The Miserable Rich tour diary May/June 2009 Germany, Austria,
Holland and France
Day 1
Well, outside of the band a few strange things have been
happening – let’s just say people are not always what you think they are…
Rhys, James and myself had a lovely flight to Frankfurt and
a bit of a kerfuffle getting to Hazelwood central, but eventually got there to
meet up with Mike and Will to eat a lovely Thai meal.
Tonight we had the night off so we played Weetabix –
probably the best card game in the world – sponsored by a well-known breakfast
cereal which contains some wheat…
Day 2
I’ve been so excited about this tour I found it impossible
to read the last Sons of Noel and Adrian tour diary through sheer jealousy.
Note to self: jealousy is not healthy…
First gig of the tour was in Marburg supported by the lovely
Kenneth Minor (Hazelwood) now sporting guitarist and American Steve. Their
guitarist did some really cool stuff with slide, and pedals tremolo and volume.
Steve did some cool stuff playing bass and hi-hat simultaneously.
Pre-show we talked politix with Steve – general slating those
whacky tripped out politicians – if the current expenses “crisis” wasn’t so
laughable it’d probably turn me homicidal. We discussed the Hutton enquiry and
how the nation was bullshitted to on quite a big scale. Anyway enough small
talk…
The gig was lovely – really good for a first show of a tour
as opposed to the usual first night nerves syndrome. We stayed up at the hotel bar and the boys drew biro tattoos
on my arms of a wolf and a chicken, or something.
Day 3
Second show was in Dresden. I have to say I felt
ridiculously self-conscious on stage tonight and generally had my first night
nerves on the second night. Post-show Mike and me worked on our new cover –
Abba’s “I believe in Angels” with a twist of doing it in a Zorba the Greek
stylee starting slow and speeding up stupidly fast. Mike plays mandolin on it
which seems to add to the Greek-ness. More cards, beer and thankfully bed.
Day 4
Awoke from slightly traumatic dreams containing bits of
human flesh lying around everywhere – I must be a psychotherapist’s wet dream.
The drive to Nurenburg should’ve taken two hours but ended
up taking six due to a series of a RTAs (road traffic accidents). It was a joy
to arrive at Muz Club safe and with lots of games to play. I particularly like
this Velcro dart board with balls for darts – great! “Eric you require forty…”
etc.
We played this outside in the warm summer air and chatted to
some of the Great Bertollinis.
Tonight’s show was absolutely lovely and could not even be
tarnished by my shit-joke telling. I told my semi-legendary Simpsons joke to a
silent response. I tried to make up for it by saying “They loved that one in
Manchester…” James’ joke/story telling fared infinitely better – he’s good…he’s
very good.
It seems each time we come to Nurnburg things get a bit
silly, i.e. we get a leetle beet drunk and tonight was in no uncertain terms
the very same. We ended up in a bar were there was an open mic. I played for
about an hour – Like a Rolling a Stone, Another Brick in the Wall, I Believe in
Angels and many, many more. It was fun. A lovely night all round.
Day 5
Being somewhat hungover we drove the five-hour journey to,
oh, Vienna. It’s been so sunny and lovely on this tour. Last time we were in
Vienna it was snowing but now it’s super-hot – extremes in temperatures –
something to do with being far in-land or something.
Canada’s Caroline Keating was supporting tonight, playing
the lovely grand piano – she is a very talented singer/songwriter and when she
eventually records her debut album we’re all certain it will be amazing.
Before the show scanning Haus Der Musik’s concert programme
it described James as “Mastermind De Malplaquet”. However, it turns out when
translated the article was actually suggesting James’ specialist subject on
Mastermind would be, err, The Miserable Rich… Okay so that last sentence is a lie, but someone’s gotta
keep our impressionable egos in check here, right?
Tonight’s show was officially “sold-out” – ah, those magic
words. Lovely audience and a hugely enjoyable show. Great to see so many familiar faces.
We stayed up in the hotel with Caroline and friends, and a
metal band from Munich called Apron. Another late night, but being a
rock’n’roll hotel breakfast goes on till midday – woo-ho!
Day 6
After me nearly losing a video camera worth “quite a lot of
money” our lovely Austrian booker Tom took us round Vienna. We were all a bit jaded
but found a lovely elephant statue and just enjoyed being there.
So out of the city and on to the small town of Steyr at the
foot of some of Austria’s fabulous mountains. The venue was in one of those
commune type places – lovely and rustic, graffiti, wood, table football and
next to a beautiful greeny-blue coloured river – the water of which is so pure it’s
drinkable.
Amazing hospitality from our lovely hosts too – this place
was kinda heavenly. We were not expecting massive amounts from the show but it
turned out the audience were awesome – cries of “schön!” and “Yaaaahhhh!” after
each song made us feel great. When we were leaving the stage one local
gentlemen got up and gave us each a kiss. We did two encores in the end as the
crowd were so wonderfully persistent finishing with Golden Brown. T’was a magic
show indeed…
Post-show we shared our card game with some of our new
friends from Steyr but it turned out they knew the game anyway and showed us a
thing or two about how to play…
Day 7
Awaking at our lovely retreat I had a touch of fear since we’d
decided we’d go swimming in the river this morning. As beautiful as it looked,
rumours were the water was “quite cold”. Nervously we stripped down to our
shorts and tentatively took it in turns to enter the unknown. Well, I don’t
like to swear but “Fuuuuccckkkk!!!” is the only appropriate way to describe how
insanely cold it was. Once all in Carsten was to photograph us preferably
before we died of hypothermia. He told us to “stop shaking…” for the camera but
my survival instincts were just too strong - even for the sake of great art.
We hit the road for the five–hour journey to Dornbirn
through some of the most glorious scenery. In blazing sunshine we passed
beautiful lush green and snow-capped mountains – awesome and then some…
We played a lovely, big theatre type venue with a massive
stage and big sound. Again another lovely audience and a really good
performance - I think we’re getting quite good at being consistent - not to
blow our collective trumpet or anything. Some people we’d met last year in
Rorschach were there too – I think James confused them by over-complimentary
comments about their looks.
Backstage we were all getting a bit silly and decided to
make the “best sandwich in the world” causing great excitement all round – it
turned into a real Scooby-snack – enormous, but was quickly polished off.
At the hotel there were stuffed beavers or otters
ornamentally in reception. Now, it has to be said we like a pun or two, frankly
if it wasn’t for puns we’d have nothing – our lives would be an empty, vacuous,
desert of an existence...Every so often a pun comes along so good, so powerful
it blows our minds… So there are these otters or beavers in reception and Mike
from out of the skies plucks the words: “Yeah, but they don’t give a dam…”
Okay, so it’s not much but that’s all we got – keeps me
going anyway…
