in this sweet little void of mine, i feel depression coming slow, it comes and somehow i meet it half way, just to be left with a sense of betrayal, nothing...

everyday i try my best to wake up with hope, with my best shining in my eyes, but some things just don't come true, as if there was never any, no hope...

i have been told many lies by you all, and you still ask why, why i can not trust you, why i choose to by alone, by myself, left in the cold...

i feel my heart growing old, but my mind... to much knowledge to lift with my scabed thoughts, its way to much to hold...

please do not get my wrong, i have more then i could ask for, the love of my family, lessons that which i have learned, i have my heart, and this noise that i create with the little hope...

but after awhile i start to think...is there something missing, what comes after this all...

all i see is dark,

an alone winter to come,

a broken vase against the mirror of my face...

Nothing...

a deep pressure sooths me...

i hate the sun,

but the water falling on my face are calm...

it makes me feel whole....

the cold makes me shiver...

but i know when it hits...

i will be at home...

it is so sweet of you to join me,

after all you done,

caused between,

you and me...

it is so wonderful to see all your stupid little faces,

they are so pure,

so calm,

but i can see,

i can see everything...

you lied to me...

dress with your tiny, little, pretty hair,

confusing everything around your heart,

its ripped out aside,

tied down to your lies...

i will lift,

i will do this start,

poking around the surface of your brain,

caught down beside everything...

your are what i want,

you are what i need,

playing around in

caught in your desease...

you are what i tryed,

you are a cold lie,

playing around in filth,

brought down in love...

a drop of water in the endless sea....
it means so much to me...

a cut and bruise...
in my mind...
is that all you can do to me...

why must you hurt me...
why must we fight...
i thought you wanted me...
you said you needed this...

you lied...
you lied...

...Why Must We Fight...

you can keep on pretending to be happy,

but i actaully want to be there,

hold them,

then die away,

fading everything so joyfuly...

you think that your so happy,

but your lying,

deception is a cruel thing...

i do not want to be like you,

i never was

and never will be similiar,

you think that we think alike,

but im not the one who will give false hopes,

to those withering...

this time i am not going to go look for my love,

i will have it come to me...

and then everything,

everything will be as my dreams promised me...

do not face the sun,

it will burn your eyes...

two rivers join to form,

collide, or be one...

i will look at the sun,

to learn from what i can,

and the rivers will evaporate into one,

and play laugh, into the sky... all because our hateful sun

i wanted something new,

something to fancy over about,

you,

i needed something pure,

something to light the abyss,

lonelyness...

all i wanted was...

when i cry,

i want to hear you laugh,

when i smile,

it will be time to say good bye,

and when i die...

all will be happy again...