Curiousness
What's your current mood?	sleepy
How was your day?	unremarkable
What's your goal	to be a good mommy
What song are you listening to?	nothing right now
Favorite Snack(s)	fresh bread and good cheese
Name a movie you like	The 10th Kingdom
Favorite scent	sandalwood, ginger, rainstorms, the ocean
Do you have a religion?	nope
One thing that bugs you about people	stupidity, apathy, selfishness and spite
Your favorite thing from Starbucks	as long as it's cold and someone else is paying for it I don't care.
Do you believe in horoscopes	Are you asking if I beieve in their existence or their accuracy?I believe that someone could learn about themselves from the alignment of the universe at any given time, but I don't believe in the people that spit out 30-word summaries in the weekly newspaper.
Favorite drink	jack and coke
What do you do to relieve stress	right now? cry. hopefully that will stop soon
Do you have a job?	full-time incubator!
best physical trait in opposite sex	shoulders, collarbone and chest
Hair dyed?	nope
Your best physical trait	my eyes?
What interests you?	family, cats, water, numbers, nature, books, animals, the list can go on and on
Do you believe in Love?	yes
Do you believe in best friends?	yes
Take this survey or other MySpace Surveys at PimpSurveys.com

I found this, and added some:
How many girlfriends or boyfriends have told you they love you?:	most of them said it, but i think only one or two meant it
Have you ever thought that you were going to marry a person?:	at one point I did
Are you crushin' on anybody?:	yeah :)
Have you ever loved someone so much that it hurt?:	yes
Have you ever made a boyfriend or girlfriend cry?:	unfortunately
Are you happier single or in a relationship?:	if it's a healthy, happy relationship, then together, but I would rather be alone than just stick myself to someone because they happen to be there.
Have you ever been cheated on?:	yes
What is your favorite thing(s) about the opposite sex?:	power and dominance mingling with care and gentleness
Have you ever had your heart broken?:	yes
Have you ever broken someones heart?:	unfortunately
Talk to any of your ex's?:	not many anymore
If you could go back in time and change things with your ex's, would you?:	maybe the circumstances of certain aspects of the relationships, but I wouldn't want to have prolongled any of the relationships. They were wrong.
Do you believe that you are a good boyfriend or girlfriend?:	I hope so.
Have you been in an abusive relationship?:	yes
Have you dated someone older than you?:	yes
Younger?:	no
Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?:	it depends on what they did wrong and to whom
Believe in love at first sight?:	I believe in lust and infatuation at first sight. You have to have respect, trust, and care to love someone, and those things take time.
Ever been given an engagement ring?:	yes
Do you want to get married?:	If it were for the right reasons, yes.
Do you have something to say to any of your ex's?:	not really
Ever stolen someones boyfriend or girlfriend?:	no
Ever liked someone else's boyfriend or girlfriend?:	yes
Does heartbreak really feel as bad as it sounds?:	and then some
Do you want to be like any of your friends?:	i wish i were more better at controlling emotions than I am, and that things didn't affect me so strongly
Bootycall with any of your ex's?:	no
Do you want to get back with your ex on the DL?:	LOL, no.
Take this survey or other MySpace Surveys at PimpSurveys.com

So I wake up, hop in the car, get to the front gate and realize I don't have enough gas to get to my prenatal appointment.  I feel like I've been run over by a truck, my head won't stop throbbing, and it feels like my feet are losing circulation.

it's hot and dreary with the thunderstorms today, and my phone is terribly finicky in this weather.  My computer is still connected to the internet by what i can only consider an act of divine intervention from whatever gods up there are keeping an eye on me (THANK YOU BTW!).

And I'm done bitching now.  Thanks for reading, and for caring how bad my day has gone, you deserve a treat.  here, LOL for a minute:






thanks for your support.  I love you guys.

Ami

http://www.myspace.com/lolkats

Well, I've done a complete 180 from the past few weeks.  I'm feeling beautiful and sexy.  I feel optimistic about where things are headed, and what I will be able to provide for my little girl.

We're spending the next few weeks completely remodeling my house for the baby's arrival.  Making things clean and safe and convenient.  My family is going nuts over things the baby might need, and it makes me so happy that they're involved.  Her father is even changing, growing as a person for himself and her.

As for me, I'm starting to realize that despite what anyone else thinks, I have a sexy baby belly. :)  I wake up every day tired, but energetic (if that makes sense).  I'm feeling more vibrant and healthy than I think I ever have.

The baby is helping me with my little bouts of depression.  When I get upset over the way I feel, or lonely, or even wishing the pregnancy was over already she kicks me as if to say "quit thinking that, you have me".  (Okay, so maybe it's my imagination saying that, but it is reassuring.)

I also have recently reconnected with someone I have been seeking for years.  And the crazy thing is we're still as close as before, if not closer.  I feel like it's been a week since I last saw him instead of years, that's how easy the conversation picked up.  We were at ease again after only two or three minutes.  It's very nice.

Oh, and I have started a kind of 'project', I guess.  I'm going to try to remember, every two weeks, to take a belly photo and stick it in the 'baby' album on here, that way I can keep track of how big I get.  (and I guess so that I can show off my sexy baby belly lol!)  Since I didn't start to show noticeably until about 18 weeks I started there.  Hopefully it will be somewhat entertaining.  At the very least, it will make me happy.

Well, good night all.  I'm going to nap for a few hours, then to Charlotte I go, lol.

Well, around 8 this morning Verizon turned my phone off.  I have to come up with about $220 to get it turned back on so it may be a little bit.  Until then, about the only way to reach me is going to be Yahoo Messenger or Myspace/Myspace Messenger.  For those of you who don't have it, my email address is AdoriLaTerraBella@yahoo.com.  Sorry about the trouble.

"I've never seen a night so long
When time goes crawling by
The moon just went behind a cloud
To hide its face and cry"

-Hank Williams, I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry

Here's a paragraph from the movie/documentary 'What the Bleep Do We Know?' that perfectly summarizes why religion makes no sense to me, and its purpose as a tool.

"Most people think of god as that great figure in the sky with a white beard who's scrutinizing the human race from above.  They see us here on earth as in some form of neutral testing ground where we're placed by god for a period, and god watches from above, registering the scores on his laptop, as to whether we perform according to his designs, or whether we're "offending" him, as it's put.  An absolutely outrageous idea.  How could we offend 'God' - the type of god that people believe in.  How could it matter so much to him?  How could he find it so serious a situation that he could condemn us to an eternity of suffering.
These are bizarre ideas that obviously have a great hold on the fears and the limitations and the insecurities of people, which is why religion can play so effectively - whether deliberately or otherwise - on those insecurities.  People fall into line very readily when they are threatened by these cosmic sentences of everlasting punishment."

For those of you I haven't told in person yet, I'm going to have a baby.  We're not sure what the sex is yet, but we have an ultrasound scheduled in April.  The baby is due Sept 4th, and has been nicknamed 'Ti' until we have decided on a suitable name.  I'm terribly excited, but kind of nervous as well.  I know I'll be a good mother, but what I'm worried about it finances (scary).  But I know we'll work through it somehow.  Wish me luck!

      I can't stand it up here much longer.  These stupid fucking rednecks have had their dicks in their sister's ass for so long that they are completely unable to accept anything outside of their twisted, self-imposed idiocy.  I'm tired of dealing with all of these racist, sexist, closed-minded, homophobic, narcissistic pigs.  Men fear what they don't understand, and destroy what they fear.  To that effect, everyone in this backwater shithole hates everything that's not their ideal 'blond-haired-blue-eyed-heterosexual-god-fearing-redneck-trash'.

 

      On a daily basis the things I hear people say out here makes me wonder whether the last hundred years of equal rights struggles have made it this far into the south.  The worst thing about it is that no matter what I say, or how I try to explain it, people look at me like I'm stupid whenever I stand up for the minorities that everyone hates out here.  For example, Saturday July 5th, I'm out at some redneck gathering in our community.  A black man shows up and one of the guys near me says, "That, there, just about makes me want to head on home," and nods meaningfully in the direction of the black man.  Sure enough, within five minutes of this man showing up, people are getting in their golf carts and heading home, complaining of the 'kind of people' allowed in.  Later on the same night, a man dressed as a woman shows up.  Of course, there's whisperings and gossip and all kinds of 'covert' conversations about her (in my opinion she looked pretty good, taking into account the amount of work actually involved.  You wouldn't be able to tell that she was a transvestite from more than a couple of feet).

 

      The way people behave out here is atrocious.  They cling to their stupid idea of 'christian morals and values'.  Some of the things they say make no sense.  "That just isn't christian!!!", for example.  Where, exactly, in their religious text, did their god say that only  caucasian, heterosexual, christian people are worthy of respect and love?  What 'isn't christian' is the unjust persecution of any person or group of people purely because you don't agree with or approve of what they do.

 

      The frightening thing is that the harder you try to make these people understand these things, the more solid your argument is, and the more holes are poked in their 'well-meaning prejudice' routine, the harder these people fight you to keep their backward fucking logic working.  Eventually they fall on the, 'Well, that's just the way I was raised,' excuse, at which point anything you try to tell them will become greek and - almost - you can watch it float out of their head.  Now, if by some miracle of patience you manage to make it to this point, I recommend giving up.  Once the, "that's just the way I was raised,'  excuse comes up, you are speaking to a human wall.  You will get one of three things:

 

a)  The blank look.  This is what arguing with a brick wall or other inanimate object feels like.

b)  The cold shoulder.  This may be in the form of ignoring you, and sometimes in the form of the person walking away from the conversation, with or without the 'forget it', 'whatever' or 'never mind' hints to signal the end of the conversation.

c)  The fist.  This usually occurs if the person you are speaking to has given a particularly passionate (if not always logical) argument, has been consuming large amounts of alcohol, and/or is currently flying a rebel flag off the radio antenna of their pickup truck.  (All three combined make the fist a very likely response once his/her excuses have been shredded.)

 

Anyway, sorry about the rant.  I never thought I'd say it, but I miss Charlotte.  People are more fucked up out here than they ever were back there.  Please, someone grace me with an intelligent conversation.  I feel like my brain cells are rotting out here.

 

…god I hate stupid people.

Tag Your It!

Here's how you play:

Once you have been tagged, you have to post a blog with 10 weird, random things, facts, habits, or goals about yourself. At the end choose 10 people to be tagged. You can't tag the person that tagged you. Since you can't tag me back, let me know when you've posted your blog so I can see your answers.

1. I absolutely love cows.
2. I can play any song I know on my nose.
3. Unless I am extremely tired, either my fingers or feet are always tapping.
4. I have this innate ability to open my mouth at exactly the wrong time, and say exactly the wrong thing, to exatly the wrong person.
5. I am a D&D addict.
6. I am slightly obsessive about organization of certain things I own, for instance pictures, videos, and text files on my computer, my books and movies.
7. Part of me, deep down wants to be something creative. A writer, or artist.
6. My greatest fear is the possibility that I'm barren.
8. I will eat dill pickles on just about anything.
9. I treat my animals better than I would treat any human.
10. I am proud of my family, but embarassed by myself continuously.

 




Sampson
Sampson is a three-year-old male Malamute-Wolf mix. He is shy but very sweet. Smart and obedient, he is a very good dog. He does not get along with cats.  Sampson is a little territorial with his food, and needs to be in a loving home with no cats or other male dogs.  Females are OK.  He is very good with kids and adults alike.
 










Blue
Blue is a three-year-old male purebred Siberian Husky. He needs a yard to run around in, because he is very energetic.  Blue can not be around cats, or other male dogs, or any small or toy dogs.  He is very sweet with people, housetrained and well behaved on a leash.  He also has all of his shots.
 









Scourge
Scourge is a nine-month-old female husky mix, and Blue's daughter.  She has the exact body style, coloring,  and markings of a coyote.  She is very sweet, however she has not yet been trained to stop jumping. She is an outside dog and needs lots of room to run. Scourge is a very friendly dog, and has shown no aggression towards other dogs. 
 









Duke
Duke is a three-month-old male husky mix, and Blue's son.  He is a very sweet dog, and has feather-soft fur.  He has the body of a husky and the markings of a Rottweiler.  Duke is extremely sweet and playful, and loves attention and food.   We have not had the time to train him, but we hope to get him to a good home soon.









My Email Addy:
X_Lone_Valkyrie_X@yahoo.com

My Phone #:
(704)777-4928

Alex's Phone #:
(704)351-2709