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Wildtaco

Tim Schulze


Last Updated: 5/25/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Swinger
Age: 43
Sign: Pisces

City: st paul
State: Minnesota
Country: US
Signup Date: 12/11/2006

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Wednesday, May 09, 2007 

Bridge to Hawaii

A man riding his Harley was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one request.

The biker pulled over, thought about it and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."

The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources.

I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."

The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, "Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand women; I want to know how she feels  inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."

The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge???"


5:56 PM 
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Saturday, April 21, 2007 
Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman. Many females use a date rape drug on the market called "Beer".

The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large "kegs". Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them.

A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex.

Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women ! whom they would never normally be attracted

After drinking beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that "something bad" occurred.

At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as "a relationship."

In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "marriage." Men are much more susceptible to this scam after beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

 

Please! Forward this warning to every male you know.

 

If you fall victim to this "Beer" scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men.

 

For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the phone book.
3:10 PM 
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Thursday, February 01, 2007 

Current mood:  bitchy

1. WHAT CURSE WORD DO Y0U USE THE MOST?
Fuck.. if you don't like it fuck you, you fucking fuck.

2. DO YOU OWN AN IPOD?
No.. seems like every one else does. Radio is free..:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />


3. WHAT PERSON ON YOUR TOP 8 DO YOU TALK TO THE MOST?
Rogue and Chris

4. WHAT TIME IS Y0UR ALARM CLOCK SET TO?
don't use one

5. DO YOU WANT TO FALL IN LOVE?
all ready there

6. DO YOU WEAR FLIP-FLOPS WHEN IT'S COLD?
Only with socks to the garbage

7. WOULD Y0U RATHER TAKE THE PICTURE OR BE IN THE PICTURE?
Depends who's naked.  Me or them.

8. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Good movie. A night at the museum.

9. DO ANY OF YOUR FRIENDS HAVE CHILDREN?
A few.

10. HAS ANY0NE EVER CALLED YOU LAZY?
My wife..  He he he.

11. DO YOU EVER TAKE MEDICATION TO HELP YOU FALL ASLEEP?
yes, my wife.  Just kidding. Pills mann! They are the greatest

12. WHAT CD IS CURRENTLY IN YOUR CD PLAYER?
Ac/Dc thunder struck

13. DO YOU PREFER REGULAR OR CHOCOLATE MILK?
Reg.

14. HAS ANYONE TOLD YOU A SECRET THIS WEEK?
Yes. Can't tell you


15. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HAD STARBUCKS?
Never,. Carabiou much better

16. CAN YOU WHISTLE?
I tell my wife to. Sounds like a train.

17. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Hair..  Its got to bee clean and nice.

18. DO YOU THINK PEOPLE TALK ABOUT YOU BEHIND YOUR BACK?
Oh Hell yes.  Probaly not good either.. he he he.

19. DID YOU WATCH CARTOONS AS A CHILD?
yes and still do.. Sponge bob square pants.


20. WHAT MOVIE DO YOU KNOW EVERY LINE TO?
None.. can't remember yesterday

23. DO YOU OWN ANY BAND T-SHIRTS?
Not anymore.. But working on a 13th step  T.

24. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SALAD DRESSING?
ranch

25. IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOU?
I hope my wife.

26. DO YOU DO YOUR OWN DISHES?
yes. And everyone elses

27. LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
Right now..  this survey is to long..

28. ARE YOU ON A DESKTOP COMPUTER OR A LAP TOP?
Desktop

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY WANTING ANY PIERCINGS OR TATTOOS?
Tattoo's  tones of them…

30. WHATS THE WEATHER LIKE?
cold

31. WOULD YOU EVER DATE ANYONE COVERED IN TATTOOS?
yes. And I would hope they would get more.

32. WHAT DID YOU DO BEFORE THIS?
worked

33. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SLEPT ON THE COUCH?
2 weeks ago.

34. HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO YOU NEED TO FUNCTION?
3.5

35. DO YOU EAT BREAKFAST DAILY?
yes at about ..:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />noon

36. ARE YOUR DAYS FULL AND FAST PACED?
Always.. I have a 4 year old

37. DO YOU PAY ATTENTION TO THE CALORIES IN THE
PACKAGES?
yes

39. HOW OLD WILL Y0U BE TURNING ON Y0UR NEXT BIRTHDAY?
older than dirt. 41

40. ARE YOU PICKY ABOUT SPELLING AND GRAMMAR?
fuck no..

41. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO SIX FLAGS?
for a minute I thought it said  6 fags. Whew!!! NO! on either account.

43. DO YOU GET ALONG BETTER WITH THE SAME SEX OR THE OPPOSITE SEX?

Same. Girls are evil.

44. DO Y0U LIKE MUSTARD?
Honey mustard.

45. DO YOU SLEEP ON YOUR SIDE, STOMACH or BACK?
side and back

46. DO YOU WATCH THE NEWS?
no its depressing.
47. HOW DID YOU GET ONE OF YOUR SCARS?
axe.

48. WHO WAS THE LAST PERS0N TO MAKE YOU MAD?
Nicky

49. DO YOU LIKE ANYB0DY?
not most people.. but there are a few.

50. WHAT IS THE LAST THING YOU PURCHASED?
mt dew

8:16 AM 
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Saturday, January 27, 2007 
..> ..>
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Itchy Taco
Birthday: 6-66
Birthplace: Uranus
Current Location: St Paul
Eye Color: blue
Height: 5'8"
Right Handed or Left Handed: right, unless masterbating
Your Heritage: white
The Shoes You Wore Today: Wooden clogs
Your Weakness: Non itchy tacos
Your Perfect Pizza: Hot
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Don't use instant messenger.
Thoughts First Waking Up: Sex. with someone other than myself.
Your Bedtime: After a spent load.
Pepsi or Coke: Mt Dew.. Duh!!!!
MacDonalds or Burger King: They both suck. Jimmy johns
Single or Group Dates: orgeys
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Not a tea toaddler
Chocolate or Vanilla: Choc
Cappuccino or Coffee: Expresso
Do you Smoke: Only when theres no lube on the condom.
Do you Swear: Does a bear shit in the woods
Do you Sing: like a dying cat.
Do you Shower Daily: NO! keeps the customer away.
Have you Been in Love: Yes.. every time I look in the mirror.
Do you want to go to College: only for sex with freshmans
Do you want to get Married: already am..
Do you belive in yourself: Id better.
Do you get Motion Sickness: its a constant state of dellusion.
Do you think you are Attractive: I'm dead sexy.
Are you a Health Freak: I'd like to fuck a health freak
Do you get along with your Parents: Yes ones dead and others to far to fight with.
Do you like Thunderstorms: In other states.
Do you play an Instrument: I play with my instrument.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: They tell me I have.
In the past month have you Smoked: See above answer.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: I would have like to have been.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: yep. Rosey and her five sisters.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: I get all my hand lotion there.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: just a box. No oreo's
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: red snapper
In the past month have you been on Stage: The stage of life.
In the past month have you been Dumped: Yes. every night I get dumped unless I bring chocolate.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Yes, jail is getting lonley.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: The hearts of everyone who reads this.
Ever been Drunk: yes. Are you stupid.
Ever been called a Tease: No. Just a dumbass.
Ever been Beaten up: Just by my wife.
Ever Shoplifted: I'll never tell
How do you want to Die: Putting her legs over her head.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: 10 inches and extra thick.
What country would you most like to Visit: the one next to Uranas
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: green
Favourite Hair Color: black
Short or Long Hair: long
Height: 5"7 3/4
Weight: 150
Best Clothing Style: naked
Number of Drugs I have taken: Im on drugs who can remember.
Number of CDs I own: they don't fit in my 8 track.
Number of Piercings: above or below the waist.
Number of Tattoos: some.. but you can't see them.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: None. Lifes to short to look back.

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
2:44 AM 
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Sunday, January 14, 2007 

Category: Blogging

The Wild taco story..

Well its sort  of a goofey story.

Way back in the 90's me and anout 60 of my closet friends used tear up the town on our rockets.  After racing around we would stop up at hte local Taco Bell in Crystle and get a bite to eat.. At the time Taco bell was running a campaing for their wildtacos..  So were just hanging out about 60 of us and this Older couple walk up to me and Jeff Fuller and ask if we were a gang. We snickerd and pointed up the the sign that read.

" TACO BELL "

  The WildTacos

   Are HERE!!!

Yeah Were a gang we said we are the Wild Tacos.  and a nick name was born. its lame but true.

Schultzy out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2:46 AM 
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