Mingalaba!

I’ve been asked why I’ve decided to take a stand for the people of Burma. I pondered this question for a moment then I explained exactly why.

A little over 150 years ago my people along with the rest of the Indigenous population of the United States of America were under siege. With the pseudo religious axiom of Manifest Destiny the US Government declared war on us allowing for the wholesale murder of our sovereign nations. From the land of the Lenapi, Lakota, Cheyenne, Apache and a multitude of other noble tribes we were hunted down like animals.

We were hunted down, tortured raped and murdered in the secret holocaust that killed millions of my brothers and sister in this hellish bloodbath. Children were raped and cut to ribbons while pregnant women had babies carved out of their bellies while U.S. Soldiers laughed and joked. Civilians were offered rewards for our scalps while soldiers paraded through their towns with human body parts ornamenting their ponies and uniforms. And the media pumped the papers full of lies to fostered support for the genocide of those “pesky savages”.

Lusting for the funny yellow medal that makes the white man crazy, soldiers under the stewardship of General George Armstrong Custer they invaded tribal land that was promised by treaties. The Black Hills became a killing field as well as the rest of Indian Country. Screams of agony echoed throughout the land while anyone who could carry a rifle shot innocent men women and children in their slept, as they ate or hunted. Even on territory promised to tribes in the waning years of the holocaust such as Oklahoma the land was opened up to settlers in the most criminal acts of land theft in U.S. history. People were murdered in clod blood by settlers who brought wagons and built farms and communities with no regard for treaties.

Rivers ran with the blood of my people as the land grab continued. Manifest Destiny was their divine right to take what they wanted even though the land was promised to us. Eventually many of our nations ceased to exist and their histories ripped from history books. They could not take away our oral tradition and we remember what they have done to us and the myriad of tribes that disappeared from the face of this Earth. All that remained of these tribes were names in a subdivision street or ally. The countryside was filled with mass graves where the Cavalry buried our slaughtered people, out of sight and out of mine. Many events were never recorded or the facts skewed to justify our demise.

The once bountiful buffalo was all but exterminated in part to destroy our food supply and to introduce their tasteless fat laden cow from English cattle barons. Herds used to span as far as the eye could see. Eye witness accounts told of trains stopped for over a day as herds many miles wild and untold miles long would cross the railroad track.  Photos of these so called great buffalo hunters sitting on gigantic piles of carcasses adorn museums to this day. Speaking about the railroad, people would ride the train and take pot shots for sport at Indians who were simply watching the locomotive roll through they land. People would wager who would shoot the most “savages” on a trip killing fathers, mothers and children in their wake.  

To add insult to injury we were victims of biological warfare with cholera infested blankets that were distributed to our people on the paltry reservations they finally gave us. The locations were wind driven with no game or a means to survive the cold bitter months. Rancid and putrefied food was distributed to us while greedy brokers kept the good. And the whole world looked on with ambivalence and distain as the media masters pumped out lies after lies with their tabloids raising even more negative press against us. Only after the advent of the 20th Century did the U.S. Government stop a program of rewarding people with $900 for Indian skulls robbed from our graves Government anthropologists were feverishly trying to prove we were sub human. This is only a tiny glimpse of the stories that abound with much more gruesome tales of genocide, betrayal and survival against all odds. All that remains is a fraction of the Indigenous populations who once lived on this land. The few buffalo that survived are relegated to ranches never to roam the plains again.

My uncle once told me that we are related to the coyote since no matter how hard the white man tried to kill us off we still returned. The shooting has stopped for the most part. We are relegated to reservations and in many cases still struggle to survive. But we are still here, witnesses to mans greed and the wholesale slaughter of innocent men women and children. It was one of the greatest acts of genocide in world history. From the tip of Alaska to the tip of South America untold millions of Natives were slaughtered in cold blood by Europeans hunting for gold, land and a multitude of natural resources. In the south the genocide continues throughout Central and South America for gold, oil and other natural resources. So I guess I should feel fortunate living in relative safety, but I’m not so inclined.

When I first met a Karen villager I was curious about their culture so I queried through my interpreter Madam Butterfly. I was taken back by what I heard because it was a carbon copy of what happened to our people in the Americas. The ghoulish and barbaric details brought tears to my eyes because I saw my own relations in these soft spoken tribal people. I was introduced to the political exiles that spent their young years in Insein prison. They were tortured and beaten to till they did not move on a daily basis for the crime of wanting freedom and democracy. An elder told me an ancient story about 7 fabled brothers within their Asian tradition. Then I was told that I and all the Natives of the Americas were descendants of the eldest brother, (Shaun htoi Gam). It was a very intriguing yet humbling story.

As I looked into the eyes of their children I could see my cousins, nieces and my beloved sister who I used to call the Chinaman because of her pronounced Asian features. That’s when I decided to take up this cause and make the world aware of the atrocities that befell these innocent and kind people. The eldest brother has come back home to help his people.

A lot of water has passed under the bridge of life and I’ve traveled many miles since that fateful day. With a wealth of resources including intelligence and advanced technology at my disposal I’ve taken up the cause with a vengeance. Whether they are Kachin, Mon, Karen, Wa, Rvwang or the multitude of tribes who face extinction they are my people. I will utilize my resources in both Asia and the free world to accomplish the common goal, freedom from bondage. I have many aces up my sleeve and some spooky little friends who are already in the trenches fighting for Burma’s democracy. One day I will be drinking tea at a quaint little café with my brother Myo Thein in Rangoon City. Daw Aung San Suu Kyi will be dedicating a new hospital down the street. I can smell the nga pi wafting in the air now.

Kyay Zu Tin Pa Te

Your Devil’s Advocate

Buffalohair

As we enter the next phase of Earth Changes you would think mankind would be bracing for the much more virulent events that are just around the corner. Some nations are already reeling from these effects while others live with a feeling of immunity. Just remember what them old buzzards from all corners of the globe have said, no place on Earth will be spared from the cleansing. Also it should be pointed out that the only real way to prepare is within your heart.

The secret to survival is not storing up truck loads of goods, guns and goodies; it’s knowing when to leave, more on that later. Stuff might be nice to have but if you had to leave in a hurry from some cataclysmic event you would not have the time. You still would only end up with the cloths on your back and that silly Winnie the Poo Backpack filled with candy, crayolas and a couple of Hanna Montana CD’s. You should have taken the survival backpack angle more seriously eh. Remember, “What you can grab is what you will have”. A packed backpack filled with survival essentials is a wise investment. Chances are whence you returned to your home after disaster struck the landscape would have changed drastically and your stash would be history. That is if you even survive in the first place. Come on, the reality is many people will not make the cut so I guess it would be the end of the world for them eh. My people say it’s the end of the way of mankind, not the end of mankind. And this axiom is shared by all dogmas of the world.

Don’t get me wrong, I have my field pack, FNFAL Assault Rifle, .45 jelly bean shooter, canteen and foul weather gear at the ready. Call it a basic LRRP pack, (Long Range Reconnaissance Patrol). I already know there is no way I would be able to hump my stores of ammunition, other pop guns, cloths and food stuff. No, I don’t have a global positioner. I prefer my battery free compass. You must realize there will be a time when modern technology will cease to function for a myriad of reasons, polar shifts and activity in the magnetosphere, just to mention a few. In the visions it was said electricity would become non existent at some point. When, I just can’t tell you but I know we will be on manual mode for quite some time after the changes are complete. I know this would devastate the IPod generation for sure, the electricity part that is. I don’t think I would be missed by politicians and world dictators if I did not make the cut. But I’ll wager they would be trying to remember my simple words of survival provided they were not whacked by nature’s law of retribution. You remember, “What comes around goes around”. We will reap what we sow, that is a given.

As a journalist my world would be turned upside down since I would not have spell check and be forced to resort to using primitive devices called a pen and paper, oh the horror. The studio and every electronic gizmo would be just a novelty including all my High Def equipment if my home is not obliterated. Wish I kept my old manual .35 motion picture camera and film bag though. My electricity bound Detroit chariot would be nothing more than a yard ornament with worthless plastic gadgets and expired plates. So everything, even my means of egress would require manual labor. On the bright side I would not have to worry about paying my monthly extortion payment to the insurance companies. And I would finally have some rest from all the telemarketers who’ve encroached on my cell phones, complements of George W. Bush I might add. Gads, no more Erectile Dysfunction ads. It was rude to have commercials about buying foreclosed homes anyway so I won’t miss them either. Never in my dying day would I ever have imagined a president promoting borrowing more money when debt was the root cause of the economical disaster. Such is life but those days would be over including the colonization of the planet. (Globalization)

So here I would sit along a babbling brook, what a picturesque setting if it were not for one thing. That’s where my bitchen house and studio was. At least I would have running water and since it’s coming off the mountain top it would not have too many bodies floating around in it. That’s another thing, you’ll have to get used to the putrid sweet smell of rotting human flesh since people are going to die, especially in urban areas. If you’re lucky enough to be around running water make sure to walk up stream and remove any decomposing neighbors and animals you may find. As distasteful as it may sound burying or burning the dead should be a priority to avoid diseases, at least where you decide to establish a Bivouac (camp). Be my luck I’m at a camp fire and Bear the Wonder Dog walks up with a hand or a foot in his mouth, holay. I hate that.

With a fire burning into the night the mind would wander as isolation, confusion and fear sets in. It’s bad enough many survivors will most likely whack themselves because of the magnitude of what has transpired. So don’t be one of them. On the other hand think about what you do know about survival and hopefully you are not one of those who are solely dependant of modern living. We will be thrust into the Stone Age in many regions if only temporary, 3-7 years I guestimate from stories and visions. In any event one must be prepared to survive on their own. From lessons learned from contemporary society, you can’t depend on anyone but yourself. Tribal people would adjust much easier since everyone is part of the whole, even my Listerine drinking cousin. The joke around my people is that someone would have to tell us the world has changed since we live in the Stone Age already, sorry, Injun humor. There is no doubt I would make tracks to my reservation and hook back up with my people. It would take a month or so but I would get there. Hopefully they would still be around. But knowing my people they would be having a social and I would hear our drum well in advance of my arrival. Who needs HBO when we can gourd dance?

If for some reason it was no longer possible to traverse the altered landscape then it would be time to make a more permanent base camp. Living in a multi tribal region survival would not be so bad since everyone would have a skill or craft of some kind. From making clothing, shoes and Tee Pee’s as well as hunting, trapping and brain tanning skills we already have a game plan of sorts. The barter system would be something else that would come into play and that’s way cool as far as I’m concerned. With engineering, hunting, smoking, farming/ranching and building skills I have plenty to offer to a group of people I stumble upon. Doubt they would want to utilize my opinionated journalistic prowess though. When I say smoking I don’t mean twisting some dubage, I mean smoking and curing meat. Course I’ll wager the marijuana laws would not be as restrictive. Munchies would not be very welcomed when food was at a premium. Weed would be relegated to the medicine it once was. Wonder if my medical marijuana card would still be valid?

Natives don’t corner the market in survival I might add. I’ve met many non Natives whose cultural traditions were chock full of survival skills. People who live in fridge regions of the globe would be a wealth of information on surviving extreme climates and believe me, the weather will be extreme. The end of Earth’s temperate period will come with a vengeance in many regions so don’t pack to much Sea and Ski in your overnight bag. People who live close to the Earth like farmers, ranchers, hunters and the like will adjust quite easily. Granted life will be more like an extended vacation in the wilderness. Survivors in rural communities would regroup with a sense of oneness, rebuild and establish some kind of order. After all electricity is actually a recent commodity and if the power went kaput for an extended period of time steam will eventually be back in vogue. Oil companies were responsible for quashing steam technology back in the day if anyone remembers history. So eventually the white puff of steam would grace the skyline of the world I venture to state.

Spirituality would be on the rise since it would be this axiom that saved those who truly understood the teachings of their respective dogmas. Now here is where I tell you how you are going to survive major disasters and most likely piss some of you off. Within ancient teachings, before man meddled with sacred works, it was once known that messengers were sent to all cultures of the universe. These messengers taught the fundamentals of good and bad, right and wrong and most important of all, respect to others regardless of color, creed and gender. Man, on the other hand, used dogmas or religions to control the masses for the purpose of loyalty and fighting under one flag.

Since the time Ramses II and the introduction of the monotheistic religion dogmas spiraled out of control. Constantine took religion to another level and mankind started this bogus axiom of “Holy Wars” and disregarded the core tenets of their faiths then killed in the name of their respective G*D. Charlemagne and the Knights Templar murdered they way into history killing in the name of G*D. How far beyond stupid is that eh? Does “Though Shalt Not Kill” ring a bell? Any one, any one?… But like the Constitution of the United States, some parts of their sacred works were simply ignored since it caused a conflict in the quest for material gain. Sounds familiar eh. And like a bad dream history continues to repeat itself. Personally, I’m glad it’s all coming to an end and it does not matter of I make the cut or not since I know where I am going. But that’s another story.

So what the heck does this have to do with survival? Well if you read your sacred books or paid attention to your elders you would know that spirits are here with us now not just in stories. All religions teach people how to cope with both good and bad spirits, plain and simple. This is the most important key to survival in the coming days. Remember the story about Moses and how he freed his people from bondage in ancient Egypt? Anyway if you read this piece “Shemot  (Exodus) 12:21” you would know that Moses was warned of impending danger and arrival of the angel of death in a paranormal way. Lamb’s blood was placed above the doors of those who listened to Moses and the lives of their first born were spared. Bummer about Pharos kid though. Knowing the spirits who comes to warn you is the key to surviving in the future. Though many people purport to know their faith they run from anything paranormal and relegate this to horror flicks and science fiction. This is a fatal mistake since the spirit world has always been alive and well; we only drifted away from this ideology. Just so you know, the spirit world is supposed to interface with our plain of existence in the days to come and I’ll wager Prozac and Lithium will be in demand as people think they are going nuts. Imagine how frustrated a good spirit will be when they can’t get the attention of someone they want to save. Oh well, to bad, so sad.

We’ve blinded ourselves from the spirit world and the messengers who will warn us of impending doom. Within all dogmas they provide you with a simple answer to survival so pay attention and possible you will make the cut. When a spirit comes to you and tells you that you must leave, don’t take it for granted. Simply pray within your respective dogma to verify if this spirit is either good or bad. You will get an immediate answer. If the answer is no, the bad spirit will simply disappear, If the spirit is good then grab your backpack and get the heck out of Dodge, like pronto. Just make sure you don’t grab the Winnie the Poo backpack eh.

Sadly many people will simply freak out and turn into a mush of quivering flesh at the sight of anything “Other Worldly”, paleeze. Many cultures have an on going relationship with spirits and it’s a day to day thing. Personally, I could give a flying crappola about many of them since they only want me to do dumb things or misguide me. Others like to try and torment me but I don’t torment easily. I have no fear since they are simply a part of who we are. Just remember, bad spirits are fueled by fear but they can’t do a dang thing if you don’t let them. My people burn cedar to clear the room of evil, we also pray for assistance to drive the point home. Just remember to verify if a spirit is good or bad and if they are good heed their warning like Moses did and you stand a good chance of surviving the time of change.

If the change does not occur I hope you like the taste of Victory Gin and the sound of Double Speak. The only other option is colonization and the New World Order and that’s not an option at all.

Your Devil’s Advocate

Buffalohair

NASA plans an assault on the citizens of *Cabeus A Crater for rejecting plans to colonize the Solar System.

An unnamed NASA official was quoted as saying;

“We’ve pretty much got the New Word Order sewn up. People of Earth have given up their sovereignties, civil liberties and were assigned to economic work zones now. The Moon is chock full of natural resources and water is one of them. The Moon’s strategic location and the possibility Cabeus A may be building weapons of mass destruction also contributed to the World Trade Organization and the United Nations decision to attack.”

“You guys can colonize the Earth all you want but keep the Moon out of it eh” said Cabeus A resident Lester McGraw.

Mr. McGraw and his family migrated to Cabeus A along with other deposed and impoverished Earthlings who’ve lost their homes and way of life. Attracted by the lack of criminally corrupt politicians in bed with international corporations and greed, the Moon was the only sensible option left. The balmy 107c temperature in the day time and the subtle –153c evening temperature also played into their decision to move to the Moon.

“We don’t get much company here except for a few space guys and they did not hurt anything. Just did not care much for that dang anal probe. But all in all, the Moon was a quiet and secure place where we could raise our kids. And no more Ottawa traffic to contend with. Since Zellers just opened up a new superstore in the next crater we had everything we needed, well except Canadian beer, but we’re building a new brewery. Tim Horton’s was going to open a cafe here until the United Nations Security Council decided we were building nuclear bombs. And that’s when life changed for us eh”, said former Saint Johns resident, Dennis Newman.

“We even have our own national anthem” quipped another former resident of Saint Johns as he began to sing, ‘The Man on the Moon is Newfi’, by **Stompin Tom Connor.

Life on the moon was bliss according to local residence of Cabeus A. They boasted of free satellite TV from all the space junk NASA and other space related organizations dumped on this once desolate stellar object. Living in extreme cold was not a major concern for these rugged Canadian pioneers but they missed the snow.

“I’ll bet they think our brewery is some kind of nuclear reactor and if they bomb that, then they will really have a war on their hands eh, blasted Earthies”, retorted Mr. Newman.

Will October 9th, the date of the pending assault, mark the end of a way of life for these innocent victims of greed and expansion? And most important of all, will NASA bomb their brewery? Only time will tell.

Your Devil’s Advocate

Buffalohair

* http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/badastronomy/2009/09/14/lcross-impact-site-picked/

** http://www.stompintomtribute.com/