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KevinTheCoolGuy



Last Updated: 11/15/2008

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 90
Sign: Aries

City: CHATTANOOGA
State: Tennessee
Country: US
Signup Date: 1/24/2006

Blog Archive
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Thursday, November 27, 2008 

Quiet on the Set!

So today Crash and I spent the day shooting an infomercial for my standup comedy special The Kevin Show LIVE dvd. It was released last Tuesday November 18th... along with Tropical Thunder, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, and Wall-E.

Needless to say DVD buyers were a bit distracted from my DVD release because of the media blitz from the big 3 released on the same day. I thought that I owed it to my DVD (and to my doctors to whom I still owe thousands of dollars) to try to create my own media blitz.

I kept asking myself what Stephen Speilberg would do, but I didn't start making progress until I started considering what Billy Mays would do.

He would make an infomercial. Billy Mays would for sure make a screaming, yelling, all kinds of exciting infomercial.

So therefore I would make an infomercial. If Billy Mays could sell a gagillion bedazzlers to a world 10 years past thinking... well bedazzling anything was cool, then I could sell a dvd of my LIVE comedy show to help pay on my medical bills.... Right?

I mean, that makes sense, right? I mean, I have a beard, I can be excited with the best of them, and my dvd is definitely versatile.

Don't believe it? Well, check it out for yourself:


For more info on The Kevin Show DVD and FAQ go to www.KevinTheCoolGuy.com/TheKevinShowDVD or click HERE!

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Saturday, November 08, 2008 
Operation Buy My Appendix Back.

HEY MYSPACERS!!!!

I posted this on my website (www.KevinTheCoolGuy.com) and on Facebook but for some reason I forgot to post this on here... but I am correcting that now...

A couple of months ago I had appendicitis and had to have an appen..omy. I don't have insurance so I didn't really want to have the surgery but they said I had to. I tried to get them to cut the frills and extras like anesthesia (I promised I would lie really still and not move) and hospital gowns (I had a perfectly good pair of soccer shorts and a t-shirt that I felt way more comfortable in anyway) and they did cut some (I was offered absolutely NO pudding or ice cream) but even still, I ended up with a pretty significant medical bill.

So my pastor, feeling sorry for me because my job didn't include insurance (or pay me enough to afford my own) came up with a way for me to make a little money to help pay that bill. He said, "We can have 'The Kevin Show' and people can buy tickets and you can use that money to pay your bills."

"What is 'The Kevin Show'?" I asked, confused.

"I don't know, that's up to you, just stand up there and be funny…"

"I…uhh…I…uhh…" I remember saying in response.

So now, this Sunday night, I am gonna try to get up there and be funny. Or slightly funny. Or not funny at all. It could be really great or it could be a disaster… either way I'd love it if you guys could be there. I don't feel comfortable asking for money, so I won't. Give me money, don't give me money, I don't care either way, I'd just love to have you to be there to cheer me on if it turns out good,  or to be there to make fun of me if it turns out to be a disaster. If I'm gonna get booed off stage I want you guys there to do it.

So I just reread that and that's the weirdest invitation ever…

"Please come boo me off stage…"

Well it's obvious I am a horrible promotional manager, let's hope I'm a better comedian…

Details

When: Sunday November 9th –6pm

Where: Ridgedale Baptist Church (view map here)

Location: CLC (Christian Life Center… "The Gym")

More Info: 499.0994 (Church Office)

My buddy Shannon Madden was cool enough to take a little time and make up a poster for me….
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Yup, that's me on The Operation board game. Kinda ridiculous, huh?

But kinda fitting, too, huh? I mean, I AM the most ridiculous person you know.

Hope to see you at the show!

If you want more information or want me to mention your name on stage, call my cell at 423.243.6536.
Sunday, September 21, 2008 

Today I went down to Birmingham, Alabama to compete in a Krystal eating contest with the one-and-only Takeru Kobayashi. True Story.

Turns out he is a fan of mine... Who knew???

He said he has been a fan of mine ever since I was an exchange student to Japan in high school. It must have been the bright yellow and green lemon-lime sprite shorts I made in Japanese Home-Ec.

Ehh, maybe not. Anyway, go to KevinTheCoolGuy.com and check out the Photo of the Day.

Yeah, that's Kobayashi. THE Kobayashi. Getting MY autograph. Crazy.
Friday, September 12, 2008 

Please show these VIDEOS to Granny... it is your duty as her second favorite grandchild...

Just wanted you guys to know that I am an idiot. And I know that I have said that for years, and that my mom has said that for years, and that YOU have said that for years, but until now it just seems that there has been no direct video proof of this. Well.... now there is.

I have put Mary in charge of taking my Granny to the site but she can help you as well. Sign up via a comment below and she will help guide you to KevinTheCoolGuy.com and check these out for yourself.

If for some reason we have dated in the past and you broke up with me but are now starting to think you made a mistake... go watch these VIDEOS and it will help re-enforce you made the right decision.

Anyway, I'm an idiot, hope you enjoy!

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Wednesday, September 10, 2008 
Hello Fellow MySpacers!

Check out my newest blog Good KleeN Fun at KevinTheCoolGuy.com.

Feel free to subscribe to all the happenings including the Photo of the Day on KevinTheCoolGuy.com by clicking on the link below.

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Monday, September 08, 2008 
Hey guys! Hope all is going well, just wanted to point you to this week's _____ of the Week (pronounced "Blank of the Week") on the patCAST website. Click on the link below to be taken directly to the blog:

Mathematician of the Week


Feel free to subscribe to all the happenings on KevinTheCoolGuy.com by clicking on the link below.

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Okay, see ya!!!
Sunday, August 31, 2008 
Hey Guys! Hope all of you are doing well! I just wanted to point you to a couple of blogs I have written lately.

Michael Phelps: In 4 Months  is a blog on my website along with a couple of others you might not have read yet. I'd love it if you'd check them out and let me know what you think. Feel free to subscribe! KevinTheCoolGuy.com



Also, you can check out  _____ of the Week (that's pronounced "Blank of the Week") on the patCAST website. This week's "Blank" of the Week is Politician of the Week. Check it out, hopefully it'll make you laugh. Feel free to subcribe! pat-cast.com

Okay, have a great day! See ya!

Kevin K Lewis
Friday, July 25, 2008 
*Help me plan my Imagication 2008!

I have been ridiculous busy all summer and while I may not get a "real" vacation, that doesn't mean I can't take an imaginary one!

Log on toKevinTheCoolGuy.com and put in your suggestions as to where I should go and then check back every day to read my blog about my glorious Imagication 2008! (possibly to the destination of your suggestion!)


Can't wait to see where you send me!
Sunday, July 20, 2008 
Dear Mary Pike,

I finally blogged again. You can read it at KevinTheCoolGuy.com. I am sorry it took so long. Please forgive me. And PLEEEEASE don't show that Miley Cyrus picture of me to granny.

Love your favorite cousin in the WHOLE world,

Kevin K Lewis

PS. There are lots of pictures because I know that you don't read so good ;-)



Dear Everyone Else,

Please don't let Mary show my granny that Miley Cyrus picture of me from the patCAST. It was obviously doctored and is in NO WAY me. Also, you too should go check out my latest blog at KevinTheCoolGuy.com. See ya!

Kevin K Lewis

Sunday, June 08, 2008 
So I'm preaching tomorrow morning at East Ridge Retirement Center.

Confused? Let me explain...We have a ministry at East Ridge Retirement Center. We go there every week and have a service for residents there who cannot make it to church with us at Ridgedale. As you might expect they are in their 70's, 80's and 90's. The man who heads up this ministry and is usually there on Sunday mornings is going to be out of town this week. He needed someone to replace him so since I work with the youth, he asked me. You might think that is crazy, but my first thought was, "Finally, a group who will really understand my Murder, She Wrote illustrations!"


As we talked over what the service would be, I asked if I could talk about whatever I wanted or was there a certain book of the Bible or study they were going through. He said they were doing a study on Wisdom in Everyday Life. From Proverbs. This week is chapter 6.

So I am gonna talk to old people about wisdom. I ate homemade ice cream and Doritos for dinner tonight, I'm not sure I'm qualified to talk to anyone about wisdom. What makes it better is that the title of this week's study is "Three Rules For Working Smart." Huh? "Working Smart"???

The people I am talking to are retired. You know how I know that... It says it right there in the name: East Ridge Retirement Center. Hmm, we'll see how that goes.

To increase my chances of being successful I bought a new blazer today. I actually bought two. I tried on more blazers today in twenty minutes than I have in my whole life... and narry a one was new. The two I bought were a total of $7.47. They are pretty snazzy.

I figured I would seem wiser if I were wearing a blazer. It works for college professors so why not nursing home preachers. Pretty smart, huh? Wisdom, I'm full of it.

I'm also leading the music, which should be interesting. They said, "Have you ever led music?" and I said, "No." They said, "Well, I'm sure you'll do great."

Fantastic!

I spoke with Mrs. Carolyn who plays the piano and we are gonna sing several old hymns and end with Amazing Grace because if we don't sing it they get upset. I was thinking that since they like it so much we might forego the hymns and just sing it 4 times, you know, just to give me a head start going into the sermon. On wisdom. In the workplace. For people who live at the retirement center.

I can't wait to let you know how it went. Especially the "bedhead" illustration. It
will probably go a little bit like this:


Me: "blah, blah, blah, bedhead, blah, blah..."

Bertha: "What? Bed what? What? Bread when? Huh?"

Me: "No, "bedhead". Bed... Head."

Bertha: "Bed...Head?? What is that?"

Me: "It's, you know, your hair when you first get out of bed in the morning... before you fix it. It's sticking up in some places, and it's flat in some places and... well, like Mrs. Ruth's there for instance... Or Elmer... Or that whole row right there..."


Yeah, I might just stick with the JB Fletcher references.