.. .. .. .. .. .. ....

How I know my job is done.....

 ....

 ....

·      How do you know your job is done? How do you know you’ve done a good job?....

·      I’ll tell you how I know.....

·      Cleaning houses is my business. ....

·      Cleaning someone’s home is my way of making a difference for others.....

·      I’m very good at what I do.....

·      But please don’t judge the quality of my work by the condition of my own home. ....

·      It’s really a chain reaction.....

·      I do it for others so that they are freed up to make a difference for the people in their lives. ....

·      How many of you have allowed someone to clean your home for you?....

·      What was that like? ....

·      In that moment, what did you experience?....

·      For most, it’s a release of tension, of letting go of a worry, a moment of freedom. ....

·      For many people, they physically, actually take a deep breath, let out a big sigh; I can almost see a huge weight being lifted from them. ....

·      Having their home cleaned on a regular schedule, people begin to experience a new level of creativity, motivation and inspiration. ....

·      They are freed up to do more for the people in their lives, be it their families, co-workers or the customers they serve.....

·      Some begin to take better care of themselves too, experiencing better health. ....

·      I hear stories of my clients taking part in projects they didn’t have time for before. ....

·      Things like finishing that art project.....

·      Getting the garage organized, finally.....

·      Having people over for dinner.....

·      Having parties.....

·      Fixing the kitchen up just they way they’ve always wanted it. ....

·      Working in their flower gardens.....

·      Enjoying the vegetables they planted before it’s too late.....

·      Painting the spare room.....

·      Participating in their communities more. ....

·      Volunteering at their kid’s schools.....

·      What would you do with more time? ....

·      What would you do with less to worry about? ....

·      What’s that thing you’ve been meaning to get to?....

·      Maybe you could use some help.....

·      When I see my client stop, take that deep breath and smile.....

·      That’s when I know my job is done. ....

·      How do you know when yours is done?....

OK, this is what we have done so far;

The date: February 14. Ken said that last Valentine's day was the best one he had ever had, so we decided that it would be great to celebrate our anniversary on that day. There was no way to find a date that worked for everyone, so we picked what worked for us.

The flower girl: Fiona has a dress, I don't but hey, first things first right? It's a pretty green number that satisfies her idea of an Irish wedding, you know, green? There maybe some other aspects that work with the Irish theme, I just haven't thought of them yet.

The location: A friend of mine, Cheryl, has offered her house for the entire event. It's a 4000 square foot log house that sits at the back of 40 acres. It's beautiful and I'm really touched by her offer.

The cake: Cheryl's housemate Lisa has asked if she could make the cake. She's never made a wedding cake before but figures she has enough time to practice. What the heck, again, I'm touched by the offer.

The rings: Ken used to design and make jewelry so he has an idea to make rings that match the engagement ring. I came up with the idea of making a ring for Fiona too. I've never heard of that but hey, when have I done anything according to the status quo?

I'm getting married! Yup! It's true!

I never thought it would happen but it has. I moved to Colorado, had my life turned completely upside down and in the middle of it all I fell in love. Life is amazing isn't it?

So far it's scheduled for Valentine's Day and most of my family will be here. It took some doing to find a date that worked for most of them. They will be coming from both coasts and I'm very excited to be having them all here.

There are of course lots of details to figure out but we're having fun with it. I think the next thing to do is send out "save the date" announcements and then start working on the actual invitations, right?

A lot of stuff came up when we talked about getting married. Not the least of which was the fact that each of us had decided that we would never get married again. Marriage is a lot of work and being single was just so much easier. But ya know, being with someone that loves and honors you is just so much fun. We decided to take a chance and I'm so glad we did.

More to follow……….

OK, this is it. How many courses, books, programs, workshops, clinics, speakers, tapes, CDs and DVDs have told me to create my own future, take control of my life both financially and personally and what have I done to do that?

Well, this is it. I get it. I really get it! I have been holding back because of fear. No news flash there right? But really, I've been working so hard at being brave and courageous that I never really stopped to see what was really scaring me.

This is what I now see. I've worked through the most obvious fears like flying, being trapped and elevators, still don't love them, but I can deal with it now. But now that those are dealt with, why am I still holding back? Well, in exploring that question (and it has not been comfortable but then real growth seldom is) I've discovered that I am afraid of the following:

I'm afraid of people not liking me.
I'm afraid that people will think I'm a bitch.
I'm afraid that people will think I'm rude.
I'm afraid that people will think I'm stupid.
I'm afraid my family will be disappointed in me.
I'm afraid my friends will be disappointed in me.
I'm afraid that taking a stand will offend people.
I'm afraid that making real money will put me in a class of people I don't like or worse, don't like me.
I'm afraid I won't know how to act if I was really successful.
I'm afraid that if I'm really successful it will piss off people I love.
I'm afraid that if I speak my mind I'll hurt someone.
I'm afraid that if I work for myself, from home, people won't take me seriously.
I'm afraid that people think I'm fat.
I'm afraid that if I eat wisely people will think I'm picky.
I'm afraid that if I go on a diet people won't want to spend time with me.
I'm afraid that if I don't do it exactly right (whatever it might be) I'll be judged and discredited.

It's amazing I can even leave the house much less live a full life. And this is just the beginning. I gotta tell ya though, in coming face to face with this aspect of myself I feel liberated, still scared, but freed up somehow. I can see hope again.

Dumping all this stuff out onto the table has it where I can see and now I can do something with it.

Life is changing at a break neck speed, well at least it seems that way. I've made this big move, from Arizona to Colorado, and even though I knew it would be hard, it is still harder than I thought it would be. Having friends make the move with me hasn't turned out quite the way I had thought. Knowing that communication is the key to pretty much everything doesn't mean that it happens naturally.

What I've learned about myself is that I am a very self-expressed person. I've never really given myself credit for it before but now that I live with three people that hardly ever show emotion or express themselves, I see it.

Being a person that lives out loud and loves full on seems to be difficult for those that don't. I never thought about it really, always being quick to beat myself up for being too emotional, too self-expressed, but now seeing the other side of the coin, I don't think I want to change it.

Life it seems is very much like an open bar, lots of options to choose from, some tasty, some bitter, some bland, some intense and always with the risk of over doing it. Perhaps the trick is making the mistakes, taking responsibility for them, learning from them and being willing to take more risks.

I learn more about myself everyday the time alone has been useful although it will be nice to have a social circle again, to be around people who aren't afraid of emotion and who aren't afraid of me. I tried changing, "toning it down some" but alas, it's just not me. I spent a couple of weeks being depressed until I realized that it's not me, this is who I am, and I make no apologies for being someone who feels and expresses everything full on.

So, until then, I am enjoying my own company and the company of my most perfect dogs, and of course you.

Thanks for dropping by.

It's all over the news, you know taking care of the environment, recycling and all that great stuff. I believe that most of us have done what we could on a day to day basis to do our part.

I've been doing just that for years. I use products for cleaning and skin care from Shaklee International. They've been around for over 40 years, and have had an unbending commitment to taking care of the planet and the people who live here. They don't test on animals and everything they produce is "green" by today's standards.

It is a home based business and I have finally decided not to be so selfish and share this stuff with you guys. Check it out at the link below and let me know what you think. Personally I love the laundry products and the skin care.

They have been around long enough to really know how to do it.

http://www.shaklee.net/meggberry

Let me know what you think!!!!

"Judge a person not by what others say of them, but rather by what they say of others."
Author unknown

I don't remember the first time I heard this but I certainly remember how powerfully it has impacted my life.

How is it that we can call people nasty, degrading names and then so easily justify it? If we are really on a path to "enlightenment" and working so hard on our "personal development", why are we still so quick to judge others so harshly? Perhaps the act of name-calling actually provides a measure of how well we're doing.

There are a couple of ways to look at the names that come out of our mouth (or on our computer) that can give us an indication of how well we're doing with all that effort we're putting into being a better person. Ultimately, we'd like to get to a place where name-calling simply doesn't come to our mind anymore, however that's a fairly long distance down that path for most of us.

Consider that if it comes out of our mouth in the heat of the moment, it must exist in our consciousness all the time and until that moment we may not have been aware of it. Even if we are sure we're not like that, that we "didn't really mean it." It came from somewhere and we are the only ones that can claim responsibility for it. It won't do any good to blame the media, the pop stars, the politicians or people we grew up watching. No matter how we look at it, it comes from within. This could be good news or bad news depending on how you choose to use it.

The bad news is that you said it and if you said it somewhere that others could hear it or see it it could come back to bite you. It's likely that you will have to use some of that personal growth training you've done to clean up the mess it most likely has caused.

The good news is that now you know where your personal development is in regards to where you started. For example, if you call someone a jerk today, but know that a year ago you would have called that person a bitch, or a bastard, or worse and you know what I mean, that could indicate that you've grown.

Does the act of calling someone a nasty, degrading name really do any good? Seriously? Does is it make you feel better? Does it inspire the person you are calling that name to want to change whatever behavior is offending you? I think not. I think it is more like adding fuel to the fire. Pretty much ensuring that you will never get the result you were hoping for in that relationship.

The name you're using can indicate the fundamentals of your overall mind set, even provide a measure of maturity. If you use racist terms, even silently, chances are you're a racist. If you use names that are clearly personally denigrating such as whore or ho, fat ass, dumb ass, dick head, faggot, you most likely have issues with the people you perceive to represent these. If you use more generic names such as asshole, bitch, jackass, etc., you most likely are simply pissed off.

None of this is necessarily true, it is simply an observation I've made since the Mel Gibson thing, the guy from Seinfeld and most recently Don Imes. I have been listening a bit more carefully lately and noticing how prevalent the name-calling is, and frankly it hurts my heart. No good comes from it, no one is the better for it and as far as I can tell it isn't of service to anyone.

Now that's not to say that I never call people names, I've been known to lower myself to it, usually in my car and occasionally in the company of others, which always ends up with me having to clean things up and apologize to someone. It hurts me to hurt someone and usually I don't know I've done it until it's too late. So in retrospect, I think I'd rather check myself first and avoid the whole thing.

Ah, the never ending road to being a grown up.

Well everyone, this will be a very exciting, albeit nerve racking, experience. I am planning a trip to the Grand Canyon to take a walk over the edge of world. I'd love to have some company so if there is anyone out there that would like to take that walk with me, I'd love the support.

 ..:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

It will be video taped and posted in a few different places. The local news will be there (hopefully) and who knows whom else!

 

If you have a fear of heights or if this thing just generally scares you this is a great opportunity to take on that fear, move beyond it, find out what you're really made of. The freedom you will have after accomplishing that? Well just let me say I know a little something about that and trust me it's worth the effort.

 

My plan is go do this before the end of May, I will put the details here as I get them. I'd love to hear from you about it!!!!

 

Come join me! It'll be a blast!

Please participate in this great idea of saying thanks to our troops. No matter what you think of the war, they are our troops, our families, our brothers, sisters, sons, daughters, husbands and wives. Let's say thanks as many ways as possible.

www.letssaythanks.com,

Hey, what happened, happened. Isn't that what we hear when we are a part of something stupid or painful? It's our friend's way of trying to alleviate our embarrassment and pain, our shame for our part in it. Ever notice though how ineffective those words actually are? OK, so we were a part of something that, well, for lack of a better way to say it, didn't go exactly as we might have planned. For example, you through a party for fifty and only five show up. Or, you say that one thing at the in-laws that you know you shouldn't bring up. Or you showed up someplace you weren't welcome. Or, you say something on national TV that gets edited just so. Before you realize it, you are a part of something you wish never happened.

 

So, what happened happened, right? Yeah, right. Like it's that easy to get over. I don't know about you but that stuff hits me square in the stomach. I feel nauseous, flushed, and pretty much like running as hard and fast as I can to the nearest closet and staying there until, well, eternity I guess.

 

Sometimes these moments are funny, however embarrassing, the other people involved can help you out by being good sports and laughing it off. I've noticed however that that's not often the case. For me, that moment usually feels damaging, may even be damaging. That I've hurt someone deeply, or that I've offended someone I really care about, to the point of causing a lasting pain, leaves me feeling small and terribly inadequate.

 

OK, so what's left is to learn from it and move on, hopefully quickly. But that only happens when you stay in action. The first thing to do is stop feeling ashamed and sorry for yourself. I know, easier said than done, but it's over, everyone lived through it, it may take time and you may have to deal with it one moment at a time in the beginning but it will pass. So the question to ask is "now what"? Now that I have been dealt these cards, how do I play them? What could I possibly learn from this? I hate that question, but only because it causes me to step out of the self-abuse and self pity and look forward. That always seems impossible in the moment, but it's not, it just feels that way.

 

I have found through experience that my pain goes away a lot faster if I share it rather than keep it bottled up. Yeah, I know, again easier said than done. But it works. Once I say out loud to someone who won't tease me about it or make me feel worse for what I've done, what's happened and how I feel about it, I experience a sense of freedom. The trick however is to share it with the intention of moving forward. If I share it from a place of whining or hoping to find agreement with how pitiful my life is, well that just perpetuates the problem and it never moves forward. If I don't hide from my emotions, but allow them to exist, being careful not to wallow in them, some how the pain dissipates, not all at once but over time, each day becomes easier. It's when we try to keep it all together, be cool, look like we have it all under control that we give up our real power.

 

Life happens. And no matter how hard we try to make it all turn out perfect, sometimes it just isn't going to be perfect. Life is messy. Sometimes those messes are little ones that over time we've become accustomed to dealing with. Those other times however, when the mess is so huge you swear it can never be cleaned up, it will never disappear. Well you will be right unless you get to work on it. Now is the time to choose if it's more important to be right about your life or admit the short comings and get the business of growing up and moving on. Often there are aspects of a particular incident that you will never get over, that will permanently affect your life. But you will move on. Life goes on, with or without us and we are the only ones that get to say which way it's going to happen. Courage is living your best life everyday, even when it hurts, even when it's scary, even when it's embarrassing, even when you have no idea how you can possibly get through the day.

 

Courage is having the willingness to ask yourself the tough questions, everyday, and the willingness to tell the truth when answering, then taking responsibility for the answers.

 

So on with it then. I don't know about you but I choose to move forward. No matter how hard it is and believe me it has felt like I would never move on again, I have faith that it will get better. Every little step you take for yourself makes a difference. Have faith, in yourself, in your choices and in whatever it is that gives you hope that tomorrow will be a better day.  We are all stronger than we think.