some smell like baby shit
others smell like rotten eggs
once i farted and it smelt like an old hag
my friend farted and it smelt like a chip bag
watch out for those warm ones they
can kill a pen full of pigs
sometimes you have to check your pants to see if you left a stain
because that fart you just let out felt kinda watery o dang!
the random loud ones are what make people laugh
some sound like an atomic bomb blowing up the world
others sound like you just really have to shit
some farts can be silent but deadly
you walk up to someone to say hi and
you have to say goodbye right away
because you feel like your gonna cough up your lunch
sometimes it's something you ate
that opens the gates of yer anus

My mother was a hooker a drug addict a drinker My father came back to this broken home to find there was no liqour i sit inside my room and hide behind these thick think walls, they fight and fight all damn night until some body calls, nothing seems fare when it seems like no one cares their fighting hitting punching screaming and now they're throwing chairs.This isn't the life i thought i'd have and other days couldn't be so bad I know i will get through these days and i'll be living my life a different way but for now i'm going to have to face the fearful nights and a house full of hate.

You get arrested, what for?

You see, there was this man. I'll call him Johnny Jo. He was a devious character, that Johnny. A real poison to the human race. Johnny was responsible for some of the most notorious scams in history. Trains de-railed, banks robbed, trucks crashed and wiped clean of any evidence. But those are only the minor things. I decided it was time to stop Johnny Jo, before it became too late.



You see, I too was once in the biz. Some of my finest hours were spent scammin' fools. I was even at the side of Johnny Jo at one point in time... but not anymore.



After 25 long years as a criminal I knew it was the end of my days as a con. I needed a disguise. I could not reveal my real name, but I did devise a clever alias: Gina Gerald. I was just just your friendly neighbourhood lady. Sitting on her porch watching the world go by.



Johnny just wouldn't stop, though. We used to do it for the thrills... I'm not sure why he still does it. 30 years in the biz is bound to drive a man mad.



The day finally came when I met up with Johnny Jo once and for all. He was in the middle of a train heist when I showed up.


"Why don't you just quit Johnny? It's time to retire!"
"Well if it isn't little Gina. I don't think they need a hero... heheh.

"
And just like that, Johnny jumped off the train. Coward. Running away... Just like that. He was a mad man afterall.



But this came as quite a problem when the train stopped... They thought it was me. I held up the train? No! It was Johnny! The cops took me away. After all these years... I finally got caught, and it was that damned Johnny Jo!

I was sentenced for life in prison.



(and that's basically how I'd go to prison if I were a convict.)

Seriously lmao why does almost everyone i hangout with say I'm hilarious and like laugh at everything I say...Like I'll be acting totaly honest and they will just laugh at me and then...I'm all like .. wtf?

I have no idea on how but i get people to the point were they piss themselves because they are laughing so hard...and I'm just sitting there like why are you laughing man?and then it pisses me off becaus ei don't knwo what the fuck is going on lmaoI really don't think I'm funny nothing I say is funny it's mostly just stupid shit that makes me even think why the hell did I say that? But for some reason everyones laughing at me because I said it.  I really don't understand...

Ya man haha you tihnk over the 20 years that my mom has been a mother she would know how to make a simple pot of maceroni BUT no lmaoooo she really can't it always comes out tasting looking OR feeling odd =| 

LMAO i remeber she made kraft dinner and it had chunks of cheese in it man i seriously couldn't eat it i wa sliek AHHH ew mom ew. and another time it was really WATERY i wa sliek wtf?...and one time it was really dry lmao

and NOOOW it tastes liek someone dumped a bottle of water in it LMAO it dosen't even taste like kraft dinner you can't even taste the cheese LMAO...

man if anyone can make KD it's sara germani that fkn kid can make it sooo awesome maan she should show my mom how to make kraft dinner seriously i remeber me and my brother used to liek cry when my mom bought it or we would throw it out of the shopping cart before she would buy it LMAO

that makes you smile
that makes you cry
that makes you mad
that makes you happy
theres always that one boy
that makes your day 100% better
after talking to him
or even seeing him pass by when your driving in your car
and even though you have known him for almost 5 years
you still get butterflies in your tummy
everytime he comes over
and the only thing you can think about is him
and how lucky you are to have a friend like him
and even if he dosen't feel the same way
it's ok because he's still your friend
and knowing that should make you feel
like 100 x's better because who knows
you might be friends for a very long time
or you might be more then friends in the future

Lol wow kay so i drunk a whole bottel of red wine and my frin ekd told me to maek a myspace bjulliten to myself!!! HI JEZZKA HOW ARE YOU NOW THAT YOUJR'E NOT DRUNK ANYMORE HAHAHA REMINDER TO SELF; CHECK CHAT LOGS TO MAKE SUJRE NOTHING STUIPID WAS SAID :P

so yea i didnt eamn todr imkt eh whole bottle LOL WHY CANT I TUYPE RIGHT TONIGHT JESUS but i did anyway and i just oopsed and yeah ono

lots of people are tlaknig to me on msn omg I had 13 caht windows open!!!!!!!!!!!11111 OMGGGGGGGGG i think its because i said to them to talk to me if they dared to becaus im drunk and when im drunk im a hoot to talk to donctha know lolol

t6he iwne was good i want more wine i like red wine but mostly with meals excepot this one i wanted just a few sips but i drank the whole thing oops

wow looking at my typing style when im drunk i remind meself when i was young and trying lol i mean typing i didnt erase that cuz that sounded funny lol young and trying.......................buit anyway it reminds me of when i type young and i was annoying lolol hilariosujenss

wow i wondefr whta the percentageis in ths wine probably bot that much because i get buzzed from a few sips of wahtever lmao i guess i'm not wine material because i get drunk from it!!! im glad im a light drunk though because i don't jhave to spend like 50 bucks on booze to get edrunk

i see my mirror and i have a big smile and no eyes lol

i wonder wht i twould be like if i walked around my romo lol i'd probably fall over something like that matress thats stil on my floor fo omse reason... well because i keep moving aroujnd and wafdling from side to side with my mouth open and smiling LOL omg wow I look funny in mirror... but yeah I'm going in circles now sitting down and I remind me of a dizzy person that spun around too much LOL my eyebrows went up like HI THERE HOW YA DONG THERE BUDDY

Okay. I'll try to type nmormally now. HOLY SHIT I CAN'T WOA. I can't remember where the keys are!!! It looks like I'm watching a tv from underneath me. WO WI THINK I TYPED THAT ALL RIHGT.

But that's how it feels its rrazy shit man!!!!!1

moving feels funny haha ho ho hehe haha lala huhu hehe hoho I'm missing a vowel dammit!! OH HIHI.. HAHAHAKFJVDM

Wow. I just realized I drank a whole fucking bottle of wine.

*stupid*

I eekp grabbin the bottle thinking that there's more fun to drink from!!! but there's none its semptty.. wah fucking wah! You know a funny thing about me being drunk is that I still have common sense and logic and all that stuff, its just harder to do things. like I remember I was crying because people wanted me to go to sleep and some guy offered me a 'soother' and he poulled out his epenis in fronot of my fafce i aws laughing atit and i said on lololol cuz i may get durnk but I think SMART.

yesssssssssssssssssssssssojgfmbcv

You know I really don't like hard drinks i Just like light ones like beer and wine

HOLY SHIT IK JUST CRAWLED AROUND MY ROOM AND IT FELT SO WEIRD

I'M DRUNK YOU GUTYS

WHOAAAAAAAAA I WANT TO GO OUTSIDE FOR A WALK but I won't because I'm still smart lol

BUY ME MORE WINE PEOPLE plzkthx

I love being drunk and moving around because it feels funny.

I think I'll go to the bathroom since I want to move around so brb
.................

LOL that was fun but I'e been drnker!! Im running out of things to sya bjut I'm sure I'd hae more if I wasn't getting anonyed wiht this BLASTED KEYOARD.

bye