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Who Reads This Shit Anyway? Diary of a so-called "rock star."

Official Tim Napalm (aka Tim Stegall) Profile

Tim Napalm aka Tim stegall


Last Updated: 10/23/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 44
Sign: Virgo

City: Phoenix
State: Arizona
Country: US
Signup Date: 2/23/2008

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Friday, November 06, 2009 

Current mood:really don't want it, really don't need it....
Category: Life

Jesus, I'm dead?! That's news to me....


By now, some of you have probably read about how I helped dispel the Chuck Biscuits death rumors that were choking the internet a week ago Thursday. Some of you may have even followed my posts (here, there, and this one, too) as I made some attempt to stem the tide of misinformation as it was rapidly spiraling on the web. The whole story is fascinating, especially as it points out some of the more serious flaws in modern journalism and the internet's power.

Basically, a rock critic and blogger named James Greene, Jr., was the subject of a nasty practical joke, preying on his love of the D.O.A./Black Flag/Circle Jerks/Danzig/Social Distortion drum dynamo. Someone had been emailing Greene for months, posing either as Chuck or his wife, claiming Chuck was dying of throat cancer. The punch line, delivered in the form of a phony email from Chuck's family claiming he'd passed Oct. 24, had some decidedly unfunny consequences.

Once Greene posted this obituary for Biscuits, it's shocking how viral it went. More shocking was how quickly it was picked up by mainstream media, including NPR and the NME (although they quickly retracted their item once the truth was out, posting this, instead). This modest blog post was accepted as the gospel truth on Biscuits' death, with no one asking the family for confirmation, it seems.

I first got word of the possibility of Biscuits' death when a pal asked what I'd heard about it. He then turned around and asked punk artist Bad Otis Link, a former business partner of Biscuits' in the '80s, who shot back that he'd received an email from Biscuits just the night before. My pal then mentioned that Otis had just gotten off the phone with Biscuits' older brother, Bob Montgomery, and the family had not been notified. That's when I got suspicious.

I quickly added Otis on Facebook and began reposting his own status-messages-cum-bulletins refuting the rumors. (Sample, spelling and grammar Otis' own:
"Otis Link CHUCK BISCUITS!!!! Not True to me until the dead guy sings!
I cant keep up with the calls and the emails, here is what I know.
Chuck sent me an email last night at 11:55 DEAD MEN DONT EMAIL!
I talked with Bob, chucks brother today, Chucks family has not been notified of a death. Normally they are told if their brother or son is sick or dead.
A rumor started in august about cancer, Chuck was fine then too.") Pretty soon, another mutual friend of mine and DOA leader Joey Shithead confirmed he'd just gotten off the phone with Shithead, who had just gotten off the phone with an irritated and confused Biscuits. (I love the Biscuits quote Otis relayed to us: "This is fucking retarded!") I simply passed the news along as I got it, knowing the lies were upsetting a lot of people. It all climaxed with a note from Bob Montgomery's wife, Tabitha, personally thanking me for helping get the truth out there and offering confirmation that Bob had spoken with a very much alive-and-well Chuck Biscuits.

In all honesty, I am as surprised I was a source for the truth as I'm sure James Greene, Jr., was in inadvertantly being a source for the misinformation. (As can be seen in his follow-up blog, Greene was quite embarassed and humiliated in accidentally originating the story.) I'm glad I could help, but I was merely being a good journalist.

Some serious lessons can be learned from this incident, ones which could be taught in journalism classes. For one, why did mainstream news outlets take the word of a blogger at face value and not contact the family of Chuck Biscuits himself in reporting this "news?" Nor even contact perhaps a publicist for one of the many bands Biscuits had passed through, especially Danzig, which was a successful act during Biscuits' time therein? I know I was taught you need solid confirmation and a few quotes from relevant parties before you dare go to press with a story like that. Verily, can anyone imagine the grief the Montgomery family was put through that day, never mind Chuck Biscuits' many fans who went public in celebrating him in his "death?"

I can't completely throw stones. I will admit, in the past, to hastily perpetrating rumors in MySpace bulletins and the like. Hence, when Lux Interior died, I made sure to get solid word before absolutely announcing his death. The internet is a very powerful tool. As this illustrates, news can spread at lightning speed because of the 'net. This is very good thing. But any good thing can be abused and misused. Who knows what scruples, if any, the originating pranksters have. They probably didn't care that a whole lot of people could be hurt in the process when they sent James Greene, Jr., those communiques from "Chuck." They just wanted to make him look foolish, for whatever reason. Equally uncool.

Greene isn't to be pilloried for this. He had no idea what would result from what had been intended as a tribute to a hero he'd thought dead. Thankfully, the internet was used to get the truth out there as quickly as it had spread the lie. Unfortunately, many who use the medium would rather abuse the internet than use it. I don't see that changing anytime soon.

Here's a good example of what would have been lost, had Chuck Biscuits actually passed: Vintage DOA with "World War 3," featuring a 13-year-old Biscuits detonating his drumkit like the bastard punk rock spawn of Keith Moon. Enjoy!




Currently listening:
Where The Action Is! Los Angeles Nuggets 1965-1968
By Various Artists
Release date: 2009-09-22
Thursday, November 05, 2009 

Current mood:just seems a little weird....
Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
I'm being trained, and my trainer and I are talking. Suddenly, we hear the gent on the other side of the partition ask, "Hello, may I please speak with Rick Nielsen?"

Naturally, my trainer and I shoot each other a look.

The guy over the partition gets rebuttalled hither and yon until he's finally off the phone. I ask, "Hey, by chance, were you calling Rockford, IL?"

"Why, yes I was," he answered. "Why?"

"You," I smiled, "may just have pitched the lead guitarist from Cheap Trick...."




No, Rick didn't purchase a home-based business plan today. Then again, I wasn't the one who called him, either....

Still, I wonder if Rick told the old guy, "I'm on the road 200 dates a year! I don't have time for a home-based business!"

More tomorrow, including a bit on the Chuck Biscuits death hoax. Thanks for reading this.

Currently listening:
The Alchemist of Pop: Home Made Hits and Rarities 1959-1966
By Joe Meek
Release date: 2002-07-01
Friday, October 23, 2009 

Current mood:curious
Category: Life
........
Greetings from my concrete bunker in Central Phoenix (or, as it will be known when “RADIO NAPALM” returns, “the new swamp-cooled, adobe garage in Central Phoenix”). No, I still don't have internet service there. I had a backup plan to get it temporarily going before my roommate arrives next month, but that'll have to be shelved now that I've lost my job.

Yeah, I know. No, I really don't want to talk about it. Suffice to say my sales were not suiting the big boss. Fine. The good thing is, I seem to be able to get hired as quickly in this town as I've now become accustomed to in my middle age. But it's harder to do when you have but one more check coming, and your internet usage is confined to when you can sit at wi-fi hotspots.

It is what it is. Yeah, I'm bummed. Not emotionally crippled, just bummed. Not even publicly soliciting sympathy, as I've been known to do in the past. I'd rather just get on with it and try to make this condition as temporary as possible. Guess I've done some growing up, huh?

A side effect of not having internet which has been both good and bad has been being cut off from the news. Since I refuse to have a television (and I can't for my life of me find a daily paper here other than the statewide Arizona Republic, which appears to have a rather conservative slant from what I can tell), my only source of info has been the i-nets for awhile. It's been deliciously good for my health not having to read about whatever's the latest thing Mr. Obama has done that's got the Crazy White People screaming bloody murder. This level of fanaticism has been greatly taxing on me, and it's nice not to have it assaulting me, whether it be from the wire services or via various Facebook pals' postings.

But in the process, I've missed a few items that would definitely have concerned me. One would be the death of Brendan Mullen. The other would be the President being awarded a Nobel Peace Prize.

There'll be a good many of you grunting “who?” at Brendan's mention. Unless you were there or are a punk history buff, you'll have no idea who he is. The man was simply at the center of most things musically interesting in Los Angeles since 1977, when he opened a club beneath a porn theater in Hollywood called The Masque, an absolute toilet of a performance space that ended up punk rock's Ground Zero in LA. He gave a stage to bands you likely now worship like X, The Germs, The Weirdos, The Bags, The Go-Gos, Fear, The Screamers, The Flesh Eaters, The Plugz and hundreds more, when they couldn't get a stage otherwise. He would go on to book other worthy venues, like Club Lingerie, then became LA punk's recording angel. In said function, he authored or co-authoed the excellent We Got The Neutron Bomb (which took Legs McNeil and Gillain Cain's Please Kill Me concept, applied it to LA, and may have possible improved on said concept), the Darby Crash/Germs bio Lexicon Devil, and his recent book-length Masque photo essay, Nightmare In Punk Alley. And now he's dead way too young, just turned 60, apparently from a stroke.

Those are the bare facts. I knew Brendan, but not well. He and I met via Facebook earlier this year and kept up a spirited correspondence, and not always the most cordial one (although it was always with respect and affection). The man, like any good Scotsman, was opinionated and feisty as hell, and never afraid to speak his mind or get in a good scrap. The very first time we had an IM chat, we actually got into it over whether the New York Dolls could actually play or not! Followed immediately with his insistence, “Tim, you misunderstand me: I love the Dolls! But they still couldn't play for fuck!” (I just had to pause and laugh at that one.)

I won't instantly deify Brendan, as many will be wont to do. After all, how can I worship a man who'd speak so ill of the Dolls? Hahahaha! I do know he was a wonderful thinker and a great spirit that I wish I'd gotten to know much better. It was in the cards: We made loose plans to get together and tape a “RADIO NAPALM” episode he'd co-host next time I made it to LA. Sadly, this will now not happen. I've no idea if he suffered in death, or in life, for that matter. I do wish him peace, however. You have my eternal respect, Brendan. Even if you now can't take back what you said about the Dolls, fucker! Hahahaha!

As for that Nobel Peace Prize: How does a President currently engaged in at least two wars that I know of merit this? Admittedly, both wars were inherited, but he doesn't seem to be doing much to end them. And he's even amped up our Afghanistan involvement. How exactly does this contribute to the cause of peace?

Some of you may be shocked to read these words from me. Yes, I support Mr. Obama wholeheartedly. But he has also done much to disappoint me, although I don't think he's the evil bogeyman all the Crazy White People seem to believe he is. Maybe just not as progressive as he seemed, and a little too soft-spoken and even-handed at times for his own good. But under what criteria does he get this prize? If Obama ends these wars, I will present him the Nobel Peace Prize personally, and give him a hearty “Job well-done, Barry!” But in the meantime, you may as well give me or Bullwinkle Moose a Nobel!
Monday, October 05, 2009 

Current mood:searching out the alternatives....
Category: Life
........
Hope I haven't scared ya with my lack of internet presence, of late. I simply haven't had internet service at my place for the past week.
Through a lovely piece of serendipity, I have now inherited the apartment I've been staying at since arriving
 in Phoenix, thanks to my host family's finding and moving into a new place at rather frightening speed. In this time frame, I've also:

1.Left one job for another, after a misunderstanding.
2.Left the new job to return to the old job, after being treated like an incompetent asshole pretty quickly. It's a long story.

What this all means, is some gaps in income, as rent for my place now comes due.
So, certain sacrifices have to be made briefly as I adjust. One of those being new internet service.

Hence, I post this from a McDonald's. At least Mickey D's has okay coffee in its' favor.

But don't think I've been sitting in the dark, twiddling my thumbs without having the internet as my friend. Dust has not been settling
beneath me in the least. Majorly, I'm back at work on my long-in-the-works first novel, with an aim to finish by years' end.

I have spent at least four years writing notes (as well as an actual chapter here and there) for this autobiographical work of fiction,
dealing with my severely effed relationship with my father as the basis for this story of a small-time, down-on-his-luck punk rock musician named John Paul Gentry
(AKA Johnny Suicide) , traveling by Greyhound to his home state of Texas to settle the affairs of his long-estranged alcoholic father, OJ Gentry.
As the bus rolls across America, he reflects on their story and discovers a few things about himself that rather disturb him. So far, so good. All I need is a title.
And maybe a literary agent.

So, no worries, all. I'm alive, but taking a brief sabbatical to tackle more important things.
I promise to be back in no time.

Thanks for reading this. Now if you'll excuse me, I surely have a million messages to an
swer....


Sunday, September 27, 2009 

Current mood:doin' the dog....
Category: Music



Before there was punk rock, there was punk rock. And before that, there was punk rock. And I'd venture to guess if you'd dig even further back, you'd find punk rock.

Point being, there's many buried chapters in the punk rock story, ripe for exploring. Earlier this year, a whole lotta frenzy was whipped up by the discovery of demos from lost '70s Detroit monsters Death. Who knows how these scorched and healing ears will react once they get a load of The Imperial Dogs?

In short, LA's punk scene did not commence once Brendan Mullen opened the Masque and Slash began publication. It honestly began much earlier, when four graduates of North Torrance High School drove into Hollywood to see Iggy And The Stooges and New York Dolls at the Whiskey on separate occasions, and decided blooze-based rock was not the way to go. Black leather and chains  and louder amps and sinister vibes and decadence all took hold, and they changed their name to The Imperial Dogs. For their trouble, they left behind four gigs and change, some shitty live cassettes and a rehearsal tape clear enough to yield a posthumous 45 and retrospective LP, and a song title ("This Ain't The Summer Of Love") and line in a chorus strong enough for Blue Oyster Cult to pay 'em a little money to refashion into a new song BOC would ride into glory. The singer (Don Waller) would become a rock critic of strong repute who would literally write the book on Motown, among other things. The others would do their things. And that should be that, right?

Wrong. A primitive live video surfaced, from a time when it was rare for young garage bands to create such documents. And it shows them doing what they did best: Creating a noise that could be an American Radio Birdman, wedding the snotty Stones rock of the New York Dolls and '60s garage bashing with the intellectual metal of BOC, in front of a collegiate audience looking positively poleaxed. And now it's out on DVD, available directly from the band themselves.

A website has been set up just for this, featuring a pair of video highlights to sample. You can click here to dig in full, as I recommend you should. And for their story in full (written by yours' truly, natch), the forthcoming issue of Ugly Things garagezine will present just that. Meantime, I offer you a little taste of The Imperial Dogs before you go to the band's website: Their anthem "Midnight Dog," which The Stooges likely would have killed to have written. Enjoy!





Friday, September 25, 2009 

Current mood:trying to shake the grog factor
Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
* Not every phone job will require you to convince some hostile ass that he's actually more "innarested" in your kind offer to cut the price on his Playboy subscription than he realizes. Some will actually allow you to hang up and move on.

* This significantly cuts down on stomach acid levels.

* Not everyone is as old and full of arcane knowledge as you to understand why the name "Krishna P. Dass" appearing on a phone list is funny. Some of them will be your boss. (NOTE: If I'm not mistaken, that is the name of the founder of Hare Krishna, isn't it? I'm actually most likely completely off, and The Boss was right to look at me like I was a small, dull child.)

The melatonin regime (see yesterday's blog) is cutting my patience and creativity. Therefore, I shall keep this one brief. Meantime, I leave you with one more reason to keep living and believe in the healing power of the electric guitar: Magic Sam, caught live and loud, tearing the shit outta Earl Hooker's guitar in glorious black & white. For more on Magic Sam and why you really need to suck up all he put out, check out Jim Marshall's immaculate The Hound Blog entry on Sam, by clicking right here. And now, I do believe I need to dust my broom....


Thursday, September 24, 2009 

Current mood:scraping the mucous off my brain
........
Welcome to my nightmare....

Okay, this must be the part of the sleeping cycle where I can't get to sleep until dawn for a couple of nights, so I'm forced to take melotonin for awhile until I get back to my normal sleeping cycle. Then I sleep past my alarm and feel like shit for awhile, until the coffee kicks in. Geeze, I love that....

Yup, it's been awhile since I checked in. And major changes are up, all for the better. The big one starting today would be a new job.

The last one? Well, it got my foot in this town's door. Met some great people, friends I'll probably carry through life. But the job itself still wasn't the greatest idea.

It was a sales job, for one thing. And although I'm a phone professional of 12 years' standing, I hate doing telemarketing. I'll do survey work, appointment setting, qualifying, customer service, anything BUT telemarketing. And I violated my own law for once, just to start making a paycheck.

But...three weeks in, and the joint's ownership decides production's not what it should be. Everyone's sales are down, due to the natural scaling back of purchases once school kicks in and families are reeling from having just bought clothing and school supplies, etc. But the ownership decides we're all just slacking. So crap gets dumped on the management's heads, and it starts running down and plopping on the heads at my level.

Well, I was micromanaged last week until I had four anxiety attacks in a row. After not having any of those for a year. Is this healthy, I ask you?

Not for me, it isn't. And when Sunday night became Monday morning, and I was still awake, listening to my alarm go off, and I get a fifth anxiety attack thinking about having to go to work on no sleep, knowing I had been promised yet another talk about my performance (when I am doing the best I can with what I have), I decided I wasn't going to sit through that talk. Nor would I sit in that office again.

Two days later, I applied at a magazine subscription service for a customer service position and got it. I start today, at a far better pay scale than what I had at the telemarketing place.

Now I gotta run. I need to clean up and do some stuff before going in for my first shift there. More tomorrow and the next day, including some big changes at “RADIO NAPALM,” a new (to you) obscure protopunk band's resurrection, and all that other fun stuff. Thanks for reading this.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009 

Current mood:hitting the dusty trail....
Category: Music



TIM SEZ: Oddly enough, the Austin Chronicle website dropped my byline on this, one of the pieces I'm proudest of. But write this, I did. And I'm damned proud of it. Exchange left out of the article: "TIM: Have you ever written a bad song? WILLIE: (with a twinkle in his eye) Nope! (much laughter) At least, none that YOU'LL ever hear...." First published February 9, 1996....

Mother never said there'd be days like these. She never said that 12 years of professional rock journalism wouldn't be enough preparation for this spectacle: sitting in the driver's seat of the sort of deluxe tour bus strictly reserved for Nashville's royalty, waiting to do an interview, watching a near-Beatlemania crush of humanity outside on Sixth Street. Watching an audience waiting for at least a glimpse of the bus' cargo, 63-year-old Willie Hugh Nelson, son of Ira and Myrtle, native son of Abbott, Texas.

And the mob scene just a windshield away is nothing compared to the one that could be seen inside the Hang 'Em High Saloon, where Nelson had minutes earlier completed a set that was his usual updated and expanded version of Willie and Family Live, right down to the traditional fanfare of "Whiskey River" into "Stay a Little Longer" into his And-Then-I-Wrote medley of Nashville songmill standards a la "Crazy" and "Funny How Time Slips Away." So intense was that crush, that the cabbie taking me home would grouse about he and his wife sitting inside Hang 'Em High for several hours before the concert and getting pushed out into the melée once Nelson and Family took the stage some five-odd hours later, never to reclaim their seats.

Outside, part of that melée, young nubile women flirting hard with stony security, are hoping to god for a chance to share their dangerous charms with a man old enough to be their father twice over. Inside the bus, Nelson does have a visitor: Bruce Springsteen, in town to play a show of his own. He's come by with Joe Ely to pay his respects. The only sane reaction to this whole scene has to be, "What in Christendom's name was Columbia Records thinking, dropping any artist who can inspire this?"


What, indeed. Nashville's none too kind to its veteran artists these days. To listen to modern country radio is to believe the music's history started with "Achy Breaky Heart." Eighteen years' worth of remarkable songs, adventurous records, and music governed by nothing but sheer artistry that somehow manages to play with the masses... all that apparently means nil to Columbia, outside of a three-disc box set. Maybe radio is too preoccupied with hat acts to give Nelson some play, but surely anyone who can inspire such rampant Williemania can still sell records.


"You would think so," muses Willie Nelson, a man remarkably unaffected by 18 years of scenes like the one above. "You would hope that they would think that," he laughs. "But in reality, maybe they wouldn't. Maybe they still don't get it.


"But it's a fad, it's a phase," he reasons, graciously pouring another cup of strong black coffee for himself and his visitor. "It's... something that will pass. The good artists will survive, and the soundalikes... Somebody said the other day that country music, nowadays, sounds a lot like bad rock & roll." He laughs.


It sounds like the Eagles, a band that ruined rock & roll in the Seventies and is now ruining country music in the Nineties.


"A lot of it does sound like the Eagles," agrees Nelson. "But it's hard to water it down. It won't water down. Once you start watering a little bit, it's so obvious: to me, to you, to most people out there. But there's some point or other, I think, where if you water it down just enough, spread it out into each market, you might tag a few of these and tag a few of those, or you might fool some of the new folks coming in and tell 'em, ..This is country music.' But when they come out tonight or whenever, they know better. They know what they like. They might not be able to hear it on this station, but they can hear it across the street at this other station."


Or they could go to Emo's. It's getting to where the best place for country legends to find some appreciation is the alternative rock scene. (Neighbor, can ya say "Johnny Cash?" I think ya can.) The honesty and spirit of the music appears to resonate with that crowd. And Willie Nelson cuts as punk rock a figure as anyone: the man has continually followed no master save for his own creativity and imagination, told any record company or anyone else who advised him to do otherwise to kindly go fuck themselves, and has been (oddly) commercially rewarded for doing so. Therefore, it makes total sense that Justice Records, the Houston indie that has released the most recent Willie Nelson records, has put together Twisted Willie, a collection of the man's stuff interpreted by several punk and grunge icons.


"I like the idea that it's happening," Willie says of the tribute record. "I like [the] idea that the young kids are into my music. It's flattering." He admits he hadn't heard much alternative music before hearing the record. "I'd heard some of the names of the bands, but as far as hearing them, I've never had an opportunity to. Now that I've heard 'em, they're bands that I'd go see. I'd go see the Supersuckers. I'd go see L7 or the Reverend Horton Heat. There's some good entertainers there."


"Why's Willie suddenly a hit with grunge bands and punkers?" a friend asked as we sat around his living room one night, giving Twisted Willie a listen. I replied that it probably wasn't an instant phenomenon. The selection of tunes is too much the work of a batch of connoisseurs: not just classics like "Time of the Preacher" (sung by Johnny Cash, backed by a band consisting of folks from Nirvana, Soundgarden, and Alice in Chains), "Shotgun Willie" (Tenderloin) or "I Gotta Get Drunk" (Gas Huffer), but ultraobscurities like "Three Days" (by L7 receiving an assist from Waylon Jennings) and "Hotel Motel" (X). There's such an innate familiarity with the guy's work present on Twisted Willie that Nelson's music had to be a daily fact of household life among these musicians in their youth.


Nelson agrees. "That's the only thing that I can figure out. They must have heard them a long time ago. Most of the songs -- all of 'em! -- are obscure songs that you just don't turn on the radio and hear. None of 'em really got a lot of airplay. ..Sad Songs and Waltzes' (rendered by Jesse Dayton) is from the time I was living in Nashville, and sad songs and waltzes just weren't selling that year!" He grins.


"But I don't know where they heard some of these songs. Some of 'em, like ..Bloody Mary Morning,' I do every night in my show. The Supersuckers, I know where they got that one. That song, ..I've Seen All This World I Care To See' (Jerry Cantrell)? Where in the world did they find that one? I don't think that I ever recorded it, unless there's an old demo of it or something somewhere."


Which isn't to say old demos are where Nelson's music is currently residing. In point of fact, Nelson has just signed a three-album deal with Island Records. And true to form, he already has two records in the can, with a third in progress. There's a fairly straight CD's worth of music, titled Spirit, on the way, some of which was previewed at Hang 'Em High (including a title track featuring a long, flamenco-tinged intro). Hot on its heels is...


...a reggae record.


No, today's date is not April 1.


"It was [producer] Don Was' idea," Nelson explains as he reaches for his bus' sound system and punches in a cassette. What comes out is heavy, deep, classic, late-Seventies-style reggae, backing Nelson's unmistakable tenor sax-like vocals and the Django-toned bark of his battered classical guitar, Trigger. The versions of Jimmy Cliff's "Many Rivers to Cross" and "The Harder They Come" that are previewed are easily solid enough that the man should consider releasing a companion dub version of the record.


Also in progress is an electric blues record, featuring the talents of Austin's finer blues players, including George Rains, Derek O'Brien, and Jon Blondell. "Actually," remarks Nelson as we listen to a crying, B.B.-like track from that project, "Island wants the third album to be a best-of or something, where I go back and redo all the old stuff. But since I have this blues album, I might try to talk them into putting that one out, instead. We can always go back and do a best-of!"


Nelson envisions the latter album as having new versions of all the old faves like "Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain," "On the Road Again," and the like, plus true and ancient artifacts like "Crazy," "Night Life," and "Funny How Time Slips Away." The record could work in ways such records rarely work, considering how Nelson continually reinterprets even his own material, all but sticking to the recorded arrangement. "That's mainly because I can't remember how it goes!" he jokes.


If that's not enough to keep the man occupied, there's his tour schedule. "I play 150-date[s]-a-year, between what I do with my band and what I do with the Highwaymen. Leon Russell and I are gonna be doing some dates together, just he and I. Gregg Allman and I are doing some dates together, just he and I. Merle Haggard and I are gonna be doing some dates together this year. We're just gonna go out with a couple of guitars."


That's a nice way to live your life: free to work with people you admire, free to work in ways that feel good to yourself, free from having to work for the marketplace. You have to wonder if Nelson will cut the 3,998,413th version of "Got My Mojo Workin'" for his blues record, as the man appears to have had a mojo working on his behalf since "Hello, Walls." And that mojo's made him impervious to the tax men, to Columbia Records, to sinking commercial prospects, to writer's block, and artistic bankruptcy. (Although, by all reports, it hasn't improved his golf game any.)


It also must have granted him the strength to remain realistic and centered enough to withstand mob scenes rocking his plush Country and Western Legend Tour Bus on Sixth Street in our town or any other. And Williemania's only a tenth as maniacal as the insanity that surrounded less hardy souls like Elvis Presley. Maybe Willie Nelson can earn a little extra pocket change loaning little pieces of that mojo to upstart legends in the making and help reduce the world's tragedy quotient. I know a few folks who could use some of that mojo now.


Friday, September 11, 2009 

Current mood:respectful
Category: Life
TIM SEZ: Repost from last year. Ike fizzled before he got to Austin, but the rest of this still applies


 

Current mood:  contemplative
Category: Life
It looks pretty certain the day after my birthday, I'm riding out a hurricane. Odd, for the Austin area. Where I grew up, it was more common: I'd been through three by the time I was a teenager, the last one I've been through being Allen back in 1980 (I think it was). Not a big deal, really. By the time Ike hits here, he's gonna be a lotta wind and rain, really.

But, come on, Ike: Could your timing be any worse?

It's kinda par for the course, right now. Something about this decade and my birthday has meant disaster for me. There was the girlfriend who decided to break up with me the week of my birthday, just because that would sting the most, I'm sure. Then, there was the birthday on which Johnny Cash had the misfortune of dying. That really sucked.

But I think the coldest was the group of middle eastern gentlemen who thought it would be really cool to fly a couple of airplanes into the World Trade Center the day before my birthday in 2001.

I slept through it. I was homeless at the time and staying with a friend on 7th and Ave. B, probably three or four miles from the Twin Towers. She was out of town, and I was house-sitting, soon to move in with my friend Sami Yaffa and his girl Karmen. I was working at the time as a professional dog walker, and I got up at 11 AM. It was supposed to be just another day: I was thinking about coffee, looking over the schedule, wondering who the first dog of the day would be, etc., etc. I turned on Howard Stern's show, as was my wont back then (until he said something completely insulting about John Lee Hooker on the day Hook died, and I swore I'd never listen to the tasteless bastard again). And judging by the hysteria I was hearing, it was the end of the world.

I called my boss to find out what was going on. That was when I found out the towers had been hit.

From there, people were calling in left and right, canceling walks; most of our customer base worked in the financial district, so they were now gonna be home. I was getting all kinds of bits and pieces from there: The doorman at the building on Irving Place where a few of my dogs lived looking up and seeing the first jet flying so close to the ground, he could see its' markings. My friend Mark who lived two blocks away calling me up and telling me he was on the phone, talking to his mother, looking out his panoramic view of the southern end of Manhattan...and seeing that same jet fly right past his building, shaking him and the whole building. And getting a front row seat at watching it crash straight into Tower Number One.

These calls were going on for three hours. I couldn't sit down to eat. Finally, about 2 PM, I was able to leave the apartment and walk down to Ave. A, in search of breakfast. Every joint in the neighborhood was crammed to the rafters, it seemed. There were hand-written signs in the windows, advising that the Red Cross needed blood, go to this hospital or that one, go to Bellvue, go someplace, we need blood. The air smelled awful, like burning tires or hair, but worse. It would be that way for months. And can you imagine what it does to a mind, knowing that what you're breathing might be friends of yours'?

I finally squeezed into Sidewalk Cafe, ran into friends I knew from the local rock circuit. The waitresses and bartenders looked like they were gonna have coronaries. My waitress confided in me that they were severely understaffed, especially with the crush they were experiencing, and people due to work that day who lived out in Brooklyn or wherever were calling in because the subways were now shut down and they couldn't make it in. She looked like she was about to cry. Seconds later, some jerk at the table next to me started cursing her out about how long it was taking for him to get his eggs. I slammed my fist on his table and shocked him: "DUDE, DO YOU GET IT? CAN YOU LOOK AROUND YOU? DO YOU SEE HOW OVERWORKED THESE PEOPLE ARE RIGHT NOW? CAN YOU TURN AROUND AND SEE THE COLUMN OF SMOKE WHERE THE WORLD TRADE CENTER USED TO BE? CAN YOU FOR ONCE IN YOUR GAWDFERSAKEN EXISTENCE STOP THINKING ABOUT YOURSELF AND TRY TO PUT YOURSELF IN THE SHOES OF THE PEOPLE WORKING HERE AND THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU?"

"What are you getting mad at me for?" he whined. "It's not my fault they don't have enough people working. I'm hungry." I just stared at him.

I decided to wander a bit after eating and having coffee. People were then walking up from around the disaster site, walking because the subways were shut down, and no cabs can be found. They were covered in soot, looking like some ancient Jack Kirby panel out of a '60s Marvel comic. I ran into Jesse Malin, on his way to buy a protein bar and a newspaper. We started talking about The Strokes' debut album, which had just been released a few days before. (Or maybe that was only in the UK? Well, copies were obviously getting around on import.) And I remember at the time thinking, "Why are we talking about The Strokes in the middle of this?!"

My cellphone rang. It was my mother. She'd been trying to reach me for hours. The satellite dishes for the cellphone companies were based at the Twin Towers. Finally, a provisionary satellite path was opened, and she could know I was alive. The family were scared shitless: They had no idea of the geography of Manhattan, and for all they knew, I could be dead.

I went back to the apartment and finally turned on the news. For hours, my eyes were raped with endless repeats of the footage of those planes crashing into those towers. It was relentless. I finally had to turn it off and order pay-per-view porn. After all, what's amoral here: Being bombarded with footage of the WTC being penetrated hard and fast by terrorist-commandeered planes? Or being bombarded with footage of Jenna Jameson getting penetrated hard and fast from various angles?

The days and weeks after were like nothing I'd ever experienced. I remember having to wear a filter mask as I did the dogwalks for a long time, and suffering massive headaches from the air quality. For awhile, you would be forced to present ID at two different checkpoints to MPs if you lived in the East Village, just to get to and from your apartment. Armed personnel carriers would be going up and down Houston St. The middle eastern guys who ran the deli downstairs looked at me with pleading, fearful eyes that told me they were already getting harassed for the color of their skins and their accents. Probably by the same louts I heard that Friday up and down Avenue B, drunkenly chanting, "U! S! A! U! S! A!" I feared those clowns more than I did potential terrorists.

I can remember my mother and I talking, and she kept telling me, "We all understand. We all are with you. We're all going through this together." And I had to tell her that no, there was no way she could understand unless she was here. She got to watch this from the safety of her living room. This wasn't TV for me or anyone else in NYC. This was our life. And it wasn't fun, and I hoped that she (and everyone else who didn't live here) never had to find out what I was going through.

The worst was finding out how one of my dearest friends was affected by this: Johnny Heffernan was one of my local brothers in rock. His band The Bullys was one of Napalm Stars' brother bands. Johnny was frequently there when I needed him, whether I needed to borrow an amp, or whether I was having to fend off an obnoxious and violent stage invader. I considered him one of my best friends. He was to have left on my birthday to go on tour with The Toilet Boys, doing their lighting.

Johnny was also a NYC fire fighter.

He was not supposed to be on duty on Sept. 11, 2001. It was supposed to be his day off. He was working instead, trying to get in overtime before he left on the road, to support his wife and young stepdaughter. His company was among the first to repsond when Tower Number One was hit. From what I remember, most (if not all) of his company was buried when the tower collapsed. Johnny's bandmates, family, friends, we all held hope that he was still alive. They pulled Johnny's crushed body out one month later.

We all know who killed my friend, as well as the many others who died that day. America invaded Afghanistan shortly after, gunning for Osama Bin Laden. Over time, our leaders began telling us Iraq had some connection with the WTC attacks, that they had weapons of mass destruction, that Saddaam Hussein had something to do with this. This, of course, turned out not to be the case. We are still at war in Iraq. Osama Bin Laden, the man who commanded the men who killed my friend and all those others, remains free.

Happy birthday.
Thursday, September 10, 2009 

Current mood:rockin' a little while
Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
... I found myself calling a Mr. Stiltskin (first name: Rumple) and Happy Gilmore. Yesterday, it was The Attack Of Names Without Vowels: How do you pronounce "Dkdk?" Is it "Dickdick?" Or like one of those African bushman languages that are all tongue clicks?

Last week, I dialed Mike Hunt. My boss claimed to have never heard that old joke.

It could be worse: The guy in the cubicle next to me had to call Ms. Bitchass Assbitch. That would have been a fun conversation: "Well hello, Ms. Assbitch. How are you today?"

Personally, I'd prefer dancing to this lost Motown nugget: Kim Weston, "Take Me In Your Arms (Rock Me A Little While)." It's both a dancefloor throbber and a tale of pure ache, and it'll be part of Saturday's "BOSS RADIO NAPALM" birthday celebration. Can your heart stand it?