What is this strange world that we have created?

Indeed we create it a little more every day with our words, additions and friends…

Who are all these people that thrive here?

All of us are here for our own reasons…

Some to entertain with stories

Others to seduce with words and phrases

Some come to teach

Other to enlighten in their own way

Some come with Sunshine in their Hearts

Others with love and joy to share

Some tells stories of intrigue

Other of foreign lands and ways

There are some that fit into all of these categories

Some that do not fit at all

And

Some that do not know where to land. 

We are all here for something...

We all take something with us…

But will we ever know what it all means?

Do we really need to know?

This Blog is in Memory

of

Bruce Edward Simmons, 41 Ridgewood, NJ

As I slowly gathered my research and worked on getting this blog ready I wrote and deleted over five different versions....you see I couldn't find a single one that I felt would do any justice to this man, his memory, or just the memory of that day. 

In the end I am doing what I do best when I can't find my own words, I am borrowing the words of others....I know this will not even begin to do justice to the life that was snuffed out that day or the lives of anyone affected but it is all I have and I offer it with all my heart.

Please forgive me.

A passage regarding his wife and his family and life:

After resisting the urge for five days to visit downtown New York where her husband, Bruce, was last seen before the World Trade Center collapsed, Kathy Simmons gathered her family by her side on Sunday and went into the city. "It was definitely horrible," she said. "But I wanted to be closer to where he was last." Bruce Simmons, 41, was a father of three and partner in the investment firm Sandler O'Neill. He was responsible for the firm's creation of its Chicago office several years ago and spent a lot of time there picking out the location and hiring many of its employees. A rabid Yankees fan, avid golfer, and his family's best cook, his wife said, Simmons also found time to coach his son's soccer team and serve on the board of directors for the Maroon Soccer Club. The Ridgewood, N.J., native was working on the 104th floor of the south tower when the first plane hit the north tower. "I'm going to be evacuated Kath. I'll call you when I get down to the street," he told his wife in his last call home after the first plane struck. "He was in charge of his equities desk. So he made sure everyone got out first," Kathy Simmons said. "As much as I miss him, I know he did everything right in the end."

Comments from people who had the honor of knowing him:

I knew him as Mr. Simmons. He was my soccer coach when it was my first year as a maroons player. He helped me to become a better player, and for that I thank him. My first game as a Maroons player, I scored because he told me what I should do. He was a really nice person and I am going to miss him. I was friends with his son Jack, and I knew it was hard on him after losing his father. I missed Bruce Simmons.

I was the second person to arrive at the food tent early in the morning of the Maroons soccer tournament. I asked the man working there if I could help. He handed me the keys to his Ford Expedition and asked me to go get the bagels and take some to BF and some to Vets field. When I returned and handed him his keys, he introduced himself as Bruce Simmons. We had never met. He didn't really know who I was when he let me have his car. He just needed a little help

As a boy growing up in Panther Valley some of my fondest memories were playing baseball,basketball, football or just hanging out with Bruce. The things that stands out the most was his gentle heart and great smile.

"A purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved" -Sirens of Titan

The definition of a HERO is a man of distinguished courage or ability, admired for his brave deeds and noble qualities....Bruce was just such a man, maybe not in the large ways that made the world sit up and take notice, but in the ways that matter, the people whose lives he touched and worked with know without a doubt that Bruce was and will always be a hero in their hearts and a true loss for the world.

And now my little commentary to try and make things a little more complete....

September 11th was and will always be a day of heartache, sorrow, loss and change, no one will ever be able to make that day different in our world, we cannot go back and erase it and make it better, but we can learn from it and move forward, with love, hope and understanding.

I don't think there is a single person in the world who doesn't remember what they were doing that day when the news broke.  I remember feeling like someone had ripped my heart out, I watched the news and listened to the radio with tears streaming down my face and a sick feeling in my heart.  So many lives, so many hearts, so much destruction...I suddenly felt so isolated and so changed. 

I know my feelings and thoughts are not noteworthy when you consider how many lives were directly effected, wives, husbands, sons, daughters, mothers, fathers....I can't even begin to imagine the pain and heartache in their lives still to this day.

An entire planet changed in the blink of an eye because of a few misguided souls....when you think about it, well it really is astounding.

I am going to leave you with a quote and a song....please take the time to read the quote a few times, it is profound and there is no other way to put it....I would love to hear your thoughts, what you were doing that day, even just how you feel when you think about it....Thank you

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it

- George Santayana

Shhhh....I am "stealing" computer time so to speak, I cannot promise I will be back before the middle of the week and I cannot promise that I can even think about commenting back to all of you if you decide to comment, but I just could not, not share this when my soul is full and needs to flow...

And sometimes life just changes...

Do you ever notice how something so simple can change your entire perspective on something?

A look, a smile, a gentle comment....nothing much but with so much power that the world stops for just an instant and then you are turning in a different fashion

Have you ever seen someone just "glow", not from the sun or from a bottle but an inner radiance that just makes you smile and giggle inside because you get to witness it...

But of course being human and witnessing it makes you realize how much you truly want whatever it is that is making that other person glow with such a beautiful radiance and warmth that no one around them cannot be affected. 

And then once you have that glow within you your perspective once again changes and suddenly you are so grateful and amazed by that glow that you want to make everyone around you glow too...

To be in the presence of something so great that words cannot even begin to describe it is amazing....

Happiness cannot be bought, life changing events are not the big ones, real amazement is only found in the little things and learning never stops...

Life is changing every minute, sometimes in order to change with it you need to go against it...and maybe, just maybe my tide is turning...

In the effort of continuing on my road to self discovery, self love and improving my self image I am going to try something different today....it was inspired by a lot of you that love me and are trying to help me improve my confidence and self esteem....

***Disclaimer: Please note this is not intended to say that anyone who is not like me is any less or not just as amazing as me....but I need to do this for me, not you so please dont take offense!!!***

Reasons why I love my Curves

1. Children -- Kids love my curves, the padding on my hips makes a nice comfy seat, as does my thighs (as a lap) and my ample chest provides nice pillows to rest their heads when they are tired or hurt.  I have never been turned down by a kid yet to be held and not once have they told me I'm not comfy (in fact I got that word from one of my kiddos I was a nanny to for a while he used to say I was the most comfy pillow he ever had).

2. Comments -- I don't think I have ever heard anyone yell out "Nice Flat Stomach"...I have, in fact, heard nice tits and nice ass....both of which I have in abundance.

3. Low cut shirts -- you just cant do a low cut shirt justice unless you have the breasts to make it look good, sorry it just makes your neck look really long otherwise.

4. Low cut shirt stares --  Ever seen a guy trip over his feet while staring at your chest?  I have, I have also managed to get through an entire job interview without my interviewer ever looking at my face (yep I got that job).  Plus it keeps people from looking at my face and eyes, since I am a little self-conscious....(just a little!)

5. Handles -- I often wonder after a particularly good round of fucking where men hold on to skinny women, the bones? Eww, um gross....my hips are comfortable and easy to hold onto as are my breasts, which makes things, um, harder and better for me, to put it bluntly.

6. Jeans -- I can fill out the ass in a pair of jeans...'nuff said

7. Thongs and G-strings -- what good are they if they don't have something to highlight?  I mean a string going down my back isnt gonna do it for you so why would one going down between flatness resembling an ass?

8. Spankings -- Ok so I have some fetishes, sue me who doesn't?  This is one of my big ones....I don't know if I could enjoy them as much if I didn't have as much padding or if I couldn't take as much as I can due to said padding.

9. Dancing -- If I shake my hips or ass you can see it...it doesn't take my whole body to make the move look good

Wow I got to 10!!!  I didn't think I could do it...so here we go...finally....

10.   Grinding -- both with and without clothesI have never heard that I am painful or hurt someone...in fact I have gotten some great ass comments from grinding

So there you go10 good comments about my curves...what do you think, did I do ok? 

I am gonna leave you with some more song lyrics for today...enjoy...(brownie points as always if you guess the song)

Only wish that you were here
You know I'm seeing it so clear
I've been afraid
To tell you how I really feel
Admit to some of those bad mistakes I've made

If you want it
Come and get it
Crying out loud
The love that I was
Giving you was
Never in doubt
Let go your heart
Let go your head
And feel it now

You walk into your office like every normal work day, nothing special, in fact if anything the traffic on the drive in has you rather tense and wishing to go home already. 

You sit down at your desk after hanging up your coat and pick up your phone to check your messages...right about half way through your first voice mail message from your boss you feel a soft touch along the back of your leg, slowly moving up your leg and moving around to the front of your thigh.  Surprised you almost drop the phone and pull back a little to look under your desk, you see me on my knees under your desk, I look up and you and put a finger to my lips "shhh". 

My hand starts to run up and down your inner thigh getting closer to your crotch with every stroke...slowly teasing you and making your cock get harder and harder with just the idea of my hand on you.  Finally, I run the tips of my fingers over the bulge in your pants, softly, teasingly, barely touching you.  At last my fingers wrap around your cock through the fabric of your pants, stroking you up and down, trying to make you as hard as you can possibly become.  I reach my other hand up and slowly pull down your zipper, reaching in and extracting your rigid cock from its restraints. 

You hear my sigh come from under the desk at the sight of your nice hard cock, I am not able to help myself as I lean forward and run my wet tongue up and down your cock, making your erection nice and lubricated. I wrap my hand around your cock and begin to pump up and down in rhythm, swirling my tongue over your head to taste the sweet drop of precum that has formed on your tip.  I place my lips over the head of your cock and start to gently suck at your head, trying to get more of your cum to taste.  I begin to work my mouth up and over your cock in time with my hand, moving more and more of your stiff member into my mouth until I move my hand away and am just moving up and down on your cock with my mouth.  At this point I hear a knock on your office door (which has been open this whole time while you were pretending to check your voice mails).  Your boss wants to talk with you for a minute, walks in and closes the door.  You reach under and place your hand on top of my head to still my movements, to which I move your hand away and begin to work you faster and faster with my mouth....I hear you trying to make a rational conversation with your boss regarding your recent project and feel your body trying to hold in its orgasm so as not to give away what I am doing under your desk.  Finally he walks out of your office and you ask him to close the door behind him, you have a few calls to make and dont want to be disturbed.  The minute the door closes I feel your cock swell in my mouth and your cum begins to shoot down my throat, releasing a sweet tasting string of goo into my mouth. 

I have seen a lot of "real" profiles, as some of them like to call themselves, writing about profiles like mine (which they love to call "fakes") and making rather broad assumptions about the kind of person I am and about my character in general, since I "am not honest about who I am". 

Me, personally, at first I just let it slide by, I stuck my fingers in my ears and started humming one of my favorite songs and pretended they weren't being so judgmental...I mean after the whole "Silver" incident who wouldn't be a little jaded right?

But now I am done.  Its just not right and its just not fair for those of you out there acting like that to make such a broad assumption about all of us who chose not to show our true faces on an every day basis.

Let me start with this is my MySpace dammit...I didn't invite you to it, (with a few choice exceptions that already knew and liked me ) and I didn't ask you to come in and look around.  Although I appreciate every person that visits myspace and who reads my blogs I never forced you to or asked you to, please don't act like I did. 

This is the one place in this world where I have truly been accepted for just being me, for saying whatever I want, think and feel.  I can truly just "be" and for once really find some support and happiness....  My life isn't perfect and my family and "real life" friends aren't either, if they were to read most of this or even know most of this stuff about me they wouldn't even talk to me anymore, (believe me I have tested them on occasion and its scary how fast I would become ousted).  This is my created world or "bubble" if you prefer where I can just let it all flow out.

I have made countless friends and acquaintances that have given me the support and encouragement that I need every day that I am not getting elsewhere.  Call me pathetic, call it whatever you like, but realize that it makes me happy and that was the point in the first place...

I am not writing any of this, nor did I post my profile, to deceive anyone or to make anyone think I am not who I say I am, more to the point this profile is more true then anything I could post of the so-called "real life" me. 

So call me whatever you like, but realize that this isn't about you and therefore you really shouldn't be judging people left and right.  I love and truly care for every person that I have really come to know since I have put up these blogs, I have several new friends that care about me just the way I am, funny enough they respected my right to be a little anonymous, and they cared about me without having to see a picture or know anything more about my life then I chose to share. 

They take me at face value, what I say is what I mean, and that is 100% true. 

So there is my little silly rant for the weekend, I hope it makes at least one person reconsider us "fake" profiles...have a great rest of your weekend everyone.

Do you know one thing that has always perplexed me? 

People (girls especially) who get all upset over what they consider derogatory or condescending nicknames that they get called...me personally I take them for the compliment they are. 

(I am so tired of the idea of PC this and PC that...everything is what it fucking is...deal and move on.) 

So anyway here are just a few that I get called that I absolutely love:

Baby - damn, depending on who says this it can sound like one of the sexiest compliments in the world

Honey - who wouldn't want to be considered something so sweet that I just want to drip over certain peoples bodies to lick off...ooops getting off track again...lol

Sweetie - again cute and sweet

Sexy - Hell, pretty self explanatory, I think

Cunt - depending on who is calling me this it can go both ways, its almost borderline

Bitch - I love this one...esp. when it comes from another girl...it means i have done my job for the day (the male version being prick)

Witch - I consider this just a slightly lower extension of the word above

Toots - This one is kinda an old favorite for me, my grandfather's friends used to call me this when I would get them drinks during their poker games

Trick - I personally think that if you can be good enough to work at it you must be quite good...lol

Hoe - Not my favorite, but hell if you think of it like a gardening tool at least you are useful

And my personal current favorite:

My Slut - notice it has the "my" in front of it? lol...sorry inside joke...but hell the word without the "my" in front of it is pretty nice too...

Any ones I am forgetting ladies?

P.S. Yes one of  Xanthan's previous blogs did give me some ideas for this one so please go pimp him out and vote as he requests....lol, lord knows i didn't!!!! (sorry hon, just couldn't do it, i like ya to much )

Ladies and Gentleman...

I came across a blog today that I just happened to read thanks to spending so much time on Xanthan's blog and reading comments and it was one of the most amazing fiction short stories I have come across on my short time on Myspace....I sincerely suggest you bother clicking the link below and reading the story...

The Interlude: A Shameless Love Story

There is a line in the story that really hits home for me, and only the people who have been reading my blogs and emailing back and forth with me (basically my newest friends) will personally understand why this hit so close to home, but I really wanted to share it with them...

"She was too afraid of the future to look very far ahead. She had been living a lie for so long and he had given her a wonderful gift, the courage to face the truth. Finally."

P.S. I haven't made any decisions I am still very much in a holding pattern but so much more to think about every day...love you all!!!

I have noticed a lot of people posting blogs today that make me think...which is never a good thing...and something someone posted this morning made me think about a question my philosophy teacher in college asked on the first day of class (with the understanding that our final was going to be to give an answer to this question):

If you could choose to have the perfect happiness, the perfect mood, the perfect feeling, (basically the big warm fuzzy permanently), with no pain, guilt, sorrow or remorse, would you choose to end your life tomorrow to get it?

I don't even remember my answer at the time, I am pretty sure I said I wouldn't take it since I felt I hadn't lived, I just remember I passed the class and his comment to me on my answer was: "Rethink this in a few years and then answer again".

Sadly, thinking about this question so far today I think my answer might actually be different.  No sorrow, no remorse, constant happiness...no pain...it sounds like perfection to me.  I wouldn't have to preform for anyone like a puppet on the stage of life, I wouldn't have to try and fit any molds, it would be mine, I would finally only have me and my happiness to worry about. 

It hit me earlier today that one of my biggest obstacles in my own happiness is the fact that I put everyone else's needs and wants and happiness period in front of my own.  By the time I get to me I am to exhausted to even consider my own. 

Funny enough I realized that none of us ever asked him for his answer...I wonder what it really was?

Out at the bar with friends, sitting there trying to have a good time, but with the mood I have been in all week I was really not enjoying myself...that is when she walked over and offered to buy me a drink.  We both got a good laugh when I said, "I'm drinking coke, but I would love to buy you one", and then she informed me that she wasn't drinking either!   She was beautiful, long dark hair, big brown eyes and the perfect girl next door smile, I wanted to kiss her from the moment she walked up.

We sat at the bar and talked for a while, it was almost like we were two old friends just catching up.  Finally, she asked me to dance... and not to a slow song either, Nine Inch Nails, Closer comes on and that is when she wants to dance.  I love dancing with other females and this song just gave me the perfect opportunity to dance with her how I wanted.  We were both taking a lot of liberties and giving everyone at the bar a damn good show...her with her breast pressed up against my back, her hips grinding my ass, and then her hands rubbing over my breasts and arms, just swaying and moving to the music...in my opinion it was the perfect first dance...

At this point last call had arrived and my friends were departing, I looked at her and both of us just weren't ready for the night to end, she invited me over to her place for some "coffee", I knew there was no need for coffee, I don't even drink coffee, and I also knew it would have been better to say no and just get her number, but somehow I found myself saying yes...

Her apartment was only a few blocks away so we walked, holding hands, over to her place.  It felt really right and we didn't say a word the entire time just kept smiling...I swear I felt like I had the biggest shit eating grin on my face...

When we walked in the door the thought of coffee was long gone, she walked in first and I closed the door behind me, she quickly turned and pressed me up against the door, kissing me deep and hard...her tongue exploring my mouth, giving me full access to hers.  Finally I was getting to kiss that beautiful mouth of hers and I wasn't being disappointed.  Her lips were soft and felt absolutely amazing, she tasted like cotton candy and all sorts of other sweet stuff...  My hands must have had a mind of their own because they were on her ass, pushing her body further into mine, I wanted all of her and I wanted it pressed up against me right then and there.  She broke off the kiss with a giggle and said "I have been wanting to do that all evening"...she took my hand and lead me through the apartment into her bedroom...I couldn't tell you much about the bedroom other than the fact that it had a bed, I couldn't stop watching her move, her body was like every porn star, playboy playmate and cheerleader all rolled into one...She had a natural fluid grace that dancers spent years of training to obtain...but on her you just knew it was real...

She turned on the light and walked over to me, kissing me again, her hands roaming up and over my shirt and then down again to remove my shirt up and over my head, followed quickly by my bra...her hands were immediately caressing my breasts...her thumbs rubbing over my nipples making them harder and harder.  Her lips left mine to trail down my neck and over my shoulders to meet her hands at my breasts, she kissed all around my breasts licking and nipping at every inch of them before she ever came to my nipple, once she pulled my hard peak into her perfect little mouth I couldn't help moaning.  It was the most amazing feeling....as much as men love breasts they will never be able to compare when it comes to worshiping them correctly as only another woman can...

Three day weekend!  Woo-hoo, time to hide the make up, get out my comfy cloths, start a new book, and get on the road to a weekend away...and I won't be anywhere remotley near a computer after 5:30pm my time today if all goes well!!! 

Wish me no flats, no rain, and warm lake water!! (oh and no myspace withdrawls!)

This is gonna be a hodge podge of things going through my head, not a sex involved blog, please forgive me and bear with me....

What I want....

I want to be seen for the person I truly am, not the shape of my body or the size of my breasts

I want to be loved for who I really am, not who I made myself become to please you

I want to be truly accepted by people so I don't have to hide who I am just to be me

I want to be happy, I am not asking for a million dollars, anything big and fancy or anything else, I just want to be happy

I want to go to sleep every night in someone's arm and feel safe and warm and like I am home

I want to be able to walk around barefoot and not have people make comments

I want to be able to wear whatever I want and not be judged

I want to be able to put my hair up, have no makeup on, wear comfy clothes and have someone tell me I am beautiful

I want to truly love someone so much that they make me cry

I want someone to truly make love to me and worship me, allowing me to do the same in return

I want to be able to be near water (my true source of comfort) every day and be able to put my feet in whenever I want

I want to have picnics and spend summer days doing silly stuff like watching clouds for shapes and flying kites and not have someone put me down for being simple

I want to live somewhere where people are nice and truly care about you

I want to have children around me all the time, even if they are never my own

I want someone to dance with, esp. slow dancing when a song comes on the radio that I love

I want sunday dinners and family time, that doesn't include a tv or video game

I want someone to hold my hand and watch the sun rise and set, and not complain for having to get up to early or having something else to do

I want people to hear what I say to them and realize that I love them and I mean every word I say

I want someone in my life who will touch me just because they are passing me and want that comfort as much as I do

I want to be swept off my feet....

Gosh, I sound so selfish right now I want everything and more, but this is what my heart is telling me (when I bother to listen), why can't I just listen to it more often, why can't I just find these things....

Sorry for gushing, thanks for reading, if you did...

I was laying out by the pool, I had finished swimming and now wanted to feel the warmth of the sun on my skin.  I looked around and saw no one, the high fence should take care of anyone that would see anyway...I decided that I wanted to feel the sun everywhere and removed both pieces of my swimsuit.

I laid a towel down on the lounge chair and then laid myself down stretching out and enjoying the feel of the sun on my body...I must have fallen asleep and came awake at a sudden noise nearby...someone was on the other side of the fence and they were watching me sleep.  I know I should have immediately covered myself with the towel  and gone inside, but for some reason I was very turned on at the thought of being watched...

I began to run my hands slowly up and down my upper body, beginning with my shoulders, skimming my breasts and gently rubbing my stomach and upper hips...I then grabbed the sun lotion I had used earlier and began to slowly apply it to each of my breasts, on at a time.  Taking time to play with each nipple rubbing and pinching them until they were hard as rocks.  I let my hand continue down my body, rubbing lotion over my stomach, my hips, and finally brining up each leg one at a time to rub lotion over it...spreading my legs as I did so and giving my watcher a good view of my wet cunt. 

Once I was sure that I was good and rubbed down with lotion I put the bottle to the side and began to slowly run my hand down my body and in between my legs...I opened my legs wide and ran my fingers gently over my swollen lips, then again a little harder, making my pussy lips part and show my clit and wet cunt.  I brought my fingers back up to my mouth and gently sucked each finger in one at a time, making them each nice and wet.  Then I placed my hands between my legs again and began to play with my clit, gently rubbing slow circle around it, imagining it was my watcher's tongue. 

Finally, I reached down and inserted one finger into my dripping cunt, letting it slide right in and making sure my watcher got a good view of it sinking in to the knuckle.  I brought my other hand up to my mouth and began to wet each of those fingers in turn, finally bringing it down to play with my clit as I slowly inserted more fingers inside my cunt.  I could hear my watcher trying to be quiet while they were enjoying the view...their moans were soft but still very evident.  I decided it was time to finish my little show with a bang...I took the hand out of my cunt and started to wet my asshole with my own juices, once I was finally sure there was enough lube I pushed one of my fingers upside quickly and to the knuckle.  My back arching up off the lounge chair in pleasure I quickly inserted two more fingers into my ass and then began fucking my ass with my fingers as the other hand continued to play with my clit.  By this point I was already so aroused that it didn't take long for me to cum, it was loud and wet and I am sure every neighbor around could tell exactly how much I had been enjoying myself.

Once I had finally come back down from that blissful place that orgasm takes you to I wrapped the towel around me and made my way over to the fence where my watcher had been, he was gone, but he did leave me some evidence that he enjoyed my little show....I enjoyed that day so much that I have taken to sunbathing in the nude as often as possible...I am always hoping my watcher will come back and eventually join me....

As of late I have been trying to figure out that which is "me"...I used to think I had it all figured out, just goes to show that I was one of those stupid girls who thought they had the world...anyway this blog is about one of the few things I know about the ever elusive "me"...enjoy

The things that turn me on...

Intelligent Words -

yep, I think I wrote a previous blog all about this, but any person who can talk to me and recite to me the "big" words can basically turn me to mush...something that has proven to be a big problem for me when I take literature classes...(which may explain why I have had a few flings with college professors)

This also holds true for any man who has an accent and can recite a big word or two in my ear while in bed with me...nothing can make me cum faster...

Strength & Dominance -

Men are supposed to be strong and dominant.  They are supposed to take charge and take what they want, its in their genes and their jeans...lol.  Any man who knows what they want and goes for it can turn me on faster than any pretty face.  I want someone who doesn't ask for what I want but takes what they want, because any man like that will know how to please me without asking.

Believe me if you aren't doing something I like I will let you know, first by trying to distract you, then by a gentle nudge, then by moving you, and if that doesn't work I will simply tell you "Sweetie, this just doesn't do it for me, thanks but no thanks".

Men are the ones that have to thrust during sex (don't you just love that word thrust?...mmm that is a good one for a small word) they are meant to be in control....

Accents -

I almost hate to admit I fall into this stereotype category but I love men with accents...my favorite are Southern and British...something about either of those two accents, esp. when they whisper...wow I get all wet and ready just from sound of it....

This one has gotten me into trouble from time to time, since I went to college in the south (Mmmm, yummy art history teacher) and then add the fact that I had a British World Lit teacher...wow, needless to say I had to tape every class for both learning value (to many fantasies in class!) and for the use in taking care of myself later....

Thunder Storms -

I love the passion and the heat of a good thunderstorm, the more violent the better.  The sound of the wind, the rolling of the clouds, the boom of the thunder, the cracking of the lightning, and then add the cleansing sound of the rain...its almost like the sky is making love to the earth...

One of my favorite sexual memories is of being in a park, a sudden storm moving in, being soaked and falling down while trying to run for the car, pulling him on top of me when he tried to help me up...the rest, well thats for another story...

A Great Ass-

Shallow as it is I am an ass girl, its not a requirement, in fact one of my favorites in bed had no ass, but its still nice to have a great ass to sink my nails into and feel the muscles pumping beneath my fingers as he rams his cock into me....(this is also nice on a woman, something about a nice ass on a woman can make me want to kiss every part of it.)

Fantastic Conversation -

A long time ago I learned that I am better at talking with guys and hanging out with them in general.  I loved it when I would get so wrapped up in a conversation that I completely lost track of time, it always made me want to jump them at the end, simple but true...lol

Alright, so there are a few of the things that really turn me on and get me all nice and hot and wet...hope you enjoyed.

Another fantasy of mine, its a strange one coming from me, but sometimes you just have needs, unfortunately I cannot tell you the last time this one was met, but hey at least I have my fantasies....enjoy

That night started out a little rocky, he was running late and we missed our dinner reservations, but in the effort of giving him a chance I agreed to still go on the date, just to a different restaurant.  Once we got to the local restaurant and had placed our order we began to talk, that is when the night turned around completely, the conversation lasted all through dinner and after, he was amazing, smart, funny and listened as well as commented.  I felt like I had known him all my life by the time we left the restaurant.  We decided to go back to my place to continue the conversation, we were sitting on the couch in the living room talking when the perfect moment happened and he kissed me, it was a perfect kiss, soft, but strong, open and deep.  I swear the kiss lasted forever, we just couldn't seem to get enough of each other's mouths.  The kissing evolved into touching, a lot of touching, I don't know how but I ended up on my back on the couch with him on top of me, both of us still clothed but our hands running up and down making us wish there were no clothes for impediments.

"I want you so bad right now", I couldn't believe I had just let those words slip out of my mouth, this was only our first date I couldn't believe I had let it get this far, but I really didn't want it to end.  He looked down at me and smiled, "I want you too, are you sure?".  I couldn't help myself I just smiled and nodded, he stood up quickly and picked me up off the couch.  "Which way to your bedroom?" he whispered to me, I don't remember what I uttered but I must have pointed him in the right direction because he started moving in the direction of my bedroom. 

He carried me into the bedroom and gently laid me down on the bed, following me down and laying next to me.  We started kissing again and I couldn't wait any longer to feel his skin, I reached down and pulled his shirt off over his head, running my hands down his chest, I couldn't help myself, I wanted to taste his skin so badly that I began to follow my hands with my mouth, kissing and licking every inch of his skin that I could, twirling my tongue around his tight little nipples and following the line on his stomach to the buckle of his pants...I reached my hands to undo his pants but he grabbed my hands and pulled me back up to him, he kissed me and then removed my shirt and bra, following my lead to kiss and lick my skin in a path following his hands.  He spent extra time on each of my breasts, not just kissing and sucking on the nipple but lavishing every inch of my breasts with attention, by the time he worked his way down to my belly button I was sure I was on fire, I tried to speed him up making little sounds of protest and moving against him, but he wouldn't let me.  I finally removed my pants, but not my panties, he touched, kissed and ran his tongue over every inch of my skin, places I would never think of as sexual suddenly became extensions of my sexual organs...the backs of my knees, my hip, the inside of my thigh, all had me whimpering and arching against him. 

He moved away from me and removed his pants, but not his boxers, then he laid back down with me, directly on top of me, he began kissing me again, deep kisses that made my breath catch and my body get even wetter.  He parted my legs and moved his body against mine, I could feel his stiff cock through both of our underwear and I couldn't help rubbing my body against it, I wanted every inch of our bodies against each other, if I could have crawled into his body I would have....  I began to beg him between kissed, I needed him inside me, I had to feel his body completely against mine, I was going to explode....if he wouldn't stop kissing me and touching me and he wouldn't allow me to remove the last two pieces of clothing, I didn't know how much longer I could take the pain/pleasure that was overtaking my body with every caress and rub. 

When it got to the point that I couldn't take anymore  he moved and quickly removed both of our underwear before I even realized that he had moved.  I suddenly felt his hard cock at the entrance to my body, he began to slowly rub it against the outside of my lips, opening them and slowly rubbing his head against my hard clit...teasing me with it, using his arms to keep my body trapped away from his so that no matter how hard I was trying I couldn't move his cock into me.  He looked at me with a smile and said "Are you sure your are ready for me...hmm we should probably make sure..." with that he moved his hand down between my legs and began to slowly insert one then two more fingers inside of me, I gasped, and he continued working up a slow rhythm with his fingers, opening me up just a little and making sure I was nice and wet.  I cried out when he ran his thumb over my clit and that was all he needed to hear...he removed his hand and quickly guided his cock to my opening.  He looked directly into my eyes and then he thrust into me, nice and hard and deep, one quick motion was all it took to make me cry out as I came all over his nice hard cock. 

When my body was coming back down from the first orgasm he began to move inside of me, slowly building up another orgasm with a rhythm that was not to slow but not to fast, never going to deep but allowing me to feel just about all of him inside of me.  I couldn't think or speak all I could do was feel and move, I found the rhythm his body was making and mine joined his in a scene that felt as if it were meant to happen.  Once again I was on the edge of orgasm when I felt his cock growing inside of me, just as I began to orgasm I could feel his body stiffen and then release all of his cum inside of me...we laid there, locked together, just kissing for what seemed like forever...the rest of the night when on and on like that, I don't remember any sleep or breaks, it was the most perfect romantic sexual night...