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Johnny Psu ®



Dernière mise à jour : 27/11/2009

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Sexe : Male
Statut : Célibataire
Age : 36
Zodiaque: Verseau

Ville : The Great Below...NYC
Région : New York
Pays: US
Date d’inscription :: 30/03/2005

Souscriptions
JONNIE ROCKIT
Hollicidal (i'm a maniac!)
Jeff Hates

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lundi, août 03, 2009 

Humeur actuelle :  barbant




Hello once again my dear friends.
Here is the latest of blog life.
I was just sitting around thinking of what new subject to write about on here and I decided with all the times I have walked up on conversations in bars, while working or drinking, and heard some of the funniest parts of conversations that were only meant for the person they were talking to, I would try to string those together in here with some of my favorite poetry quotes, movie quotes, tv... etc.
Some are wonderously funny and some are plain crude but most of them will get some kind of reaction in each and every one of you that read it and that has been the sole purpose of my writting from day one.
I will gradually add more to this as I think of more, get new stories, or read new ones I like.
I hope you enjoy.
Oh, and if you know me, try and figure out which ones are mine and which ones are from where.
Johnny

8/8/08

This was an exchange between myself and a woman coming into my bar...

1.  'Hi, Can I see your I.D. please?'
woman's reply- 'I'm 43. I'm old enough to be your mother!'
In which I replied-  'If you were 8... AND A WHORE!!!'

This one was purely accidental by me but, hysterical just the same. I was at my friends wedding reception and the groom's mother was giving a speech.  The first thing she said was how nervous she was about public speaking.  To this my reply was...
 
2. 'Just picture all of us in YOUR underwear.'

3. If my floor was my glass, I would finally be getting the ice in my drink.

4. Sex turns straight people gay and gays into Mexicans.

5. Gimme a vial of sperm and an applicator that looks like Jodi Foster's knuckles... said the lesbian at the sperm bank.

6. Slutty is the new black.

7. I am a man armed with a fork in a land of soup.

8. I was going to buy KY Jelly at the store earlier but, they were all out. I got Smuckers instead.

9. Hey, I just made this peanut butter and jelly sandwich and it tastes weird!

10. My penis tastes so good, if I put it on top of your head, your tongue would beat you to death trying to get to it.

11. I live in a world of pancakes and urine.

12. 'The truth must dazzle gradually, or every man be blind.'

13. The last time I got a piece of ass is when my finger broke through the toilet paper.

14. 'Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.'

15. Its only binge drinking if you stop!!!

8/26/08

16. If god didn't want us to eat animals, he would not have made them out of MEAT!!!

17. Not everyone is lucky enough to be raised in a white trash trailer park, by a bow legged female whose sole qualifications  for motherhood are a womb and, the ability to catch sperm from a passing truck driver.

18. At least my momma took me to NASCAR.

19. I didnt drink for 10 years.
What happened that you started drinking?
I turned 11.

9/14/08

20. Life is a waste of time.
Time is a waste of life.
So, why not get wasted and have the time of your life?

21. Its a shame you pay all that money for your ex-wife and, your old house and, you are not allowed in either one of them.

9/18/08

22. You are so 'anal' you should have a bumper sticker that reads... 'MY OTHER CAR IS A PUCKERED RECTUM'

23. Bill Clinton was the first 'black  president'... He lied and cheated on his wife, plays sax, and has sex with ugly white women.

24. You have the voice of an angel!!! Its like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.

25. If it ain't broke... BREAK IT!!!

9/26/08

26.  ...Her vagina resembled an over-packed suit case...

27.  Join the marines. Its not just a job, its an 'occupation' wink wink

10/03/08

28.  'Its not what you have that makes you who you are, its what you have done.'

10/23/08

29. ... You cant get pregnant from pies!!!

30.  CONDOMS... Because you cant cure AIDS with a coat hanger.  (Bar Goddess)

31. ... So it was just dangling there and not working...
*I actually walked up on that one as a girl was talking to Frank Wood.  Coincidence???  HA HA HA

12/04/08

32.  you're only as young as the women you feel.

33.  that bar is nothing more than a toilet with a door man.

34. Im off to find the mythical clitoris.

35. When life gives you lemons, I say, screw the lemons, and bail.

36. you're not ice cream. You are cold diarrhea in a dixie cup.

37. If they could put a man on the moon, I bet we can put a woman on you.

38. Christmas is coming and I have a whole sack full of goodies for you!!!

39. DING DONG!!!

40. If I could make somebody dead with my mind, it would be you.

12/19/08

41.  'I talked to a lot of serial killers in my time and he was the cold BLOODED-EST...'  *yes, the hill-billy sheriff actually said cold bloodedest.

42.  "I love it here. The sun is chirping, the birds are shining and, the water is wet."

1/21/09

43. "Eggs have no business dancing with stones."

44. " I dont eat a lot. I eat once in a while. And, when I eat once in a while, I eat a lot."

45. Im gonna smack your face right off your face!!!

46. Somebody drank my drunk!

1/24/09

47. Question---How do you sleep at night?!?!
       Answer---Usually, drunk and with someone under me.

3/22/09

48. Knowledge is the enemy of faith.

49. I'm not homeless. I just forgot where I parked my house.

6/3/09

50. Bro... She may not be muslim but I will bet you ANYTHING she is face down in the carpet 5 times a day!!!

51. I'm convinced that corn is the bookmark of poop.

52. Her Vagina looked like a handfull of raisins!!!

53.  Text msg--- 
"Im on line in Starbucks and this woman keeps hitting into me with her stroller. What should I do?"
 
reply- "Kick her baby!!!"

54. Dating a 22 year old is like hiring an amazing carpenter. No wood goes to waste!!!


10:55  
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lundi, décembre 29, 2008 
Feel free to copy and re-post this.
I have and, there are a lot of little things in here that add up to, A LOT OF BIG THINGS.
This first few paragraphs are all me.
After that, its a re-post.

I would have voted for Ron Paul if I was not so worried it would have helped McCain beat Obama.
Unfortunately, this country only recognizes 2 parties , in the media, and pushes the others out of the picture.
Ron Paul presented many amazing FACTS and ways to turn this country, and planet around but, since all the attention and media only focused on dems and republicans, no one heard those words and ideas.
And, no one gave him a real debate, pushed into in the public eye on prime time tv.
There was more coverage about Palin's teenage daughter being pregnant and, of Palin's shopping tendencies than there was about Ron Paul.
How many of you even knew who Ron Paul was before reading this?
No, not Ru Paul, Ron Paul!
This election was basically the "Lesser of 2 Evils" vote.
Granted, Obama has many great ideas and, if he does half of what he promised, we will be a much better country, and planet.
BUT, Ron Paul has had great ideas for us, not just our country but, globally.
Better than most other politicians, in many many years.
Unfortunately, this info comes a bit late for most of you.
Hopefully, we can make it easier for a little guy to make it into a serious run for the presidency, in the future.
Try and make your local politicians listen to YOU.
That's what they are SUPPOSED to do.
Try and make them push better things into play for everyone's benefit.
STOP letting them do things for the betterment of the few.
I dont want to be the Ron Paul "poster boy" or anything but, I do think we should try and help the little guy be heard again.
After all, thats how this country got started.
Johnny



----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: JIMMY THE SAINT
Date: Dec 28, 2008 4:53 PM


----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: Irish American Patriot:To Hell with OBAMA!!
Date: Dec 27, 2008 1:29 PM


----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: Orwellian Bob
Date: Dec 27, 2008 1:20 PM


----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: Theresa
Date: Dec 27, 2008 12:10 PM




The sole intent of this video is to educate you to the fact that the real rulers of the UNITED STATES is, and has been for quite some time, the private Federal Reserve banking system. John Fitzgerald Kennedy threaten the future of the central bank on June 4, 1963 when he signed presidential Executive Order No. 11110. This order gave the treasury branch of government the power to issue silver certificates, which in essence would have eliminated the demand for federal reserve notes, the tool which was used to enslave our once wealthy nation.


Within five short months of signing the presidential order, Kennedy was assassinated in broad daylight, suffice to say the order was ignored, and or invalidated by his successor, Johnson. The history of the struggle between united States presidents and international bankers has been very lengthy and spans all the way back to the days of Lincoln, and Jackson.


As you know, "He who owns the gold, makes the rules", earlier in American history on April 5th 1933 U.S. President Franklin D.
Roosevelt signed Executive Order 6102 which forbade the Hoarding of Gold Coin, Gold Bullion, and Gold Certificates, go figure, can you imagine that hoarding / holding your own money was made illegal in 1933 and people bought that hook line and sinker!?

Think of that next time someone asks you if they can hold a 20, it's a hustle now, like it's always been, history repeats. So now that were on the verge of a completely collapsed economy, and probably a decade long depression. You know the truth, you've been lied to, there going to get away with it, and there aint sh!t you can do about it, except extract what little trust you had from the clutches of government and into the safety of your own paranoia. Buy storable food right now, while you can still afford it. Buy guns and ammunition if you feel the need for the ability to physically protect yourself from threats that may arise in an unstable economy.


Ron Paul courageously addressed the root of this problem months ago during his run for the White House, retrospectively, I'm sure you can understand how the mainstream media and propaganda pundits were fools for doubting his strong reasoning and simple common sense that struck to the root core of the problems that we are suffering from today. Unfortunately we didn't get Ron Paul into office, the censorship and propaganda was to powerful, and the corporate illusion of "Change ™" prevailed.


Now that you've seen this video and you know and realize that Obama will not address the root of our problem, that being the Federal Reserve. Rest assured, things will go progressively and hastily into a downward spiral from this point forward. The hardships will be great, and we must be strong in order to survive, now that you've been awakened, please take time to educate others on how we've been swindled so that we don't fall for governments false solutions to this problem, that will be crafted with the intent of further enslaving us all.


I have bad news, the depression is already here, it has been here for quite sometime now. The mainstream media is simply in denial and would rather tell you that it's merely a recession. Martial Law is coming next, be ready for swift "Change ™" to come. This country is about to be turned upside down, and we are all to blame. Educate people on the nature of the Federal Reserve system, EO 11110, and EO 6102, also watch the movie. America From Freedom to Fascism.


Good Luck...

Executive Order 11110
http://www. en. wikipedia. org/wiki/Executive_Order_11110

Executive Order 6102
http://en. wikipedia. org/wiki/Executive_Order_6102

America From Freedom to Fascism
http://video. google. com/videoplay?docid=-1656880303867390173

The Money Masters
http://video. google. com/videoplay?docid=-515319560256183936



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



thanks: -Mudd
RE: To All Patriots~Our Power~Our Responsibility

----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: SUPPORT HR 2755
Date: 27 Dec 2008, 11:33


Photobucket

From: Donna
Date: Dec 17, 2008 12:55 PM



6:40  
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mardi, décembre 23, 2008 

Humeur actuelle :  extatique
Just FYI...

The Wii Bowling nights will be at 9PM on the FIRST MONDAY,
THIRD MONDAY,
and
FOURTH MONDAY
of EVERY MONTH
starting in November,
unless otherwise posted.
As they grow we will be doing more exciting things for them.

ie.
Theme nights, pizza parties, live bands while we play, hecklers, clowns, jugglers, sword swallowers, glass eaters...
You get the point.

Photobucket

So come down to Otto's shrunken Head and have a great time with Mii and all the other Wii people from around town.
Hope to see you there,
Johnny

Ottos is Located at 14th St between Ave A and Ave B
on the lower east side of Manhattan.
It is just one and a half blocks east of the
1st Ave stop on the L train
For directions you can call Ottos at
212-228-2240

Testimonials and things overheard during Wii Bowling at Otto's :

"I think we are ready to get all you crazy kids down here for a grand ol' time."
Uncle Steve- O.S.H.

"I think everyone needs a little head... Oh, and Wii Bowling!!!"
Naughty Nell- O.S.H.

"Shut up and BOWL!!!"
Natasha- O.S.H.

"I can bowl AND cut hair at the same time!!!
Thanks Wii Bowling!!!"
Ru- O.S.H

"If I could kill people with my mind, you would be dead. Now stop leaving every time its your turn to bowl!!!"
Johnny- O.S.H.

"Oh my god!!!  I got a strike!!!  DING DONG!!!"
Gia

"BOLLOCKS!!! I love this game!!!"
Mr. Bill

"You will all bow before me and kiss my Wii!!!"
Tricky  A.K.A- Angry Eyes

These are the...

Photobucket

So Far...
High Scores...

Week One- Mr. Bill-   221
Week Four- Johnny Psu-  225
Week Four- Johnny Psu-  234
And still holding the score till someone beats it...



6:30  
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lundi, décembre 15, 2008 
This was originally posted by my friend Elmo but I totally and whole heartedly agree with every point made here.
Im tired of the little guy always getting the shaft!!!
Its hard enough trying to make it in this business without PAY-TO-PLAY antics.
Cheers,
Johnny


IM SORRY....I CANT BITE MY TOUNGE ANY LONGER....
I HAVE TO CALL A SPADE A SPADE....

DEC 21ST-- CLUB LOADED IS HAVING BIOHAZARD/LIFE OF AGONY  PLAY THE CRAZY DONKEY ON LONG ISLAND.  THEY ARE STARTING THE DOORS AT 4PM SO THEY CAN HAVE A SHITLOAD OF OPENING BANDS WHO MADE A DEAL TO SELL 100 TICKETS @ @35.
00 DOLLARS A POP!

THIS IS A PERFECT EXAMPLE OF A PAY TO PLAY POLICY WHERE THE CLUB BOOKS OVERPRICED BANDS - DRIVES UP THE DOOR - AND DANGLES CARROTS IN FRONT OF THE HEADS OF THESE LITTLE BANDS TO FOOT THE BILL !

WHEN THE TALK OF THIS SHOW WAS BUZZING AROUND IN THE SUMMER-JULY TO BE EXACT-  - MY FRIEND , WHO ALWAYS LOOKS OUT FOR US, WENT OUT OF HIS WAY AND INTRODUCED ME TO THIS GUY DAVE WHO BOOKS THERE... IN THE BACK OF THE CRAZY DONKEY. MY FRIEND SAID YOU SHOULD GET SOUTHPAW TO PLAY BIOHAZARD AND HE SAID "SURE...LET'S JUST GET YOU TO SELL SOME TICKETS", I POLITELY SAID " YEAH WE DON'T DO THAT" AND HE SHOT ME A LOOK LIKE A RAPED HIS MOTHER, TURNED HIS BACK ON ME AND WALKED AWAY.
  WE LAUGHED AND SAID" SO MUCH FOR THAT! " HAHA

IM NOT BEING A HATER...THAT ROLLED RIGHT OFF OUR BACKS AND WE LAUGHED ABOUT IT. IT ACTUALLY SPARKED GEORGE REYNOLDS AND I TO WRITE THAT 'PAY TO PLAY' THING WHEN WE SAW HOW RAMPANT THIS POLICY WAS GETTING.


LISTEN...  WHEN BANDS AGREE TO SELL 100   TICKETS ..AT $35.00 A POP AND ALSO AGREE TO PAY FOR THE UNSOLD ONES.....YOUR A PART OF THE PROBLEM NOT THE SOLUTION. YOUR MAKING IT PAR FOR THE COURSE.....NO MATTER WHAT SCENE YOUR IN!
IM NOT SAYING DONT PROMOTE. SHAME ON YOU IF YOUR NOT OUT THERE PROMOTNG HARD FOR THE GUY WHO RUNS THE RISK..IM NOT EVEN SAYING DONT TAKE TICKETS TO SELL...BUT TO AGREE TO PAY FOR UNSOLD ONES????? THAT IS OUT OF CONTROL...ESPECIALLY AT THAT PRICE.


IF YOU DONT HAVE FAITH IN BIOHAZARD / LIFE OF AGONY TO COVER THEIR GUARANTTEE.....THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BOOK THEM....INSTEAD OF TRYING TO HEDGE YOUR BETS AT THE COST OF THE LITTLE GUY!

ONE OF THE  BEST SHOW'S OF THE YEAR IN NYC IS THE BNB BOWL.  PEOPLE FLY IN FROM AROUND THE WORLD JUST TO SEE WHATS UP. YOU GET THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS.... THE UP AND COMERS  AND THE HEADLINERS.............AND NOONE IS GETTING FUCKED.

TAKE A FUCKING LESSON FORM THOSE GUYS...

ELMO

P.S.
  ONE MORE TIME FOR GOOD MEASURE -

PAY TO PLAY

  
For  most bands, playing live is an essential part of  their musical career. It gives them the chance to test out new material, play to current fans, possibly gain new ones and hopefully grow as an artist.  Clubs and bars work in many different ways as far as who they book and why, but there is an unfair practice that's growing amongst promoters that has been eroding at the foundation of how booking, promotion and playing all work together to make a strong live music scene.  What we're referring to is the practice called PAY TO PLAY.  If you're in a band you know exactly what we are talking about.  If you're not,  please continue reading, you'll all be asked to do something.

 
So, what does PAY TO PLAY mean?  Essentially what it means is that the promoter will ask you to  take a certain amount of tickets to sell on your own that you cannot return regardless of whether you've sold them or not. The amount of tickets you are required to sell can be anywhere from 20 to 100 given to you at a face value that is usually only a dollar or two cheaper than what people pay at the door. The basic idea is for the bands to guarantee that they can bring a certain number of people to the club.
  So what's the big deal right?    
  
Well, it's not unfair to ask all parties involved to help with the promotion of the show, but where things have changed significantly is that if you do not sell all of these tickets you cannot return any of them. What that basically means is that if you were asked to sell 50 tickets and got rid of only 45 and can even produce the remaining 5 to show the promoter that you haven't lost or given them away, you still owe for those tickets.  If the tickets were given to you at $10 a piece, you are expected to take that remaining $50 out of your pocket.  Guess what?  You just paid to play.

  
Now, admittedly we realize that such business practices may not exactly be tugging at your heartstrings.  We know full well that there are any number of greater issues going on in the world today that may hold your attention longer.  But being that 'live' music has been such a huge part of our lives for so long, we feel it must be said out loud instead of grumbled about in the backrooms of clubs by disgruntled bandmembers. And to be quite honest, as this was being written the ideas expressed seem to have taken on a life of their own by more than a few others. It isn't difficult these days to hear many musicians from all genres expressing the same exact frustrations in all parts of the country. Google it if you must.


  Essentially clubs and bars work in a few different ways, but if you're a clubowner you know that for the most part,  the entertainment is there to drive the bar and alcohol sales.  A fair way to compensate all involved is that the bands are paid out of the money collected at the door and the club gets revenue from the bar.  If the club is bigger they usually have to take a piece of the door, because it's a bigger operation but some revenue somewhere is put aside to pay the entertainment.  What happens in a 'PAY TO PLAY' situation is that the club is basically keeping the money made at the bar and the door. All of the money collected tends to pay the club itself and whoever got a monetary guarantee to be there.  This is usually a headlining band, possibly a dj or dancers and the promoters. A club is a business. It has a stated function and that is to make money. A clubowner or promoter has the right to make money off of the work put into the show or their investment into the club.  It would be ludicrous to think that anyone doesn't have a right to make money off of these shows.  But, having said all of that, what often happens is that there are many people getting paid along the way and the bands who are asked to sell all of those tickets are not getting paid at all which, when we break it down, are the ones who in many cases actually brought the people to the club.

 
Allow us to explain further.  A perfect example of what often happens is that a band on a national level is touring and asks for a big guarantee that the promoter or club knows they CANNOT pay.  From the years of playing live music, we know that promoters will outbid each other to get the act that they want.  The promoter will book that act so that maybe in the future they can get some act on that booking agent's roster that they really want or so they can simply drive the bar sales.  In order to make up for all of the expenses and bad business decisions they make, the smaller bands are forced to buy tickets so they can guarantee they have a certain amount of money to work off the debt they created for themselves. So, the headliner gets paid, the dj gets paid, the promoters and clubowners get paid but the small local bands are left out of the equation although they are the ones who ran around selling the tickets.

 
Ok, so if you are still asking yourself why is it such a big deal for a promoter to ask a band to guarantee a certain amount of people to show up before putting them on the show, allow us to explain another subtlety of how it all works.  If a promoter is asking you to sell tickets without being able to return them, he is not asking you how many people you can draw, the promoter is asking you how many tickets you can sell. Here's the difference.  As your band grows you are less and less in contact with the people who actually would buy your ticket from you directly.  What that means is that at first, you are selling to your closest friends but as you get bigger, people are coming that you don't have access to. But the PAY TO PLAY system forces you to either have to keep selling to your closest friends or try and find ways to drive out and meet people who might want a ticket.  So if you are asked to sell even 50 tickets and everyone you encounter wants two, that means you would have to meet on 25 different occasions.  In essence, bands are being asked to be a ticket outlet with no way to sell it other than face-to-face.  Bands we are, Ticketmaster we are NOT.

 
Most bands, big or small do not know or even have access to every single person that would possibly come and see them play.  Anyone who has a Myspace account has at least a passing familiarity with those annoying bulletins from a friend who is in a band and asks you to come to the show, but borderline begs you to buy the tickets from a band member.  In many cases, it's actually a good idea to have tickets in advance and most bands don't have a problem taking them to help with the show.  But where it becomes a lazy promotional technique on the part of the promoter is when the show itself is a local band show that has no urgency to drive the tickets and you are still held responsible for not selling all of them or you are judged solely on the tickets you've presold before the show even begins.  If a fan of yours shows up at the door, he pays a higher door price that goes to the club and it's not counted as a person YOU drew to the venue.

 
These are just a few of the reasons why it's difficult and not even cost-effective to do these shows sometimes.  At one point, it seemed to be only bigger venues testing out this policy and even with that it was only certain shows.  These days, even the smaller bars are expecting all of the acts on a show with only local bands to sell tickets to a night that most customers don't feel any urgency to buy a ticket in advance to because there is no huge headliner.  It's becoming all too frequent and for whatever reasons we can line up that show why we think it's unfair, it always seems to boil down to the same question.  Do they really think we should take money out of our pockets to be on this stage?  Of course we are expected to draw. But what if that show happens to not go well?  It brings us back to that same question...why should we be taking money out of our pockets to pay for tickets that did not sell?   Any promoter has a full right to never ask that band to play again if they don't draw well.  It's a process where you prove yourself to whoever is the person booking you.  It's become a process of buying your way onto the bill. Let's not forget that "Payola", the practice of payment by record companies for the broadcast of recordings on music radio, was outlawed years ago. This is starting to sound way too close to that.  Wikipedia it if you must.

  
Ok, so where does that leave us?  Not just the bands we mean, but anyone involved in all aspects of booking, promotion and playing.  One thing is for sure that regardless of whatever side of this debate you are on, you'll probably agree that it's harder than ever to get people to shows for plenty of reasons especially with an economic downturn and skyrocketing gas prices. With our collective experiences of booking and promoting for our own bands, we fully realize that it isn't easy to keep a club afloat or to live off of being a full time promoter.  We state the above opinions and explanations to give our side, the musicians' side, and not at all to name names or to further divide groups of people who often need each other to keep things going. The intent of this whole article is to point out to those who might not really understand where we are coming from and hope to inspire a creative change in the way we handle our bands and the way in which we are treated and seen as live artists.

    
So if you understand and agree with what we have said, we're not asking for boycotts, pickets or to donate anything we are asking you to please circulate or promote this article in any way you see fit.  Put it on your blog, or your band page or send a link to someone who might want to read it.  Or better yet, you may even want to write your own article with your ideas outlined.  In any case, we hope it's opened some eyes, ears and minds.
 
  
     Thanks for your time.

      Keith 'elmo' Franco -Southpaw
      George Reynolds - Mind Over Matter / Revenge of the Dragon

P.S.---We leave you with inspirational words from a song written over 25 years ago by HR and the BAD BRAINS, its called PAY TO CUM, 'nuff said.



Pay To Cum

                                        I make decision with precision
                                        Lost inside this manned collision
                                        Just to see that what is to be
                                        Perfectly my fantasy

                                        I came to know with now dismay
                                        That in this world we all must pay
                                        Pay to write, pay to play
                                        Pay to cum, pay to fight

                                        And all in time,
                                        With just our minds
                                        We soon will find
                                        What's left behind

                                        Not long ago when things were slow
                                        We all got by with what we know
                                        The end is near.
Hearts filled with fear
                                        Don't want to listen to what they hear

                                        And so it's now we choose to fight
                                        To stick up for our bloody right
                                        The right to sing, the right to dance
                                        The right is ours... We'll take the chance

                                         A peace together
                                         A piece apart
                                         A piece of wisdom
                                         From our hearts
2:58  
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vendredi, septembre 26, 2008 

Humeur actuelle :  en éveil
I have a little fact checking piece that CNN did, from youtube.com ,on here from a Sarah Palin speech, as well as one that takes a poke at McCain for his last minute pull-out of a Dave Letterman show appearance, also from youtube.com.

Its kinda funny, McCain thinks by canceling his debate and live appearances on tv shows, he can be the "ONE MAN ARMY ATTACKING THE BUDGET CRISIS"  and this will win over voters.
Or could it be that he feels he is already beginning a steady slide in the poles so he needs to take a break from campaigning before he is embarrassed and uses his hero rhetoric regarding "being locked in a cage for 5 plus years..." every time he is stumped by a hard question, or doesn't feel like answering?
Don't get me wrong, I do not question his his heroic actions during the Vietnam war, just his use of this story in these sticky situations.
By the way, if you cant handle the pressure of a political campaign AND working on the budget problems with your team, how the heck are you going to run this country???
I will bet on any given day you will have at least 2 things to do at once.
I feel like this is just another ploy (like nominating a young, somewhat attractive woman to be vice-president after seeing how many votes Hillary got) for the republican party to try and shift light from the real issues and truth just like the last election when they used "scare tactics" and the 9/11 attacks on people to scare them into thinking voting democrat would be the end of all life in the U.S.A.
This was also the reason so many states now have massive security budgets, in the middle of nowhere, while cities and states that are more prone to terrorist threats and attack, like my city (NYC), have insufficient funding to come close to being a secure place.
It's getting a little old, hearing politicians use the attacks of September 11th 2001, to try and scare the average person into voting for their own political agenda.
Its also a disgrace to those that died and their families.
Anyway, there is so much more I can rant about on this subject but I will stop for now and get to the video clips.

Here is the Palin "fact checking video"






Here is the Letterman video

3:50  
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dimanche, septembre 14, 2008 

Humeur actuelle :  vexé

OK, so this is a new blog celebrating the lives of those people you see out in the street or during everyday life that you want to bash in the head with a tack hammer. Hope you enjoy.
Johnny Drunkerton

3/13/06

1.) Whats up with the full grown adults on the subway, all bundled up for winter and wearing a hat that is made to look like the stuffed animal head of a wolf or some other furry woodland creature? Are you some learning disabled jackass or is your fashion sense just that fucking bad?

I found an asshole wearing one and actually had her take my picture so I could mock the hat and those that wear them. Talk about your messed up mother fockers!!! I cant believe I did it either.


2) Whats up with the jackass that is walking on a stairway in the NYC subway during rush hour and decides "Now is the time I need to stop and count my change in my purse and or pocket, or just plain decide to do my taxes". AND ITS ALWAYS IN FRONT OF ME!!! I am tired of being nice to these people and think if you are that stupid to do this then you must be thrown down the stairs, I am sure you wont be missed.

2a) Whats up with the idiot that decides during rush hour, again on the subway, to bring a bicycle, baby carriage filled with groceries, or 4  small children they cant even keep track of and are screaming? Are you that fucking stupid??? I see you doing the same thing all the time!!! UGH!!!

3) Whats up with the guy in the car in front of you that at the last possible moment, while doing 70 MPH decides to slam on the brakes and change lanes or exit? You deserve to die in a fiery car wreck!! But chances are you will probably just kill someone else and escape unharmed.

4) Whats up with the jackass that comes in your bar at like 3:45 AM and decides to have "a quick drink", orders a drink straight up then sips the thing for 25 minutes??? ITS A FUCKIN SHOT, DRINK IT THE FUCK DOWN AND GET THE FUCK OUT!!!!

4/11/06

5) What is up with the OBVIOUS crack-head trying to come into your bar to sell shit to buy more crack?!?!?!
Seriously, the guy looks like Tyrone Bigguns and walks in then proceeds to pull like 30 tubes of opened paint from his pocket to sell people... "I am an artist..."
yup a fuckin bullshit artist!!!
NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY BAR YOU THIEVING CRACK-HEAD!!!!

6) Whats going on with the drunken idiot that does something majorly stupid in your bar then decides its a good idea to get in your face and try to explain and say sorry. Once you have been thrown out of a bar, tuck your tail between your legs and leave like the asshole you are!!!
Try explaining to your friends why they are now out in the street buzzed and wanting more because you were an asshole and got them all thrown out.

6a) This kinda goes along the lines of 6, hence the *a.
When you are drunk in a bar and there is a delivery guy with food at the bar (*VERY IMPORTANT FACT) That ISNT Yours!!! Dont even think about taking it!!! This may very well be the Manager, bar-back, and Bouncer's Food. In which case you and everyone else involved in eating it will be thrown out in the street like trash.
Yup, we threw out an entire birthday party last weekend for doing this at my bar and we hadnt eaten all day, all 3 of us were so pissed and starving!!!

 

10/23/07

7) Why is it when you are nice enough to let a regular customer in the bar at the last minutes of the night they are always a problem??? I will tell you why. Because the jackasses were out drinking, and spending all thier money at some other bar, got thrown out for what ever reason and decided they should have one last drink and annoy the people that know them as "regulars". Thats why. Well from now on, FUCK YOU!!! I am tired of being Mr. Nice Guy to people that continuously take advantage of my kindness. Yes, I know with a blog like this its hard to see me as Mr. Nice Guy but yes, I am quite the sweet heart you douchebag!!!

8) Why is it when half the bar is interested in watching a certain game on the tvs Mr. Jackass comes along and requests you to put on ESPN 8 to watch womens curling or thumb wrestling and then turns into the biggest asshole if you say NO? OK, so I should piss off most of the bar for your selfish think-for-yourselfer ass??? Thanks for stiffing me on the tip. Guess what, we never forget you assholes. Beware when you try and get your next drink! wink wink

9) This was a new benchmark in stupidity. When you and your other little french asshole friend are drunk and its the end of the night, dont start an argument with the angry black man carrying a gun in his pants. I then have to throw you 2 to the ground while I wrestle a man with a gun out the door of my bar before he shoots you... or me because Im in his way!!! YOU DICKS!!!

10) If you cant keep your head up off the bar, or table you are sitting at, because you are too drunk, or as you assholes always put it "Im just really tired" GO THE FUCK HOME!!! What point is there of you being out in that condition?!?!?! I dont feel like carrying your vomit covered ass out of my bar because you decided to stay till you passed out. Thats why you also shouldnt "pre-game" with a bottle of booze before you even get to the bar. God damn amatuers!!!

9/14/08

11. Why is it every time I walk through Penn Station, there is a tiny little girl, or boy, that thinks walking fast and swinging their arms is a good idea?

Seriously... Your little hands make for great weapons of testicular destruction!!!

If you are in a rush, try to walk fast and not swing your arms around like a jack-ass because some of us have testicles in the area you find so comfortable to swing in. I find myself dodging more fists for this reason than I do, dodging umbrellas on the side walk when it rains here in NYC. And, dont get me started on the eye gouging assholes on that matter....

I will add to this list more all the time, I see a lot of stupid shit in my daily routines as well as do some myself. lol
Hope you enjoy and keep reading them. *subscribe* hint hint

Actuellement Je regarde:
Constantine (2-Disc Deluxe Edition with Comic Book)
Date de publication : 19 July, 2005
10:20  
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mardi, août 26, 2008 
I would like to take this opportunity to thank the "Rumblers" NYC chapter for the fantastic hot rod show and hospitality this past weekend.
I had a real blast there and, ran into some great friends I had not seen in a while.
The party has gotten so big so fast, just like the motors you boys roll with!!!
I also want to thank the local chapter for bringing the other hot rod hooligans from New Mexico, Florida, Cali, and friends from all over, to Doc Holliday's Sunday night to party with Meridith and I.
We had a great time with you girls and boys there too!!!
You are all welcome to come visit us anytime and the door is always open.
After getting some bad news Thursday night I needed some cheering up and, I got to party at your place all afternoon on Saturday and got to see a mosh pit at 3:45 AM in a country bar on Sunday.
The weekend was priceless and, exactly what the doctor ordered.
So, thanks again and I posted some of the pics from the show on here in my photo album. Its titled "Rumblers 08" for you retards that cant figure out the obvious.
Later,
Johnny
12:59  
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vendredi, août 08, 2008 

Humeur actuelle :  vexé

Ok, so I was just sitting around and came up with a new idea for my blogs. It will be one of those blogs I add to on a regular basis so you will have to check it out on a regular basis. Hope you enjoy it and I will try and keep the humor going.
This is a blog about the random thoughts that just pop into your head and things you think about but are either too embarrassed to talk about or your friends just wouldnt want to hear it.

1/30/06

1) Did you ever take a shit and think to yourself..." When the fuck did I eat that?"

2) If I were a doctor the MD would stand for M ost D runk

3) If I were a Mexican wrestler my special move would be the Gato Taco. Although this may be my name too, I havent decided on it yet.

4) I was just wondering if I may have a job planting Tulips...on yours. (I know that was cheezy and was a suggestion by a friend of mine, as a job I may have if I wanted.)

5) If I were to walk to the store for more beer I would sober up from the walk, but if I stay home I will sober up from not drinking. Damn Decisions.

6) Which came first the chicken or the egg??? I dont remember fuckin either one!!!

7) Everyone keeps telling me they know how to make stuff from "scratch". Now I am a chef, I know my shit, and I have never found this "scratch" in any store. Is it a black market item? Is there a guy in a dark alley with a trunk full of "scratch" to buy on the down low? I want to know about this "scratch" dealer, apparently, whenever they make something from "scratch", its the best too.

8) My dishes are really piled up and it made me think... I miss having a dish washer.  Fuckin Immigration laws!!! Dragged him outta here and left me with a pile of dirty dishes.

2/2/06

9) Do I wanna meet other Christians?  I cant take the ones I know now. Fuckin AdSpace!!!

10) Did you ever have anyone tell you they had a BIG cheezy grin on thier face? Well I love cheez, and think it would be funny to eat the cheez from said persons teeth!!! (visually hysterical)

11) When your mom and you havent spoken in over a month, its nice to pick up right where you left off. Just shut up and go with it, having a mom and a friend around is much better than nothing. Glad to have her crazy ass back!!!

2/3/06

12) THE GUY THAT INVENTED TEQUILA SHOULD BE KILLED!!!

2/4/06

13) Late at night, on Fridays and Saturdays, Penn Station resembles a Homeless Shelter / Vomitorium.

14) When your band is done playing, GET THE FUCK OFF THE STAGE AND TAKE YOUR EQUIPMENT WITH YOU!!! I hate when people act as if they are the fucking mayor of whoville when they finish playing. Take your pictures and drink with your friends after you get your shit off the stage!

15) Its funny when you are walking down the street near the "college kid" bars and its around 2:45 AM and you see all the hipsters and hotties outside the bar and the hotty chicks are puking all over their own expensive trendy shoes.
Pace yourselves youngin' !!!!  HA HA

16) Its cool when you are looking for another job and a friend you havent talked to in a while calls you out of the blue and gives you a job. YAY

17) I LOVE "LOVE"!!! And when it is returned it is truly wonderful !!! Thanks Babe.

2/6/06

18) Its funny how things work out the way they are meant to be. One way or the other.YAY for the new job!!!

19)  Always print a confirmation of anything you buy on line. Fuckin internet!!! Its only good for finding old friends you havent seen in years and porn. lol

2/9/06  

20) Its great when you actually take a nap after workin and you only slept like 2 hours the night before and your friends 2 year old daughter decides your name is now Juan. Yes, I am Juan. I was referred to as Juan for 2 days now by my friends daughter who calls me John, but only when she first wakes up. lol 
But it gets better... she refers to cookies as nookie.
So... I am Juan and she keeps asking me if I want nookie. (thats what she calls cookies)
So fuckin cute!!!

21) I look fuckin' awesome at 5:30AM in my friends "predator" dreadlocks and a mexican wrestling mask!!! Dont worry, pics will be posted soon!!! I am sure you will agree!!!

2/10/06

22) If there's a big patch of ice on a turn when you are driving... DONT FLOOR IT AROUND THE TURN!!! I slid and scared the shit outta my friends right before they got on the plane. I said, "At least you dont have to worry about crashing now, I got you through it already!!!"

23) If you are all about the "LOVE" in your life, dont put all your eggs in one basket. You are sure to make a mother fuckin omlet!!!! Please pass the bacon.

24) If you are drunk, dont write blogs, you are sure to piss someone off... somewhere, some time.

25) Dont drink and hit things, they often break certain important parts of your body... or at least make them very sore.
Happy birthday to me and a very happy Valentine's day to all!!!

2/16/06  MY BIRTHDAY BITCHES!!

26) When your friend is taking a piss in his bathroom with the door open and there are a bunch of people in the room. Make sure you dont jump on his back if someone is behind the door.
Someone got a facefull of wood!!! LOL Holly-WOOD!!!
Sorry had to say it. lol

27) When you say you are going to "take it easy" tonight, always laugh when those words cross your lips. We were banging drinks during dinner then straight to the bar, closed the bar, then brought everyone home with us and got stewed even more.

28) It is always funny when you strip down and take a bubble bath in the middle of people hanging around at your friends house. I havent had a bubble bath in years either. WHAT THE FUCK MAKES A DRUNKEN IDIOT DECIDE AT LIKE 3:30 AM THAT HE NEEDS A BUBBLE BATH?!?!?!
Anyway, it was a jacuzi tub so that might have had something to do with it.

29) When you are getting tattoed, its always good to make sure your unprovoked fit of laughter comes at a time when you arent getting inked. OMG I just started laughing for no reason in the middle of a tattoo for like 5 minutes. It was really funny. I think it might have been a remnant from last night, like I was supposed to laugh at something really funny and didnt then it came out today. Who knows, I was pretty fuckin drunk... AGAIN!!!

2/17/06

30) Remember when I said to always laugh when you say you are gonna "take it easy tonight" you should always laugh? Well, I found this is definately the way to go. It worked much better last night. Tonight I am definately gonna take it easy though. No really. I am only gonna drink beer. I swear!  *crossed fingers

2/19/06

31) Its always funny when you receive messages from a stalker and she tried to bother you and your friends but the problem is.... you sent her an email warning her of impending prosecution for harassment and stalking and she feels like sending you mindless crap, again and again but... she cant receive it due to her blocking your incoming stuff.
Oh well... at least I tried to warn her. Its funny when someone spends more time on here trying to fuck with you then you actually spent with them in real life.
I am a loser? lol

32) Ok, so the party is over and Johnny Drunkerton is now going on a vacation from the booze. Call it a "trial seperation".
I am going to stay sober till next weekend now, not to mention I am workin all but like 3 days for the rest of the month. I hope you all enjoyed the festivities as well as the birthday party.
Thanks to all that partied in SoDak as well as everyone who came out in support of the Birth of Drunkerton. Had a great time with everyone and we will do it again, promise. Oh and by the way, I only had *1* shot while I was out the other day, I swear. So I managed to take it easy my last night there. See you all again soon. I may feel the need for a trip to the hat or nutty's real soon.

3/3/06

33) I learned a new phrase today from a scholar... "absence make the heart grow more pissed off!!!"

34) Since I love croisants and hate the french I am now changing the name of croisants to "creepy croutons". I find that to be much better for me, and funny as well.

35) When trying to make shelving, it helps to have the battery charger for your tools. I now have 2 dead batteries and a whole bunch of cordless tools that I cant use and a shitload of stuff sitting on the floor. I lent it to someone and they lost it. Grrreat

36) I hate when you finally have new jobs and are making great money and you do your finances and it turns out you are still gonna be broke for about another month due to backed up shit.
Nice hole I dug. lol You can call me the shoveller.

37) Its always a pleasure to move into a new place thats bigger and nicer and you realize that with the amount of time you are now working you dont have enough hours in the week to fix the place up or finish the stuff you already started.

38) Sleep is definately not over-rated. I just had my first anxiety attack in like 10 years and I am a mess. lol  I need someone to make more hours in a week so I can get some rest now. I am workin 6 days a week at my jobs and on the house when I am not workin.

41) I posted 2 more entries earlier and they never popped up on here. I dont even remember what they were other than 39 and 40.

42) When you go from drinking like a rock star almost every night to working every night, your tolerance isnt going to be as high.
I started drinking around 5 or 6 this afternoon, *my morning, and didnt eat much. I feel like a train wreck.
Holy Shit!!! I cant remeber the last time I was drunk this fast. Damn, its 2:45 and I am now home and bombed. lol
Hope you all had a good night too. I sure did and missed my friends more than I thought!!! Good times. Good times. lol
Now its movie time in my new living room/cinema.

4/12/06

43) I like sweet and sour soup...

I never really did before but I tried it from this really good chinese place near my job and now I do, but only from there. I cannot see its appeal though, or how it would even have been thought up.
Most food is done in a way where there is some "nice presentation" or something visually stimulating about it or even have a great smell.
This food has NOTHING going for it.
1- it has the consistency of Dick Snot
2- it looks like a dirty aquarium
3- it smells like shit
4- refer to the previous 3 entries.
So why and how in the name of all thats yummy do I like it or even think of putting it in my mouth??? That sounds soo gay. lol
Anyway, like I said random thoughts....

4/20/06

44) Kankles...
Thats right, I am gonna rant about fuckin Kankles!!!!
OK, if you have kankles and cant decide what to wear, let me just help you with that...
DONT WEAR ANYTHING THAT SHOWS OFF YOUR FUCKIN ANKLES!!!
Its disgusting to look at your knees that continue down to your feet!!!
Really, it is!!!
I find the leg most disgusting when it has NO CURVE and so do most people that look down and see your kankles!!!!

45) OK... Hip Huggers..
Where to begin???
You idiots that think " Maybe I should wear these jeans that barely cover my VAGINA... Yeah, thats what I'll wear..."
You are an ASSHOLE!!!
You now left the house wearing pants that are too small and your fat ass is sticking out and they are cutting the fat in half at your waist... YOU ARE AN ASS!!!
There are a select few that can pull this manuver off and you arent one of them.
It is usually the 14 year old mexican girl I see doing this on the train but there are many of you clueless idiots out there.
I will gladly give you a dollar to buy a clue or you can see me and I will give you FREE advice. lol
FUCK, I cant stand that shit.
It was like the spandex fad... its a priveledge, not a right!!!
Just because you are a girl doesnt mean that you can rock the hip huggers!!!
Dont get me wrong...there are a lot of girls that look good in them but...
NOT EVERYONE!!!

4/21/06

46) OK, now on to another sore subject for me...
Chicks with NO MANNERS
I was working tonight, as always, and saw this girl eating at my bar. She was kinda pretty and was sitting alone. She left for a few minutes and returned with pizza.
I was then looking over in her direction and noticed her eating.... OM FUCKING  G!!!!
She was chomping on this pizza like a horse with her mouth open wide for every bite. It was thoroughly disgusting!!!
I then realized why she was sitting alone, I then started imagining all the other gross stuff she must do too...
Does she sit in a skirt with legs spread while picking her nose? Does she scratch the cooch in public's view?
Fart in a room full of people and act like nothing happened?
Then came the biting of the toe nails....
OK, sorry to have made you think of all the gross shit that popped into my head but let it go as a warning to all you girls out there... be carefull how "relaxed" you may be in public, there is always someone that may be looking at you and this is what they have pop in their head when they see you do something gross.

47) Perfection... This is a hard level of living to acheive.
If and when I, or anyone I know, reaches this level let me know. I want to see what its like.
Apparently people think because I make comical, humorous comments I must think I am perfect.
I on the other hand am not nor do I think am anything close to perfection. Being confident and compitent are not being  conceited nor are they a sign that I think I am perfect.
However, no matter how flawed someone may be, there is someone out there that will think you are perfect with those flaws and all that come with them.
Remember the song... "I love you just the way you are..."
Everyone is perfect to someone.

4/22/06

48) When you arent hungry but in the mood for mexican @
4:30 AM, just because your co workers are ordering Mexican, dont pile the green chile peppers on your burrito. OMG my whole face was on fire, then it was all numb like I sucked an 8 ball through a straw in my mouth, (*I know the feeling lol)
then it went away for a while and now my fucking stomach is like a ball of flames.
Yup, we now call it... "puttin the STUPID SAUCE on your food" I am a fuckin retard.

49) If I tell you NOT to stand in the waitress station at my bar I find it better to listen to me the first time I tell you.
Secondly, if you act like a dick about it, not move till the 3rd time I ask, and then decide to spit your gum on the waitress' tray... This was the funny part, I will then let you stay in my bar and not even tell you about how I picked up the tray and dropped your own gum in your hair.
Yup, call it "ASSHOLE TAX"  you fuckin dick.
Real fuckin classy.

50) The new TOOL single is FUCKING AWESOME!!!
If you have a chance to listen to it, definately check it out ASAP!!!  "10,000 DAYS"

51) Dreaming you are in Hawaii with someone you barely talk to anymore is really weird. Especially when you wake up and can smell the beach and the person you were with. WEIRD!!!

52) Planning a vacation and then staying home working 12 hour shifts instead SUCKS!!! I am really getting burnt out.

4/26/06

53) Finding Valentine's Day cards you bought for someone but never got to give them sucks.

54) Honey Nut Cheerios are just as YUMMY as I remember. lol I love having breakfast every once in a while.

4/27/06

55) OK, this one is gonna use a little setting up.
At 2 bars I work at we have a game where we try to make each other look somewhere below the waist to give each other the finger. Stupid game but funny none the less, and its been getting to the point where if the bar was on fire and you tried to show someone, they wouldnt look so... Last night I brought in a stunt double for myself...My boy Sean.
The other manager tried to get me to look at a note he wanted to give to my celebrity friend and I told him "no go give it to him yourself." What he didnt know is that I told Sean about the game and that when he brought the note back and tried to give it to him just have his middle finger out around his pocket so...
Having Stiffler give your co-manager the finger as part of the game and having the other manager not knowing he was playing was fuckin funny as shit. Sorry, it was really funny to see the other manager start screaming "NOOOOOOOO!!!!" in the middle of the bar because I caught him soo bad.

56) You cant please everyone all the time and I am the one least often pleased. grrrr

57) Yes. I meant it about the word "hella" It SUCKS!!!

4/28/06

58) MMMMMMMMMMMMM BEER

59) Why is it that when I am running late to work there is always some asshole that decides to stop HALF WAY down the fucking escalator in the subway??? There is a mess of people that get stuck behind this ass and they are always oblivious to the crowd of people stuck behind them. God Damn annoying!!!
Why do you stand in the middle of the stairs too??? Do you really think its the best place to block the run or should I just bowl you the fuck over?????  GRRRRRRR FUCKER!!!!
Made me 15 minutes late when I missed my train!!!

4/29/06

60) OK... So I am now wondering this insane fucking idea that some asshole is in charge of deciding what color and what styles are the "IN" thing for the season.
I have been seeing all these girls wearing SAFETY FUCKING ORANGE!!!
What the fuck is up with that??? Are you kidding me? Safety Orange?!?!?!
Is that the new whatever color for the spring?
What asshole decided this?
Said asshole thinking..."I cant think of what color to make the "IT" color this spring and they have all been used... OH, I KNOW... SAFETY ORANGE!!!" 
You friggin idiot!!!
How many people read these magazines and dont think for themselves?
I have seen soo many girls wearing this color in the last few days and I cant beleive it.
Its reeeediculous!!!
I have some advice for ya, this comes from the heart too... WEAR WHATEVER MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD AND WHAT EVER MAKES YOU HAPPY!!!
Johnny D.

61) Marathons SUCK!!! I have 2 friends stuck at my house because there is a marathon going through my hood for a few hours and so.. No one is gettin any sleep, no one is gettin outta here, and no one is gonna be well rested for work tomorrow night. *MEANING ME lol

5/16/06

62) Carrying a pizza, a huge thingy of flowers, and a 12 pack of beer, while drunk as shit and in a torrential down pour      @ 6 am is no easy task. 

63) Waking up after more than 7 hours of sleep for the first time in nearly 2 weeks is really awesome... But I was still kinda drunk. lol                                                                    I have been getting no more than 3 hours of sleep a day for a week and a half, if not more.

64) Pizza for breakfast when hungover... still a great meal.

5/19/06

65) THUNDER IS FUCKIN LOUD!!!! I went to sleep a few hours ago and the thunder storm that is going on is so furocious and loud it woke me out of a booze induced coma. I hope I can get back to sleep. lol

66) So now its 2 hours later... Storms gone, the bay looks beautiful. It looks like glass and all the sail boats and trees are reflecting on it... AND I AM STILL FUCKIN AWAKE AND HAVE TO WORK AGAIN TONIGHT!!!!!! ARG!!!

67) Neither sex, nor sleep are over rated. I havent had either in a while and I do have to say they are definately missed. lol Well I have had sleep but only in small doses.

68) When tired dont try to sleep with a rambunctious pit bull running around your house. He has been jumping on me with his tennis ball that he has chewed in a way that the fuzzy stuff is just hanging off it from a few strands on one end and it is all slimey and mushy. YUCK!!! Its also broken so it keeps making a popping sound every time he bites down on it. At least I know when he is coming towards me. lol  But he is soo cute. Gotta go walk him now. BYE

69) heh heh 69 heh heh

70) I can probably put this on my "I hate that" blog but...I will put it here too since it is that random and serious a matter at the same time. I hate it when you are hungry and you cant think of what you want to eat, yet someone other than you and in another house, has decided its time to make succulent, sweet smelling, food of the gods, I wanna eat it every meal BACON!!! I can smell it in my house and want to find where its coming from and kick the door in and help myself to ALL their bacon!!! Yup... SMASH...Dont mind me, just here for the bacon. Nobody moves, nobody gets hurt!!!

71) OK so remember that thunderstorm and how it woke me up??? Well I put on a DVD and decided to try and catch a little shut eye and as soon as my eyes closed     ..........BOOOOM...........  MORE THUNDER STORMS!!! YAY!!!  Now I love thunderstorms for many reasons, and they are an immense turn on to me but, now I have to work 10 hours on just an hour and 45 minutes sleep. AGAIN!!!  This shits gotta stop!!!

72) I hope I can finish moving in one day so I can sleep on Tuesday when I am off.

5/23/06

73) Friends that come help you out with stuff on no notice even if you havent seen them or talked much in months are the best. My boy little Stevie came by straight from work and worked with me till 10:30 at night. And my other friend Karina totally hooked me up with the extra vehicle and another set of hands as well for the move. Nothing like some moral support as well. I also want to thank my boy Nikki X, even though he didnt make it over to help but that was my fault. I planned nothing except the days I was moving and shit got twisted. lol I will be having a nice afternoon BBQ in the near future, most of my friends work nights or are independantly wealty so they dont work. lol I am gonna make a nice day of it. I will let you know as soon as I get the kegorator in the house we are gonna do it. I am gonna juggle my schedule and take an extra day off here and there since I only have one off in the next 6 weeks. I actually gave away next Tuesday already. I dont wanna have my stuff laying around all the time so I need to make time to put everything away and look nice. Still not sleeping there though, too much shit laying around and I forgot an important part of my bed frame. DUMB ASS!!! lol

74) You have to check out this video, I got it from Harlequinn one of the greatest and bestest people in all the land. There hasnt been a good reference to her on here in a while and I have been lacking in comedic fodder due to not seeing her in ages soooo, here is her gift for the day. Thanks babe.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSJ8gUsaJuo

75) It helps when you move to make sure shit fits through the door before taking it up the narrow stairway. lol I didnt have the patience and wound up having to leave the couch outside all night in the driveway because I had to dismantle the door to get it in and didnt know where the tools were. lol

5/27/06

76) OK... I have been back in the bar life, *working again, for the last 6 months. Tonight was the first time I have had to beat the shit out of someone in years. I think the hardest part about it was RESTRAINT!!! How do you go from being a kid brought up in one of the toughest cities in the world, fighting all the time, to being a grown up who respects others and tries *NOT to have violence in their life, to someone who when faced with a problem and there is no alternative other than violence, tries not to beat someone??? It was the weirdest thing to be in that situation and not break this fucking asshole's jaw loose from his head. I was quite nice about the whole thing and actually only slammed him, REALLY FUCKING HARD, on the ground before dragging him out of my bar by his head. Needless to say I tossed him around like a rag doll BUT... it was weird not to have thrown a punch.  I guess growing up does change some stuff. lol *lucky for him. He hit the floor like a bag of bricks thrown out a 4th floor window. Anyway, it was just a weird feeling. If you want the story, say so. I will blog it tomorrow or something.

5/30/06

77) ok...so here it is. If you are in the NYC or going to be here in the near future, you have to go to the Double Down Saloon. I am a HUGE fan of the Bacon! Doesnt matter what flavor, what brand, what ever. ITS FUCKIN BACON YOU ASSHOLE!!! OK... sorry. Anyway, I went in today and saw my friend for just a few minutes and managed to taste for myself what Bacony goodness of the gods is to taste like. It comes in the form of a Bacon Bloody Mary. Now I know this may seem gross to you, I even thought it was a little gross but then sucked it up for the love of swine. I tried this drink and for the entire night wished I had an I.V. of them in my arm.

So, if you are interested, you must check this place out. Doesnt matter when or how, JUST GET THERE!!! (*try to do it when Alison is workin though, she is my home girl.)

Double Down Saloon Ave A between Houston and 2nd (or 1st, not sure how the wedge runs right there.)

6/2/06

78) It helps if you actually remember how and when you got home from the night/ morning before. Holy Shit, I woke up in my moms house in my old bedroom, which is now an office, drunk as shit at 4:30 in the afternoon. Holy Crap!!! I remember leaving work, going over to Snitch, drinking half a bottle of some poor kids vodka (*hey never offer to a complete stranger, you never know if hes a lush.) then went to the black and blue fetish ball, then I went to after hours with some friends on worth street then I know I got kicked out of there but no idea what time and things start to get a little fuzzy. I remember getting on a train going somewhere, then getting off at 59st then I remember walking a little bit in flushing , to the bus stop and doing so VERY stumble-ish, then just waking up. No focking clue how I got here. weird stuff.

6/5/06

79) Why is it when I get up and start my day saying " I have soo much important stuff to do on-line, I'm just gonna check my emails on myspace real quick..." I always get sucked in for like at least an  hour?

80) How come when I am looking to see if there is anything cool going on I always have one "bored" friend that decided to post 800 bulletins of almost no importance. Yes chicky, you made my blog. lol  * I have been guilty of this myself once or twice so I am not being a jerk, just breaking balls.

81) Why is it when you are doing important stuff  that requires more than one person, and make plans with people to help, they have plans they didnt know about when they told you they would help? Oh well.

7/7/06

82) If 6/6/06 was devil day or hell night or what ever... Is 7/7/07 the day of god or some shit? Are all the Jesus freaks and religious people gonna have parties and concerts and get really high on virgin marys or something???

83) Nothing says hottness and class like walking down the street slowly in a wife beater trying to pop a zit on your chest. YUMMY

84) Its great when your co-pilot is a drunken pit bull. Every time I put down a pint glass of beer it would disappear. lol Like father like son.

85) Falling asleep while your walking is fun!!! I was soo tired last night I nodded out while walking to the bathroom and walked into the door frame. Good thing it was there or I woulda woke up when my face hit the toilet or the floor.

86) Falling asleep on the couch while watching a movie with a friend is really nice...until your friend has a fitfull dream and kicks you in the face. I woke up, still sitting up with remote in hand, and the sting of a kung-fu kick to the nose still fresh on my face.

87) So yeah, every now and then I get the privledge of seeing an ID with a great name on it. Todays great name was "Richard Gay." Yup, I swear. Dick Gay must have been real popular in high school. That was almost as good as the time I had Bob Cox. I wish his middle name was something with an "N"  Bob-n-Cox. lol

88) Working in the heat all day around the house and running errands, then working 12 hours makes for very heavy eye lids towards the end of your shift. What was I thinking staying up from 9:30 AM??? At least I got a lot of stuff done today.

89) Make sure you bought the same pants you tried on in the store BEFORE you tare the tags off to wear them. I grabbed the wrong pair on the way out of the fitting room and they are baggy and too long. UGH!!!

90) If "RockStar" energy drink was a drug... I would be the rock star of Junkies!!!

91) Its soo original and funny when you ask someone for ID and they say something like "Im as old as dirt" and you check thier ID and its like 1983. Are you fucking kidding me??? I have albums and clothes older than you!!! Here's a good question for ya, Did you ever change a type writer ribbon? dick

92) I ned to find a job in the hat making industry. This way I can say I am in "Haberdashery" I love that word.

93) I hate it when you think you made it to your stop on the subway just in time to catch your connecting bus only to get stuck waiting in the tunnel just before the platform... just long enough to miss your connecting bus and the next one isnt for 45 minutes from when you finally get off the train.

94) I deny the scurrilous charges of shit-headedry!!! This because I dispise ungallant utterances.

95) When A nerdy lookin guy walks into your bar and his accountant friends call out to him in unison and he does the "raise the roof" gesture.... Fill in your own conclusion. UGH!!! I am still shaking my head at this one in utter disbeleif.

7/14/06

96) Why is it when a baseball player gets a hit or a pitcher gets a win they are looking up, making the sign of the cross and they thank god? The best players only get a hit about a third of the time and pitchers only get a win in about a third or a little better of their starts...Does this mean that the other 2 thirds of the time they are secretly cursing god or just begging him for a break some time soon???

97) Why is it that whenever I stand outside my bar I instantly become "MapQuest.com" Seriously!!! I give people directions all over town and they are soo trusting of my bar and restraunt opinions and suggestions as well. lol  Well, I am honest about them, I really am. And if you know me, you know sometimes I can be brutally honest. lol

98) Why are New Yorkers soo spoiled??? Really, I wanna know. I went to watch the July 4th fireworks here in NYC, the biggest most expensive fireworks display known to man, and afterwards thought... "That coulda been soo much better." The fireworks really were A LOT better until a few years ago. Now they were mediocre at best. ***for NYC standards.

99) If I am at my bar standing right next to a big sign that states "EVERYONE MUST SHOW ID TO ENTER" Why do people constantly laugh or gasp when I ask them for it?  And its always the idiot that just turned 22 or 23 and acts like they have been coming to your bar for 10 years...

100) One of the cool things about my job is that I get to watch the transformation from sober to completely sloppy. Its funny... Whether you are a suit or a long haired death hippie, such as myself, We're all the same. Its just fun to watch it from the other side of the shot glass for a change.And yes, I will mess with you. lol

101) Why must girls shriek when they play pool or darts??? Its soo seriously annoying!!! Cant you have a good time without the damn shrieking??? Jerks

102) Sharting or fooping is only funny when it doesnt happen to you.

7/18/06

103) If you are really wasted, why do you try and have a "deep" and or "meaningful" conversation with anyone. Its just pointless. But I do have some deep feelings... lol 

8/01/06

104) A funny thing happened the other night near my house... A truck carrying cruise missles, for the good ole U.S. of A, rolled over on the expressway. How sweet is that?  For a change our missles closed down a highway without killing anyone!!! YAY!!!

105) "You could have 6 million termites in your house and not even know it untill you go to get something to eat and bust through the floor." M. Ali

9/16/06

106) Blah blah blah, still up, no sleep, slept like a few hours so far this week, blah blah, comment comment. Hope you enjoyed. Sobriety sucks and whom ever invented it should be beaten mercilously!!! So now Im gettin FUCKED UP!!! Because Ive been sober (*with the exception of a couple stragler beers) for 4 days, Its that time!!! LATER BITCHES!!!

3/07/08

107) Did you ever notice, if Frank Wood is on your friends list, 80 fucking percent of your bulletins are from Frank Wood. I didnt think he would have that much time with all the internet porn to have another hand free long enough to work on bulletins!!! You dirty ol' bastard! I still love ya though. Fighting the good fight.

108) Pulling your keys out of your pocket as you get out of the elevator at 3 am is not a good idea. My dumb ass dropped them into the abyss from 18 stories up.

5/20/08

109. Apparently when I cut my hair off, "I lost something, like Samson... but it wasn't my strrength, it was my SANITY."   Thanks HQ

110. "When lifting heavy objects, bend your legs and lift.
Dont use your back.
Even something that is not that heavy can throw your back out." Now, have you heard that before? I have and, I still did it a couple weeks ago. Threw my back out for the second time in as many months. I need a back-E-ot-omy!!!

111. When you have off, enjoy your days off. I just realized this...
Since I work all different nights, in bars, and before this I was working 6 or 7 days a week for Harley Davidson, I have not had a "weekend" to look forward to with friends in many years.
It was either a working weekend or, I already worked in bars on the weekend nights so I would only see my friends if they came to see me in my bars. WOW, this revelation sucks!!! Now, this is also something that I have tried to tell you all before. Its not just about the money, I ONLY GET TO SEE YOU GUYS WHEN IM WORKING!!! Its depressing.

6/19/08


112. Apparently, according to Meridith, I have Gargamel hands. Go smurf yourself Mer!!!

113. Why is it that I can be working, have an entire bar packed with drunken fools and, after they all leave and there is just a few people hanging out, everything that can go wrong does? I had someone throw up in the mens room, the toilet over-flow in the ladies room, and another person knock over, and break, a couple beer bottles all at the same time. Everything was fine when we were busy and then all hell breaks loose!!!

114. Why do I keep forgetting to change my profile song? I have had Maino on there for weeks and the joke has been over for a while.

115. I am convinced, sobriety is an often talked about myth.

8/8/08

116. Why is it when a sick, piece of shit person molests a child and gets caught they go to jail and when a priest does it, they get sent to a new church with all new kids to touch??? Didnt we seperate church from state many many years ago? I guess when they seperated them, they meant from the laws that apply to others.

 

I add to this blog on a much more frequent basis but have been workin a lot and not online as much so hopefully I wont be dropping bombs on you every 3 or 5 weeks like this again. I am going to be back down to 5 days a week again starting next week. YAY!!! Later folks. Johnny D

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lundi, juin 30, 2008 

Humeur actuelle :  barbant
Here are a few "tips" for you to take with you every time you leave the house to go out and play at a bar, eatery, club, etc...
I wrote some of this, added to a pre-existing bulletin from Father Vincent, and had Frank Wood's views and comments on here as well.
If you are in the business as well, and have something to add, drop a comment on here or send it to me in an e-mail and I will add to this as well.
You too may also copy and re-post this but give credit where it is due, just like tipping.
Thanks for reading,
Johnny Psu

Hey guys,

There are many good points made here and since I am in the business, as are many of my friends on here, I decided this was a good forum to spread the word.

Feel free to copy and re-post this for the small percentage of free-loading "friends" you may have lol
I will add some comments on here to go along with the dollar a drink tip rule and such...

A bartender always appreciates this rule.

Along with that, we always remember the good tippers, they get a couple more "buy backs" from us than others do, we tell each other who you are so we all give you better service, and first service over others when busy.Guess what though, we remember the "NON-TIPPING DOUCHE-BAG" over all others. We tell each other who you are too, you get less than quality service, poor attitude, and if you do it enough to me... oops, did I spill that round of drinks over after you paid for them??? Im sorry but, you've been screwing me all night, I figured I would return the favor.
Now get out of my bar!!! (*yes I have done this)
So, spread the word and enjoy yourselves.

Johnny Psu


This is a repost from FATHER VINCENT.

THANK YOU PADRE.




*Frank Wood and Johnny Psu changed a few things, and added some comments others made, to make it appropriate for all different groups of party goers.




READ IT !

COMPREHEND IT !

DO IT !

Take care,

WOOD



To all you Party goers, Bar flies and part time Alcoholics...

I have heard from one too many bartenders, complaining about people not "TIPPING"... and rightfully so!

With the shortage of spaces for parties to happen, the last thing we need is an unhappy Bartender talking ill about us. It is high time we change the stigma of being "those Cheap Kids" or "all they drink is water".


Now I know this doesn't apply to everyone but, everyone out there needs to make an effort.

If you see someone not Tipping.... Say something to them.


Don't turn a blind eye!

If you don't have enough money to leave a tip... don't even buy a drink...better yet, don't even come out... stay home. Save some money and come back next time.


It is good rule of thumb to tip at least ONE dollar per drink...
If you are about to order a drink that is, lets say $7, and thats all you have.. why not get a $6 drink so you can leave that $1 tip?.?.


There are many Benefits to leaving that tip.

You might not realize this but, the Bartender will notice and maybe the next drink you order will be stronger,
The bartender will respond to you quicker.. they will be friendlier... they might even buy you a drink back.


Like I said, many of you know this, but to those who don't, please learn.




If you didn't know, Bartenders don't get a hourly wage. Most get a minimal shift pay of $30, or less, and some, not even that.


*You must also remember, not every shift they work is busy and sometimes walk with barely more than that shift pay so, the 1 or 2 busy nights a week they may have is what they have to live on.


So they rely on Tips!

The goodwill alone is worth it.




Too many bar patrons out there have "fishhooks in their pockets" when it comes to tipping.




And don't get me started on tipping the band.

Most venues around the NYC dont pay bands and if they do, its rarely enough to make enough for each member to buy a slice of pizza and a beer.

How people can sit there and be entertained and walk right by the tip bucket for the band on their way out floors me.


If there is no cover, the band gets paid by the bucket.


Isn't each band member worth at least $1.00? C'mon! You'd have to pay more if there was a door charge.


Rule of thumb.. if you see a band's tip bucket, drop something in and let them know they were appreciated and entertained you.



It is only fair that these good men and women, that provide us with the means to have a good time and help you forget about your own problems for a while, should be given their well earned appreciation..

I will not stop reminding you people about this at any event I am attending, working, or hosting.



I WILL BE WATCHING YOU.


So don't be surprised, if you find me standing next to you, reminding you to leave a tip.


Whenever I have a Mic in my hand, again reminding you all to tip... I will not stop until I hear the bartenders telling me otherwise!

It's time to Change things people.


Step up to the plate.


This wont be the last you hear from me .
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mardi, mai 20, 2008 

Humeur actuelle :  malade
I originally  posted this on February 24, 2006
I figure with the elections fast approaching, this might move some of you to think twice about deciding NOT to vote.
One way or another have a voice and CHOOSE SOMETHING!!!

A public service message from Johnny Psu

Well kids, we are now one step closer... being back to having no rights for women and god knows how many rights we will lose for ourselves (all of us).
Its amazing how the religon of some people will take control over the rights of all people.
Why is it that Church is still involved in matters of state?
I am truly sickened by this decision because it means to be a stepping stone for all other states that may want this, to now jump on the band wagon.
And to think of all the fighting and struggle people did back in the day to acheive rights for women.
The only legal abortion in this state (South Dakota) now, is if the mother's life is in danger. Not from a rape, not by choice, not for anything...
Not even their *Female Senator*, if she gets pregnant and her life is in danger only.

I am truly, truly sadened and getting more and more embarrassed by our government each day.
These are old, dying politicians as well as some young brain washed idiots, trying to make a splash right away, before they either die, or are too old to function normally.
This "law" helps no one!!!
It is just something that they will now be on television for doing.
Just think, interviews and looking even more stupid...   "It is a crime against god..."
Who's god???  Not mine!!! You dont represent me!!!

And to all of you that voted for these idiots, maybe you should have looked into their position on the subject before hand.
And to all you people that didnt vote, out in the great state of So-Dak, now you see what happens when you put all the power in the hands of others and dont give yourself a voice.
All you can do now is complain about the "choices" of others.
Johnny Psu
And now the "official story" below.

South Dakota Senate passes abortion ban
Bill designed to prompt Roe v. Wade challenge moves toward enactment


PIERRE, S.D. - Legislation meant to prompt a national legal battle targeting Roe v. Wade, the 1973 Supreme Court decision legalizing abortion, was approved Wednesday by the South Dakota Senate, moving the bill a step closer to final passage.

The measure, which would ban nearly all abortions in the state, now returns to the House, which passed a different version earlier. The House must decide whether to accept changes made by the Senate, which passed its version 23-12.

"It is the time for the South Dakota Legislature to deal with this issue and protect the lives and rights of unborn children," said Democratic Sen. Julie Bartling, the bill's main sponsor.

The bill, carrying a penalty of up to five years in prison, would make it a felony for doctors or others to perform abortions.

Bartling and other supporters noted that the recent appointment of Justices John Roberts and Samuel Alito make the Supreme Court more likely to consider overturning Roe v. Wade.

President Bush, a Republican and an abortion foe, might also have a chance to appoint a third justice in the next few years, they said.

Opponents argued that the measure was too extreme because it would allow abortions only to save the lives of pregnant women. They said abortion should at least be allowed in cases involving rape, incest and a threat to a woman's health.

Planned Parenthood, which operates the only clinic that provides abortions in South Dakota, pledged to challenge the measure in court if it wins final approval from the Legislature and is signed by Gov. Mike Rounds.

Rounds, a Republican and a longtime abortion opponent, has said he would "look favorably" on the abortion ban if it would "save life."

Other state legislatures are considering similar measures. But South Dakota is the only state so far to pass such an abortion ban, according to the Guttmacher Institute, a reproductive rights organization in New York and Washington, D.C.

7:45  
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