No, this doesn't mean I'm tired of actors and targeting sports stars now.

What you SHOULD be asking (since you're so curious) is where and with who Steve McNair was with when this all went down.

It never ceases to amaze me how mortals can be so morbid.

~ Grim D.

Oh, come on! Karl Malden was 97, and the only thing people actually remember him for was mentoring Michael Douglas on "The Streets of San Francisco."

But seriously, the surprise was that he was still alive, wasn't it?

~ Grim D.

I want you all to realize that people die everyday... a lot of them. I only seem busier because you actually know who these people are.

As to why Billy Mays was recalled, there's some whispering that the Catholic church could use a few pointers for a pitchman, and a few others besides. Seriously, if churches sold seats on Sunday like this guy sold orange spray, there wouldn't be an empty pew north or south of the Mason-Dixon line (now run to your Google maps and try to find it!)

~ Grim D.

Disclaimer: I am a collector of souls, not the cause for passing or the need to expire. I can only speculate on where the souls I reap go and why. It's your own fault if you're not living every day like it's your last.

Farrah Fawcett finally lost her battle with cancer. She will always be remembered as the pinup girl with one-piece bathing suit and great smile before proving herself as more than jiggle for "Charlie's Angels" with movies about burning beds and domestic violence.

Michael Jackson, on the other hand, was set for a sold-out concert tour to reclaim the throne as the self-proclaimed "King of Pop" (late of which Justin Timberlake was seen trying on the crown in a mirror).

To put this in perspective, however, almost thirty-five THOUSAND other people died today on this planet, but the one they'll remember is Michael Jackson.

Funny thing, too, because I said, "Look, Michael, there ARE simpler ways to get out of a concert tour commitment with your brothers." I think you'll believe he laughed.

The King of Pop is dead. Long live the King (and Charlie's other Angel).

I pledge to start posting here more often.

"Reaping & Critiquing" is what I keep telling you, right?

Since everyone already knows I put all my movie critiquing stuff on http://moviecrypt.com , I think it's only fair that I should post the "reaping" stuff over here on MySpace and Facebook, right?

So, Ed McMahon passed away at the age of 86, finally following in the footsteps of his buddy, Johnny Carson.

What does this really mean in the cosmic scheme of things?

Don't quote me, but I think with all the changes in late night television, I suspect that there's a divine being that decided to put and old show back together rather than watch reruns or the new shows that have replaced it.

David Letterman, watch your cholesterol, okay? I'm just saying.

~ Grim

Did you know my all-time favorite show, "Dead Like Me," is now a movie? Check it out for yourself.

Anyone who could give us Daryl Van Horne's pulpit speech in "The Witches of Eastwick" is okay in my book, and the last novel he wrote (or ever will) was a long-awaited sequel, "The Widows of Eastwick." Can a feature film be far behind? Probably not.

Let's all reminisce, shall we? From the top:

"Do you think God knew what He was doing when He created woman? Huh? No
sh*t. I really wanna know. Or do you think it was another one of His
minor mistakes like tidal waves, earthquakes, FLOODS? You think women
are like that? S'matter? You don't think God makes mistakes? Of course
He does. We ALL make mistakes. Of course, when WE make mistakes they
call it evil. When GOD makes mistakes, they call it... nature. So
whaddya think? Women... a mistake... or DID HE DO IT TO US ON PURPOSE?"

To quote Van Horne once again, "Cliche? Cliche... sure... but true."

Isn't that diabolical? (insert appropriately sinister laugh here)

Eartha Baby, purr for me under the tree, Just me.
you're an awful good girl, Eartha baby,
shuffle off that mortal coil tonight.

Eartha baby, a 54 recording debut,
From you.
I'll wait up for you dear,
Eartha baby, shuffle off that mortal coil tonight.

Think of all the fun you've had,
Think of all the fellas who'll all be sad,
Next year you could be just as good,
But I've checked you off my Christmas list,

Eartha baby, you're hot,
And really that's quite a lot,
Try an angel next year,
Eartha baby, shuffle off that mortal coil tonight.

Eartha honey, there's one thing you really must know,
Your show
Is at the end of its line,
Eartha honey, shuffle off that mortal coil tonight.

Eartha baby, forgot to mention one little goal,
Your soul.
Not the one on your shoe,
Eartha baby, shuffle off that mortal coil tonight.
That mortal coil tonight.
Coil, tonight.

It's been coming for a long while now, but the man who discovered Ray Bradbury and launched "Famous Monsters of Filmland" has passed away at the age of 92. The following account did not happen and did not take place, but I wish with all my heart that it had.

As I escorted Mr. Ackerman to his final destination, two men dressed in black suits and dark glasses appeared. One had a distinctive third eye, while the other made no effort to conceal that he had tentacles instead of hands. They offered no identification but politely explained that Mr. Ackerman had a previously-arranged transport waiting for him.

Turning to Forrest, I asked if he wanted to go with the men in black, to which he smiled and nodded. As he turned to walked away, a crack of thunder overhead announced the arrival of a huge, disk-shaped craft descending through the clouds. It was a all metallic silver except for a luminous blue orb at its center, pulsating like the eye of a god. A translucent beam came down from the orb and encapsulated Forrest and the two men. At that moment, Forrest turned back toward me and the earth that he called his home, and I believed I saw him mouth the words, "Beast Witches" one final time.

All three disappeared as the beam vanished, and the orb overhead changed color to match the underside of the craft. With a loud hum, it ascended into the sky and vanished into the clouds. Fortunately, I knew there wouldn't be too much to explain. After all, those same two guys took Rod Serling and Vincent Price already.

ATTENTION PEOPLE OF EARTH: DR. ACULA HAS LEFT THE PLANET. YOU WILL BE MISSED, 4E.