Halloween, Halloween... I had NO big plans...  Skipped mOOnFesT altogether because we've just outgrown it... no that sounds arrogant.  we're too old, period.  Knowing that Information Society was slated to play at RSC was like walking unsuspectingly through a spider's web... you know immediately, then forget and then hours later feel like it's still on you.... basically, i found out, entertained the thought, days passed i remembered again... vaguely.... most important was figuring out what the kids were going to be... Macy  decided to be a gypsy and we threw that get-up together for zero dollars... Tristan entertained Zohan after last year's Borat, but really, the whole 'package' area freaked me out..... So Friday morning the kids had ortho appointments, hit that, then back to school... Gloria came by in the midst of my cleaning fit, I brewed up a pot-o-coffee and we discussed the wedding she & R were attending that night... I offered up some accoutrements to her already FAB attire... We managed to while away 3 hours in what seemed like 30 minutes, but just like that, all of my chores were done and it felt like it was only 10a.m.  yadda yadda.....I like playing dress up with her... Tristan came home from school and I came up with the wild idea of him being a mechanic, he wore one of my dad's old shirts with the name tag and company on it, greased himself up with a concoction of eye shadow and lotion and I grabbed him a toolbox for his candy, again, zero dollars.... it was a hit... comments all night......  Touched base with Nicole... Sarah and I were entertaining Information Society... she said they had cancelled.  I withheld this from Sarah until later... After walking around for 3 hours with the kids I was wiped out, but decided I would rally if she would accompany me for one drink... she agreed.  i literally threw on a pair of jeans and flip flops and on my way to the car called Amey... See you at Harry's in five?  She was in... with a vengeance.  Amey had just pulled in, but then her reverse lights came on... I hopped out to see wtf she was doing... my 'one-for-the-road' in hand... She hugged me through the window then dragged me in by the back of my pants... I landed in a heap on the passenger seat, never spilling a drop, in a hysterical fit of laughter...  Whew, okay, parked in the back, met up with Sarah again...  Amey was a few ahead of us... we had ground to make up.  Sarah and Amey said they had just seen Sharon, yet she was nowhere inside... we ordered up a cocktail and i called her, we somehow just missed her!   Dang.  So the moms exchanged tales of costumes and freaks at the door, our run-in with a couple of reverse trick-or-treaters and laughed on... Texted G-n-R to say swing by so we could oogle at their costumes...  they did.  Warhol and BoPeep in tow...  Amey was done, thought she slipped out unnoticed... ran after her... drove her home after an interesting detour and a donut tour...  insiders only on that one... sarah followed and we were back at Harry's, I touched Mathew inappropriately(there is evidence) and stole his eye patch... fended off the greasy chick-fil-A guy and averted my eyes from the see-thru leather ensemble on the 50+ year old biker beside me...  I had had so much FUN up to this point that i could have easily gone home content... said g'bye to Gloria, she said come for one... wait that was the original plan, but Sarah was down and she was driving, I was all in... Great music, more drinks and all-out hilarity ensued...  I can't even begin... there's too much... but all good... Mathew leans in and says Gloria is at the Lounge.... when a song we didn't love came on, we went over... ouchhh, a little brighter over there, and we danced alone... decided it was time to mosey on home... scratch that, it was time for food!  yes.  Ran into Steev, invited him to join us... great, done deal.  We(sarah & i) felt compelled to climb some crazy parking garage equipment and take pics... at that point it felt like a mechanical bull minus the mechaincal... laughter, potty break and we're off.  oh wait that's gloria.  she didn't feel like sitting in a corner with a glass of water so we nabbed her and threw her into the van... there was bashing.  there was laughing.  there was singing .  and then there was the blowout!  wtf was that?  flop flop thump... flop thump... we blew out  a tire.  coasted into publix.  gasped at the slash.  tried the roadside pump.  yeah, no.  called steev, he had JUST left ahead of us and we were 1 minute away from Howley's... he no answer.  Gloria had Ramon's keys so that was a no brainer.  Called Keenan, we was passed out, but Billy answered.  He didn't offer to come get us, which for some reason didn't puzzle us at the time.  Called Nicole, she no answer.  Sharon rescued Gloria last week so she had immunity.  Last resort, Greg, who we had left with ALL the children.  Not answering his cell.  A-ha! the house phone... we have a winner!  A groggy, somewhat pissy winner, but yes, we have salvation.  however we unanimously decide that once he arrives we simply must coerce him into taking us to Howley's still... it was a neccessity.  I think he was still asleep when he arrived, but he obliged, grudgingly.  Steev called back, services no longer needed, but he joined the posse.  Greg got filled in on water in corners and harry's and the blow out over grilled cheese, fries, omellets, a crab cake and a round of shots???  Seriously? LMAO.  It's pretty cloudy, but I knew I had fun when I got up around 9am and was still loopy... If i ate a grilled cheese & fries at 4am and was still shitty at 9am I had a damn good time.  i needed a cheeseburger.  and where was my scarf?  the van was at ghetto publix.  bo peep.  ramon.  warhol.  amey.  college parties are always fun. ....xjlsurnv3$%^&........ open mouth, insert motrin.  sip water, close, swallow.  Text retardedly, lmao.  Rally in the name of the scarf.  Arrive at parking garage.  No scarf.  Green market it is.  Umbrella and flip flops.  Fresh bread and artisan cheese and rain, uncontrollable laughter.  Sarah and Amey and Gloria... I can't wait until HaLLoWeeN next year! 

As most of you know, I am a firm believer in living a proactive life...  Live every day as though it's your last, because one day it will be... that's not to say I'm living a crazy all out party over here... just that I want to experience as much as I can, allow my kids to do the same, to realize what matters.  If I let them stay home from school because I want to spend time with them, and they have earned straight A's all year then I don't want the damn school board knocking down my door about it...

So, last night was RSC's big coming of age party...  Flock of Seagulls being the big 80's headliner... now here's a band that my 9 year old daughter is actually familiar with because "i ran" is a staple 'boat song' for us... air guitars here we come... She snatched the flyer up at Howley's a week ago and I decided that since the boys would be on the boat trip that it would be pretty damn coll to see them together, even though i knew it would be late.  She was all for it and my mom joined in as well...  FF 15 years... she's 24 and telling her friends that she saw this band 15 yrs ago with her mom AND grandmother... sweet!  Long story short is... we caught Summer Blanket, strolled down to the fountain, grabbed some pizza, hit the gift shop, strolled back and finally, after that crazy ass glitter ping pong drop... we got to see the show.  She went through about an hour of really sweaty, tired deliberations of should i stay or should i go... but in the end we were right up in front of the stage dancing and singing away... and when the guitarist threw his pick and everyone else was too hammered to even see it Macy got right down and snatched it up.  We left immediately after that, hot, sweaty and tired...  and as we crossed the middle of the 500 block some JACKASS says "now why would you have a child out here?"  quite loud enough for me to hear, but not directly to me... so i whirled around, stopped and asked, "why are YOU worried about it?!?"  seriously?  that's none of your freakin' business.  Macy and I had a ball, she got to experience a piece of the other side of life, "wow, the freaks really DO come out at night", she kept saying.  NO harm done, nothing she couldn't handle, she got to see an 80's icon... we had a great time and i was completely sober... hey guy, why don't you get yourself a life to worry about and i'll take care of mine? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...  i was so pissed!  i'm venting, so now i feel oodles better and thanks for "listening"...  i was going to do this last night when i was all ramped up, but Macy asked if we could skinny dip by moonlight when we got home, so we did that instead... cool, calm and collected after that we just hopped into bed!

really, my list making habit is out of control.  i have been "listing" like crazy lately... house projects, summer plans, etc.  the other night i went to tuck macy into bed and i was in the middle of finishing up the dishes, organizing my list, waiting for my sheets to come out of the dryer and watching 'the first 48'... i swooped down and gave her a kiss, pulled back to leave and she clamped onto my neck...waaaaiiiittttt..... i want you to love me up a little.... and my first reaction was, no, i can't i have a million things to do... and in the very next second i let all of that go and just melted into her.  loving eyes looking into mine, tiny clusters of freckles scattered over her nose and cheeks, tousled hair strewn across her pillow, big grin and arms still locked around my neck... these are the moments i live for.  not crossing things off of a never-ending list, or making sure that the dishes are put away or that all of the laundry is done...becasue it NEVER is! so let this remind you that it is those priceless moments that you can't let pass you by!

i am not immortal.

whatever i put off for later may never be.

whoever doesn't know NOW that i love them may never know.

 

don't procrastinate.  take a minute to TELL the people you love that you REALLY DO love them.  too often we assume that emotions and feelings are understood, and we neglect to verbalize how we feel to the most important people in our lives.

live as though this may be your last day, one day it will be.  will you have regrets?

Tough Fight

The things I do not like in you,

Are the things I fight in me.

But when I battle them in you,

It is easier to win.

 

*Points to ponder...

I made dinner for Greg, the rugrats and my parents on Valentine's Day.  Macy  was making cards for everyone... she presented them to each person and then sat down, quite satisfied with herself.  On the inside of the card she gave to my parents it said, "Love only lasts as long as its supposed to."  At first glance my mom was a tad bewildered, but then she read it again, and again out loud.  Each time she read it, the words became truer.  Mine simply stated, "love matters" and Tristan's claimed that she would love him no matter what he did... she loves him like crazy!

Saturday I whisked her off to the beach for a mommy-daughter date day... metal-detector in hand we set off to find some treasure, after all it is Palm Beach!  No luck, but we had a good time... on our walk back she looked up and asked, "mom, why aren't those people with the billion dollar houses out enjoying their beaches?  what is wrong with them?"  Good question, Macy.  Later, at the ice cream shoppe with a crisp five dollar bill burning a hole in her pocket, I tried to discourage her from blowing her dough on more sugar in the form of over-priced candy by offering up these words of wisdom..."hey maybe if you started saving all those dollars that you get from everyone on holidays and birthdays, maybe you could be a billionaire someday..." and this was her immediate reply~  "I don't want to be a billionaire!  Billionaires are NEVER happy!"  She got me there...

"Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands."  Anne Frank

according to webster a relationship is the condition of being related, a connection or associaition by blood, marriage or kinship...or a particular type of connection between people related or having dealings with each other.  it does not state anywhere that these 'relationships', whether between friends, parents, siblings, lovers, spouses or children most often begin with reckless abandon(all of them really if you think about it a sec...) then drift aimlessly into the mundane routine of daily life... it gets complicated from here.  and to which degree of complication is dependent on which relationship i suppose.  >>sidenote: i have no problems with my man or children at present<<  i have, of late, found myself having to deal with a multitude of issues that, quite frankly, i don't have any desire to be sorting out or wasting my energy on.  most recently i had a "friend" delete me from their messenger list after a sarcastic exchange...  really?  you deleted me?  so that's it then?  we're no longer friends?  did you think i was going to get on the phone and call, beg to be added back?  play  your game?  um, nope.  after i finished laughing my ass off i went back to folding my laundry, then hit the beach and later i celebrated my liberation with a ginormous serving of ice cream.  i have a LIFE.  you made your choice.  now take a deep breath and swallow what you just bit off.  i'll be at the beach, on the ball field, or at ballet... i'll be singing, dancing, camping, and laughing... i'll be loving my life and living it right.  peace out.

this morning, just like every other schoolday morn, Greg asked Macy whether she wanted to have lunch at school(pizza or chicken nuggets today, which are both high on her 'list') or to bring her lunch from home.  her reply was...

"well i think i'd rather have a lunch from home because there's a lot more love in that food than what those ladies with the gloves and hair nets give ya..."  i almost choked on my coffee!   lord, i LOVE that child!  and so Greg preceded to make her an extra special love-filled lunch!  xoxo

i stopped at the grocery store yesterday, grabbed a few items on my way home.  as i stood in line a manager came up to the cashier and told her not to ask for "that" over the intercom... i hadn't heard what had been said.  then as i moved forward and replaced my basket into the stack the manager was chatting with another manager...'i've heard you tell her that before, ' blah blah blah. the guy in front of me had bought a few bulk cases of water.  'you ARE tagging all those items that can't be bagged with stickers, right?'  she replied that she was, unless the customer had put them back into their cart.  the cashier was in her 60's, the managers much younger.  it made me sick they way they taunted, manipulated.  i guess you had to see it.  but i paid for my groceries, touched her hand and made eye contact with her.  your life is bigger than this grocery store, than this job, than these women who think they are better than you are.  i hope she heard me.