... time to break New Year's Resolutions and marvel at the CJLO yearly staff picks!! Check out my favorite albums of the year, as well as those of the rest of my CJLO kin here: http://www.cjlo.com/magazine/features.php?ID=211, and don't forget to speak your piece in the CJLO crypt... I mean, on the CJLO message board!

alright, a quick recap for all of you that have been concerned about my erratic behaviour as of late.

i had high hopes for october of this year... eight is a lovely number that's always served me well, and i was expecting the "eight" month of the "eight" year (yeah, i still run on the roman calendar, you got a problem with that?) to have a special resonance.

it kinda did, and it kinda didn't. i had lots of fun folks come up and visit (a trend that i hope will continue in the latter part of the year), i travelled down to the us for cmj 08 (always a pleasure), and i won second place at a costume contest i didn't know was taking place (more on that later) - all delightful. 

i also felt a lot of pressure from a lot of strange and unpleasant sources, and spent most of the month running like a rat on a wheel, which is why i have been extremely antisocial and mostly inaccessible. after spending the first few days of november steamrolled by flu, i finally feel like i'm starting to shake off whatever the fuck october was and normal life is coming back into view.

this week looks to be fun fun fun. bison b.c. and barn burner on monday, nine inch nails on wednesday, and eagles of death metal on friday will provide the soundtrack. wanna come out and play? send me a line.

now, re: the costumes, as pictured in my default (for now). i got a lot of questions from people about the outfits, so here, once and for all, are the answers:

yes, both are entirely homemade, with the exception of my wig, and my boots. julia's is entirely homesewn, mine is a combination of cardboard and window insulation. yes, i sewed the sequins on the leggings myself. yes, we both did our own makeup. if doubt on any of these points is what cost us first place, well... i can live with that, 'cause after all, we lost to a giant chicken.

and now, an anecdote... while walking along, we were heckled by a group of fratty dudes. one of them yelled "paul stanley sucks!", to which i replied "that's true - that's why neither of us is dressed like him." then all his friends razzed him for getting burned. it was fun. as to where peter criss was that night? no one wants to be peter criss. not even peter criss.

you wanted the best... you got the best! goodnight!

some candy photos, "patriotic" and otherwise, taken at the green dragon flea market in ephrata, pa in may.

After 7 years and 9 months... you can listen to BVST this coming Wednesday from 7 to 9 pm EST on 1690 AM!

Think you're outta range? You'd be surprised... From the CJLO AM blog:

Our initial estimates on the broadcast radius of CJLO was 30 kilometers in the day*, centered at the middle of the island in eastern Lachine. It's far enough to reach all of Laval, Longueuil, as well as from St-Anne's to Riviere des Prairies. The estimate was more than enough for our needs.

* (Quick note: AM radio waves go further at night, since the sun's rays interfere with them. When the sun's down (or on a VERY overcast day) the AM waves can travel further. Thus, the best time to listen to CJLO from anywhere is a cloudy night in December. )

Then we turned the transmitter on. Almost right away, we began to receive reports of people hearing us in L'Assomption (40km away), on the route to Quebec City. Not long after that, one of our listeners (and forum members) confirmed he could hear us from Ottawa (150km) during the afternoon. I drove up to Huntington (55km south-west of Montreal) and heard our signal loud and clear on my car radio at the peak of the afternoon. Yesterday, our AM consultant heard from someone in Quebec City (230km) itself that they were able to hear us very clearly during the day.

It looks like we were grossly underestimating our broadcast radius by at least 100%, most likely considerably more. And that's just from your standard household / car radios.

Shortwave radio operators often have larger antennas and more powerful receivers than the average person. They're able to pick up radio stations from much further away. Not long after we turned the transmitter on, I received a report from a man in Gasport, New York (460km away) who picked us up on his shortwave rig. Our signal was quite strong there, and still clear enough for him to hear our music and test message. To put thing into perspective, Toronto is about 510km away from Montreal in roughly the same direction.

Now for the piece de resistance. Today I received an email from a gentleman that heard our signal from the furthest distance yet. He's also a shortwave operator with a larger antenna / receiver than the average person. He recorded a sample of what he received, which he sent along with his message. You can listen to it here. It's a little garbled, but if you listen closely, you can hear the French test message. You can also listen to the original message for a comparison.

How far away is this guy? New York (500km)? No. Further. Florida (~2000km)? Keep going. Vancouver (3800km?) Closer, but in the wrong direction. No, in fact, our signal made it all the way to Scotland! The town itself is Troon, located about 4800km away from Montreal. That's about 1/10th of the way around the planet!

What does this mean for you and I? Well, for starters, it means that almost anyone around Montreal will definitely be able to pick us up. Sadly, the downtown core does dampen the signal a bit, what with all the concrete and metal and what have you. Hell, even CJAD has trouble fully reaching downtown, and they have a 100,000 watt transmitter (we're running at 1000 watts). Suffice it to say, we're doing pretty well for ourselves.

Update: Since I posted that last message, I've received email from radio operators from East Yorkshire in the UK, from a few kilometers out of Helsinki, Finland, and from Sweden, 200km out of Stockholm. That's incredible. So far as local listeners go, with a good old standard AM radio, we've been heard as far as the Gaspésie.

watching sarah palin's speech at the rnc tonight sharply highlighted the rotten underbelly of the amuhrica i love so dearly... the other side of the "flag wavin', gun totin', mini-mall constructin', suburban sprawlin', fast food inventin', retail perfectin', what-would-jesus-doin' gung-ho, yeehaw earnestness", as i once put it.

here's a transcript of the halfway mark, when palin attacks obama's platform:

America needs more energy ... our opponent is against producing it.

Victory in Iraq is finally in sight ... he wants to forfeit.

Terrorist states are seeking nuclear weapons without delay ... he wants to meet them without preconditions.

Al Qaeda terrorists still plot to inflict catastrophic harm on America ... he's worried that someone won't read them their rights?

Government is too big ... he wants to grow it.

Congress spends too much ... he promises more.

Taxes are too high ... he wants to raise them.

the boldfaced line in particular nauseated me. met by a standing ovation, it reminded me that the flipside of that unrepentant yeehaw earnestness i so admire is simply pervasive blinding jingoism.

the fact that most republicans in particular, and many americans in general view the rule of law as some kind of commie pinko policy that's threatening the very fabric of american freedom doesn't just boggle my mind, it turns my stomach. not two minutes later, palin was referencing the "fear and pain and squalor of a six-by-four cell in Hanoi" in which john mccain was held and tortured over five and a half years. you'd think that one would contradict the other, no? after all, it was the violation of the rule of law that allowed for mccain's unlawful imprisonment and treatment in vietnam, right? she goes on to recount:

As the story is told, "When McCain shuffled back from torturous interrogations, he would turn toward Moe's door and flash a grin and thumbs up" - as if to say, "We're going to pull through this."

the moral of all this? it's not so much that mccain's torturers were wrong... or that torture, or imprisonment without due process is wrong. it's that mccain was right in taking it like a man. if he could pull through it, then why should some random brown people that want to "inflict catastrophic harm on America" expect anything different? they should cowboy up, 'cause what's good for the goose is good for the gander, right?

and that, ultimately, is what makes the united states such a weak society. the fact that while most americans can't stop congratulating each other on living in the supposedly most powerful and prosperous nation on earth, while simultaneously aspiring to not only be no better than, but to stoop to the lowest levels of animal interaction will be its ultimate downfall. comparisons of the united states to the roman empire aren't novel by any means, but it's important to not forget that while the roman empire contributed countless great achievements in human ingenuity, it too collapsed upon itself in decadence and ruthlessness. societies in which retribution is tantamount, and notions of truth and justice and elevating the human condition are secondary, are doomed to fail.

no shit they think obama is elitist. the fact that he seems to want to remind americans that living in collective society doesn't necessarily mean having to scrabble over scraps in the dirt like dogs is clearly antithetical to the rootin'-tootin'-gun-totin'-ted-nugin'-dog-eat-doggin' philosophy that is so en vogue in the republican camp. frankly, i believe that much of obama's platform consists on blowing hot, hopeful air up america's collective ass; that said, i much prefer his brand of aspirational politicking over the lowest-common-denominator democracy that the republicans bring to the table. 

after all, the republicans have been steadily attacking the one thing that makes america great... the one thing that might make all the flag waving worthwhile: the american dream. nowhere else is the idea that every man, no matter what his birth or circumstance, can aspire and achieve greatness more consistently preached... and nowhere has it been more denigrated. obama IS the american dream, and in the republican eye, that makes him elitist. so they offer sarah palin.

palin is solidly american. she has succeeded, but within reason. she shoots guns, loves jesus, and makes babies. she lives in the hinterlands, rough and tumble country, where she rides snowmobiles. she's mrs. jane q. public, wondering like you and me, "what is it exactly that the V.P. does every day?". sarah palin is not aspirational. she is the embodiment of middle america, and she is the new american dream, as envisioned by right-wing america.

the new american dream isn't one of betterment. it isn't one of culture, of exposure to new ideas, of aspiring to go beyond what is readily available. the new american dream is embracing homogeneity, and knowing your place, and seeking to be no better and no different from your neighbor. the new american dream isn't fighting back, or resisting, or working to eliminate injustice, violence, grief, pain. the republicans want you to believe that the new american dream is like john mccain, flashing a thumbs up as he's led from the torture chamber to the cell. the new american dream is just being okay, just pulling through, soldiering on and taking it on the chin no matter what your circumstance.

so, dear americans, i know a lot of you have become disillusioned with the real american dream, mostly because it has become almost impossible to achieve. so impossible, in fact, that you've been led to believe it's a lie. but this new american dream they're trying to sell you comes too easily... don't believe it. it is the nightmare of mediocrity shrouded in clouds. if you want the real deal, you have to fight for it, and not in countries halfway around the world. every day you gotta fight to be a little bit better, a little bit smarter, a little bit sharper. that's my american dream... and i'm living it - some bland, but functional, canadian version of it.
 

last night's fantasia film festival presentations in the hall building dealt with similar themes, but couldn't be more different.

stuck - i really was not feeling this movie AT ALL. while i love stephen rea, and the story lured me in very effectively, i became increasingly pissed off over the course of the film. based on a true story, i couldn't suspend disbelief and get over how fucking morally reprehensible the main character was in order to join the audience in the cheap laughs at the over the top racial caricatures. frankly, i think this is going to tank when it goes wide. also, i don't care what everyone else thinks - mena suvari is a hideous lightbulbhead and i've loathed every film she's been in (except slums of beverly hills, and that's only because i forgot she was in it).

red - interestingly, this film neatly bookended stuck, continuing the theme of personal responsibility and revenge. unlike stuck, i couldn't have loved this film more. as johnny mentioned, this is the third movie that i've seen at fantasia based on a jack ketchum story, and so far i've been batting 1000, which is convincing me that i should get to my local library and get reading. that said, this is a beautiful, slowly paced film that lures you in and then holds you tightly. every dog has it's day, the film implies, and this was a perfect end to mine.

wanna win some free passes to the festival? send an e-mail to contest@cjlo.com with your name, phone number, and the name of your favourite CJLO / Fantasia DJ... and in case you're having trouble with that last question... that would be me, angelica.

a.k.a. the main reason why i'm behind on life right now.

reprinted from the cjlo forums for your reading (dis)pleasure, my rundown of the films i've seen thus far:

Truffe - Made in Quebec with a lot of high profile players, this was a nicely shot, subtle and relatively lightweight parable for our modern day. A creature feature on the surface, the underlying tale is ultimately one of greed and market manipulation, and brought to mind the largely fabricated shortage and subsequent inflation in the gas and food market. I enjoyed it, and it'll do well.

Rec - Speaking of manipulation, this film is a masterful exercise in how to hold an audience in the palm of your hand. Certainly not a "deep" film, Rec leaves no lasting effects, but it's a highly effective thrill ride nonetheless and I highly recommend it.

Batman: Gotham Knight - I am not adequately equipped to judge this film, being that I a) don't care about comics in general or Batman in particular, b) find the aesthetics of anime to be ugly in general, c) get pissed off by bad dialogue and/or nonsensical plotlines, and d) do not have a penis. I'm sure the fanboys have a lot to say about this, but it made me fall asleep.

Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer - This Canadian production is a nice throwback to classic monster films, and features an extremely enjoyable performance by Robert Englund of Nightmare on Elm Street fame. Lot of monsters, lots of slaying, and its fair share of laughs, this is good popcorn
horror film.

Second Skin - As someone who enjoys videogames, I don't believe that they're to blame for the whole host of antisocial behaviours that have been attributed to them - by the same token, games, particularly those that rely on weekly subscriptions, do employ a series of tactics that prey on people's synapses and escapist tendencies, and can be as ruinous to the weak and unmotivated as any substance abuse. This is a good cautionary tale, despite being meandering and repetitive at times.

Let The Right One In - A beautifully shot and delicately understated coming of age story between a bullied young boy and the little girl/bloodsucking vampire he befriends. This film dances deftly between bloodiness and beauty and has a really charming pace and unique look. One of my festival favorites thus far.

What We Do Is Secret - I've been waiting for this film for a long time, being that I enjoy both The Germs and Shane West, but I was aware of the potential for disaster that a meeting of these two could create. That said, the film is enjoyable enough, and a good primer on the band, but in my mind doesn't capture enough of the grit or nihilism that the Germs embodied.

Idiots and Angels - A brilliant full length animation, this film couldn't possibly have a more unique vision or style. Full of breathtaking images and clever ideas, this film grabbed me right from the start and swept me along clear to the end. Another festival favorite.

The Objective - As frightening and pointless as the conflicts in Afghanistan and Iraq, this film hammers home how intangible the enemy is, and how meaningless the deaths are. Well shot and engaging, I came away from it feeling lukewarm despite wanting to feel much more intensely captured by it. Conceptually, this movie is great, however the execution misses the mark somewhat.

Small Gauge Trauma - This yearly favorite collects some of the edgiest short film submissions, and once again didn't disappoint, despite (or because of?) the seemingly endless amounts of genital mutilation. Standouts include Electric Fence and I Love Sarah Jane.

Home Movie - I highly enjoyed this nifty piece of celluloid birth control, featuring a set of beastly twins who gradually unravel their family and the audience's nerves. Shot in first person perspective through the family's handycam, this film is as manipulative as Rec but leaves a much stronger impression and opens the door for some interesting philosophical discussions.

Bound for Pleasure / Transfigured Nights - This documentary double feature delves into the world of paraphilias. Bound for Pleasure is a traditional documentary that explores the world of dungeons and dominatrixes, and people that frequent them. Be aware, this documentary is so fucking full unflinching shots of nipple and cock and ball torture that you will leave the theatre feeling like you owe 300$ to the theatre manager and a lengthy apology to your girlfriend.

Transfigured Nights is a collection of webcam footage of all-male... yeah, fuck it, I'm gonna say it, FREAKS from around the globe. Look, I get that we live in a world of moral and cultural relativism and all, and that by expressing an oh-so-evil judgement I'm clearly identifying myself as a vanilla, mainstream, bible-beatin' prude, but come on, people... getting yr rocks off by wearing a goddamn BURQA or dressing up like a fucking anime character or putting layers and layers of masks on, or JEEZUS layers and layers of PLASTIC BAGS on yr head and then TYING THEM OFF WITH A RUBBER BAND is not okay, okay? It's disrespectful, juvenile, creepy and just plain dangerous, respectively.

Additionally, both films are an excellent reminder that though we are in 2008, a large percentage of the male population still cannot think of anything more degrading and therefore sexually exciting than dressing up like a woman and doing household chores. Many of the men in these films, though particularly in Transfigured Nights, embody elaborate parodies of women for sexual thrills, which as a woman I found to be extremely unsympathetic. In any case, I'm gonna stop now, before I get into the hard socioeconomic realities of the lifestyles portrayed in these films.

you know what? as a day, you've always worked out pretty well for me.

thanks for that.

some realizations: it occured to me today that at the age of 26 i am exactly what my 16 year old self wished to be. it took ten fucking years to get there, but they say that the best things in life are worth waiting for, and perhaps they're right after all... 

also, maybe i've been watching waaaay too much oprah, but maybe, just maybe, positive thinking DOES work. i have a lot less hate to give these days. i guess i'm trying to take everyone else's poor choices with a grain of salt... after all, i'm just as stupid as the rest of you - and while it's hard to accept that while equally stupid, we're not equally conscious of our own stupidity, i am doing my best to come to grips with the fact that that consciousness may be imparted by good will, but never by force.

which is to say, raging against people's idiocy brings them no further along the path of understanding their own idiocy... but perhaps one can lead by example by keeping an open heart and mind.

good god. that's kinda peace and love, isn't it?

forgive this patchouli scented post. i think it's a by product of all the vitamin d i've been taking. seriously, check it out. it's made me at least 60% less stabby.

in any case, one last thank you to femme for their good times and hospitality tonight. it's always nice to check in with the kids to see what they're into... keeps you young, while reminding you how old you are.

and if there's one lesson to be learned from tonight, children, this is it: when the guy on stage offers to pour straight vodka into your begging mouth, for the love of all that is holy! close your eyes, or you too will be crying silently in the front row for the next five minutes. seriously kids, didn't yr parents teach you anything??

i'm quite proud of it.



more photos from my recent travels to come, if the mood strikes me.

..

uh, viewing party for one at my house, sometime in the near future.