like grey's
anatomy,
pray day
2 day
they
operate
better than
i played
operations
& they
attention span
better than
kim kardashian
when she
twitter-an.
breaths-stolen,
flesh-swollen
what's left-
holding.
On
by a thread
where an Oracle?
wear this duracell,
whatever it takes
to keep your
heart drumming
like the energizer
bunny,
just don't let more
batteries leak,
the results could
be horrible.
or even fatal,
time heals all
right?
or maybe
fate will.
but you
irreplaceable,,
ain't ya parts
interchangeable..,
traded in a
broken heart
for 1 just like gold
& that's just
an example
of the feats
you more than
capable.
beat the cancer
in your breast
in 2 rounds,
lost 1,
but your still
phenomenal.
more so,
honorable,
how you let
life take
away your
ability to walk,
but not the
ability to stand.
lost the
right to sight
but you not
your fear to tears.
and ...
after all these years
ya hair trickles thin,
but your spirit triples 10.
and all i want
is the honor
to push your wheelchair
down my graduation lane
in 2010.
but just my
guardian,
come test my
faith again,
and then according,
if she stretched out
her life to the fullest,
and made music
with the power
of curing,
she did her job,
she was your
accordion.
and she's needed
in a far bigger
symphony,
with Beethoven,
Sinatra,
& company.
and at peace
finally,
cause heaven
knows
she baby sat
me
way past her lease,
but if you don't mind,
let her heart smile when
she reads this last piece.
music.jpg music image by instants
-j

Monday, September 07, 2009 
"...duck em
&
dodge em
before
the cam
froze em,
just eye's
still art
but i's
stood out,
pic-shy
no
pixar,
blink-proof,
no
peep show,
no
poppin
off
with the
razzi,
calm
before
the flash
set off
a kami
kaze...
adjourn
any
fuji film
add more
drama
to the
freak show
he in...
admission
free,
they broke
& enter
my dorm
room just
for a
peak,
just information
or their
justification
for the
news break
scandal
from day break
to night mares
on ELMS street...
was it
make up
or mac
homo
or fag,
attack
then
questions
asked,
blade
to his
face
remove
wings
from his
back,
trial
& sentence,
a trail
most men
couldn't
walk with my
shoe's lace...
close
to
a freshman
drop-out,
didn't have
2 close
my eyes 2
black out,
blast street
always,
entertainment
at a probate,
1 day,
heavy
traffic,
1 way,
release
therapy
verge
of run a way,
but i'd die 4
i tap out,,
planes take
off against
wind not
with it on
the runway...
soar
past
conformity,
death row
from
sororities,
rowed the
boat merrily
till dreams
flowed off
short
stories
& into
the life
i showed off
so ordinaries
could witness
bicariously...
flash em
&
cheese em,
camera guy
if you need
em,
why he
take so many
pho-tos?
cause
tragedy
into
triumph
is what
i promo,
capture
each
moment
4 every
second
i post
poned it,
show
teeth
not
defeat
for the
short time
i condoned
it,
kodak
coat-ed,
swagger
load-ed,
catch me
if you can,
gingerbread
code-ed,
murder,
wrote-it,
advice 4
life,
OWN IT
greatest
revenge= just
prevail so
in this tug-a-war
i pull,
past the fame,
beyond the glory,
enjoy the prize,
i just wanna be
successful..."


black-and-white.jpg black and white image by rubidiy

-j
Tuesday, September 01, 2009 
love em
&
leave em,
simple
recipe
for
men
as we
hurt em
&
bleed em

hurd em
&
feed em
sweet
nothings
&
cheap
Lunch-ins
just
for the
sake
of our
EGO.

text
em
when
we
care to,
sex
em
when
they
there to,
&
:)
when
we
have
their
head
2
but
:(
when
we end
up in
their
shoes....

1
by
1
we trade
em in,
disposable
so we
posed 2
upgrade
even when
we'll
find nothing
better then
but how
can a
hypocrite
inspire
better men?

lure em
with
a
smile
cure em
by
a kiss,
save em
4
a second,
& as soon
as they
dream-mares
become the
very thing
which helps
dust-airs,
we pretend
they don't
exist...

and it
ain't
because
we have
a 4
second
attention
span,
or because
4 as long
as our
memories can,
remember
we been
spoon-fed
we lose
interest,
it's because
right
when
the boy
in us
starts
growing up
we realize
the responsibilitie..s
that comes
with being
a man
and we do
just what our
fathers did
with us.
can't do
the time
for a crime
if there
aint to
witness.

move on
&
get over,
that's
what we
learn to
get
good at,
short-term
memory
full-time
assassin,
just the
life of
a con-artist,
too bad
we get
used to it.

old habits
die
hard,
but change
in self
always
a gym pass
away,
we are
who we chose
to be,
if there is a will,
god will always
provide a way...

B23.jpg qua đường image by anhanh_2008

-j





Sunday, August 30, 2009 
"...they say
you can't teach
an old dog new tricks,
but it's easy
to play dead
hard to roll over,
dial down the
middle,
but not till dusk
my minutes
like my contents,
somethings roll over,
not sure 1000
BLIND dates could
get my
prescription back,
i tried it,
nocturnal jinx,
love sucks,
so in my
twilight i guess
the next
full moon
i'll be on that
Nosferatu diet,
we been
seperated
for as much
pesos as we
were collected,
1st time
i found
the cojones
to write of you
cause i felt the
circumcision
on the tip
of my cranium
dissected,
forever &
happily
ever after
are
fairy talers,
simply those
that chose
to view
the alternative
ending on DVD
cause they didn't
like the orignal
movie trailers.
1/2 of anything
i had is
what you took
with you,
1/2 of everything
i have is
what i've felt
without you,
so what,
we never
signed
a pre nup,
not 1 to
air dirty
laundry in
the pub,
but maybe
i inherited
the curse
of Wrigley's
Field as a young
Cub.
don't' believe
in revenge sex,
so I've abstained,
thru poising
your name
so I've been
defanged,
blue from
looking at the
sky we dived
out of, so
I'll travel cross
country by
car or train,
how am
i suppose to
see the bigger
picture when
you've been
photo shopped
into my
photo bucket,
and even though
you closed the door
on you're way out
you forgot
a window frame,
and other than
being asked
"what do think you took
MJ out the game?",
i have to swallow
the memory of
"what happened
to you and what's
her name?"
grandma ask
the last time
we spoke
and i habitually say
yesterday,
but i'm only 1/2
honest cause
my eyes speak
daily with you
on the wall
that you hang...
ain't no clouds
in over my head,
no droughts occupy,
but i can't shake
this overcast,
maybe,
quite possibly,
cause i'm not
over the spell you
cast
maybe it's your
summer rein..."
blackandwhite1.jpg image by findstuff22


-j


Tuesday, August 18, 2009 
"...her eyes follow me,
brown & warm,
cause she
resembles me.
for there is no
love like that
of a mom.
mother dear-est,
otherwise
kin-less,
never seen
me in my
cap & gown,
knows me
when i wore
acne &
white tees
to pull up
the weight
of world
when it
weighed me
down,
22,
for me
is a
full life
for most
of my kind,
the 5 years
she hasn't
held me
enough of
a sentence
of a lifetime,
spent most
my life
hating
waiting
behind people
until i found
the comfort
of standing
in line.
dying to
assimilate,
took an AK 47
to the old me,
dying from the
assassinate,
no wonder,
the boy wonder
was an all american
reject but the story
has enough appeal
for you to wonder
what they  respect.
moved from the flats,
bay bread,
to a suit,
turned heads,
like men in black,
DSL kept me
off my web life
but CSU
put ya boy
on they web cite,
only to fall
from glory
pride
my Achilles,
but time
heals all,
fast on
my feet,
so Air J's
enough air
for the wings
on my heel.
public enemy,
cause i
paint my lifeart
on a Mural,
friends became
enemies
cause i
played with
live hearts
by the plural,
and i never
had the
cour-age
to utter
the apology
i should-have.
but broken
promises
became
G.I. Joes
figures,
collectors
edition,
great to
look at
at,
but other
than the
memory,
far from
mint condition.
stepped
on the scene
eye-candy
like New addition,
but an
addict
to fame
became
just another
E-True
Hollywood Edition.
but it was that
self-..entitlement
that defined
more than what
the titles meant
cause the
household
was far from
stable,
so it became
hard to maintain
constancy,
when my world
changed more
channels that
cable.
and i lived
under the
influence
rather than
above,
just an overdose
so when i had
my real chance
at love,
like VH 1,
ratings
were high,
but season
2 became
inevitable
as season
1 came
to a close.
enough week
end lovers
to fill black
history month,
but i'd trade
it all for
the 2nd chance
i ran out of
after my ego
ran out of
bridges to crush...
ironic,
that the animal
that bears my
chest is
the phoenix,
as it only engulfs
itself in it's
own inferno,
only to rise
again & again 2
it's lonely life
cause the things
that get closest
only self destruct....
just a ticking time
bomb,
as i think thru
time of all
that went wrong,
and thru it all
her eyes still follow me.
brown & warm
so i changed the
context of my eyes
so i'd lost sight i was
her first born,.."
pheonix.jpg image by Euregatto
-j

Tuesday, August 11, 2009 
love & ice.
both cold as
the jewels
that laced your
neck,
goose bumps,
butter flies,
a love only
mother nature
could properly
reflect.
you chose me,
i chose you,
we changed
the temp.
sure,
but the
juice was worth
the squeeze,
my peach fuz
& your nectar,
lovers
&
friends,
next of kin,
to the X again,
but thru
our texts
&
aches,
we grew
the stomach
for wrecks,
man made
& designed,
you were my
seeing-eye,
dog,
when love
left me blind.
and we
tried to
perfect an
art we
never found
time to furnish,
we ran out
of time,
or perhaps
we didn't
raise a hair
when we
started the
race without
the tortoise,
moms
crafted you
from material
that when
mixed with
adversity
you only
flurish,
and maybe
we weren't
meant to be,
but this poem
was on purpose.
humans can't
be an etch a sketch,
cause the heart
can't erase the
memory of two
doves that flew
with broken wings
from a single nest.
we shared more
than the bed
we floored,
we opened
that door
that we swore
we'd never
unboard.
and in that
brief treaty,
love & ice,
became 
our cold treat...

-j
Saturday, May 02, 2009 

And if the aim

Is to be better

Than our

Fathers,

You’ve already

Done that….

Purple Heart

I reward,

White flag

The war

You already

Won that,

1st college

Grad = milestone,

Drum roll, please,

Had to be hard

As a rock, ya pop

Was a rolling stone.

Pre-school was the

Last time he paid dudes,

But your life a movie,

Too bad he only

Caught the previews.

Moms put you on,

like speedstick

you put under

your arm,

so 24/7,

you never had

to sweat it

You been A Hooper since

Knee height

Finger roll like
Magic,

Hook like Worthy,

You #24 on the court

You use to Celtic.

And you asking,

Should you invite

Him,

Or should you not,

This ain’t on that,

He love me,

He love me not,

But amnesia

Of the mind

Don’t cleanse

a soul when your heart

Never forgot.

And you a walk away

From earning

Ya bachelors,

But before he walked

Away you were his

Greatest batch

Of wonders.

The Apple fell far

From the tree,

But you still the

Spitting image,
King Cobra venom

In your veins,

Every time you spit

Sin of his living.

But since

Yours nose

Look like his,

And you ears

Point out like his,

And everytime

Your mother look

At you she must

Look into eyes

Like his,

So when tears

Trespass on those lids,

He made the bed,

Now he got to sleep in it,

BUT He got a guest pass

He could sleep

Where I live.

Cause you...

Was 1 of the toughest

To face on his

Long list,

But you 1

Of the hardest 2

Replace

On my short list.

The family tree

Isn’t perfect,

But you been writing

Books from scratch,

Became a lighthouse

From a match.

Became a man when you had

No male role models to attach

 

Weather or not

His absence might

Have hit the hardest,

Or he was

A hindrance,

But you still

Kissed the sky

Like you was

Jimmie Hendrix.

He might be dead

In the mental sense,

And you might

Have given him

1 after another

After another

After another

Chance,

You’ve been a Mother’s

Day Gift

Every Day

Since your

Birthdate passed.

Ain’t no

Reimbursement

For all the

Grief he caused,

But I put a

Fist for the cause,

My money,

To go against

All odds,

Pedal to the metal,

Live above the laws,

And my faith

That you

Will be the

Kind of father,

Your children

Give Thank 4 everytime

They pray to GOD

The aim is to better

Than our fathers,

And you’ve already done that,

Hope to see him

At your graduation,

Tell him your son

Became my brother,

Which makes you my stepfather,

But I’ll call you dad.


-j